I should have never walked away

as with all poetry i put up here, unless stated, i don't believe this one is truly finished, but its decent. This is true, and i think the words explain themselves. . .

I can’t get back
The years I sacrificed
Thinking myself of stronger moral
Character
And all the other bullshit reasons
I used to justify
Leaving you. . .

In reality I was afraid
I left because
The fact my age reached 18
Gave me a bridge
To escape something that would swallow me whole
Something I didn’t want to fight
But raised Italian Catholic
I was forced to hide
The brightest burning passion of my life

Even though I heard your parents’ whispers
The half caught glares
Of warning
You were too young for me
That’s not what drove me from you
I wasn’t ready to come out
All the questions
And  halted conversations
When entering a room
people saying “bi, well, at least
She’ll end up marrying a guy
When this phase is through”

We’re both still young
But life has put us at the end of spectrums. . .
I don’t know if we’d work out
No one to blame by my own frailty
I still feel robbed of the chance to
Wake up next to you
Watch as your lids lift
To reveal the color of
Perfect summer skies

I could revisit you endlessly
You are
The addiction I’d willingly relapse into
No matter what road I end up traveling
No matter how many people I end up hurting. . .


Happy
if you are, then state it,
Its  your turn to  push me away
I know I deserve no consideration
No second chance
Fear is only an excuse
Not a reason to forgive me. . .
I should have never walked away

Author's Note

this is not "done", everything with me is a work in progress. I believe it needs a stronger conclusion. . .

Reviews

[theunionisloud]

Beautiful. I think we've all felt like this before... that we're not worth the tremendous love that life graces us with. While we are deserving, we also make mistakes that can't be undone and weigh down on us every single time we try to make decisions. You really capture this idea very well. If it's a love worth having, though, no one will be walking away. Great piece.

[The Cougar's Den]

Oh my...I caught my breath several times while reading this. And I wanted to pick a favorite line, but I would have only ended up copying the entire piece....I love the line about the color of her eyes....brilliant...as well as the lines about 'the bridge', 'being robbed', and 'addiction' - all perfect and recreating images in my mind.

What a treasured write this is and I am putting it in My Favorites right this instant before it whispers into the air and disappears.

GREAT WRITE! How perfect to start my day....