The Journey

The Journey

From what country of thought, seeks a man, the Devil.

Twilight, while the failing sun lies sinister and tiny on his face.

Beyond the shadows the Devil keeps walking, brooding and darkening in his demeanor.

He's a long way from home and camps lightly on his thoughts this night.

Arid signs before the fire of his youth, he burns memories like kindle wood.

He sees the signs in the smokey ashes of his life and would atone for the misgivings of his faith.

From what country of thought, could such a man seek the road back to his heart?

Nameless and trying to recall his thoughts, he has grown old all through his life.

He wonders what memories God would take comfort in to seek shelter from the last of days.

When the world was new and death stayed his hand.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Gleb Zavlanov]

You're a master of horror and myth. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems to me, this poem is about sin and purification. I may be wrong, but I can't be wrong about the writing. It's a great mix of poetry, horror, and myth, which in turns gives it a mystical essence. Great poem!

[Raymond Federle]

thx.......insert smiley face here>>>>>

[Nusquam Esse]

This is intriguing, very thoughtful. It is an intriguing thought, the devil wandering to ponder his past. Even if he doesn't truly age, he still has a youth where the world seemed more simple, or at the least, different. Only typo I noticed was "He's sees", I am assuming you meant seen? You spin some great and unique metaphors in this, which makes me wonder if the tale of devil and god is meant to be taken literally or not.

[Raymond Federle]

Thx for the typo spot.. corrected! LOL I've read this poem half a dozen times and didn't see it. No one else saw it either I guess. Cant see the forest for the trees.

[Nusquam Esse]

It is probably because people on here don't usually go out of their way to look for typos. I can completely understand missing your own typo after several times though; happens to me all the time.

[Michael Stevens]

"He burns memories like kindling wood." A stand-out line from a stand-out poem!

[Frieda P]

Your metaphors are off the charts Raymond, this one is really affecting and poignant, I never know where your poetry will take me...

"He's sees the signs in the smokey ashes of his life and would atone for the misgivings of his faith"

Sounds like something the illustrious Mr Cohen would pen...awe inspiring.

[Jack...]

Raymond, my friend. Your words always hit home...finding me ready and willing to accept. very cool my friend.

[Pryde Foltz]

Raymond you have such a spectacular way with words. Your metaphors are skilled and original. If I could offer one suggestion, it would be about presentation. I read a lot of poem on here and I can't help but think you use a font just too large. Unlike prose, poetry should be taken in with the eye too, and with the space your lines take up on the page, I find myself reading it like prose. I offer this only as an opinion. I love your work one way or another.

[Raymond Federle]

Yeah, sometimes I forget and use to big a font. My eyesight has been getting bad last year or so and I tend to forget that not everyone needs letters the size of the HOLLYWOOD sign in California! LOL :) I adjusted it a bit!

[paddy d daly]

a philosophical piece of work raymond, gets the mind going, the battle between good and evil rages ever on, enjoyed the read......

[Baby Ricochet]

I really like this one. It's kinda ominous and s**t.

[Sami Khalil]

I feel like you know him a lot based on your thoughts here or you know the relationship better between him and God. I think the Devil's fate has been sealed and no atonement will suffice him. He is doomed to eternal hell in the Bible and the Koran from what I know.
A wonderful questionings here if I'm reading you right...:)...........

[Raymond Federle]

As always my friend, you see through to the heart of the equation. :)

[RealistMe]

Hmm. This poem really makes people think. The line, "Nameless and trying to recall his thoughts, he has grown old all through his life." I would change it to be "Nameless and trying to recall his thoughts, he has grown old throughout his life." Anyway, I like the poem.

[Lyn Anderson]

A wonderful write as always, wandering in the dark becomes you. Two minor suggestions: You might want switch out lays for lies, and take the apostrophe off of see's. :)

[Raymond Federle]

Thanks KL...you are indeed ever watchful! Done. :)

[Lyn Anderson]

No problem. I happen to think great poets should always be seen at their best:)

[A. Amos]

Such a powerful subject! Your writing is so magnificently constructed, great job my friend...