10-13-15

10-13-15

What are the contests I must face?  Maimed I no longer feel much agony.  Yet here I walk a charred memory with no place for me.  I want to rest in peace but it just won’t fade away; the memories of anguish.  Between my ribs the knives twist.  Under my skin the bugs persist to crawl.  I once believed they were the products of my disbelief.  Where do I go to escape?  The misery is killing me.  And I must hide from the demons inside.  I wish it would just go away!  Voices scream, curse my name and though I try to forget the monsters are here to stay!  Shadows pass through the walls.  Faces press out and sing a siren’s call.  Decay boils away the lies.  And I just want to rest in peace!

So does the walk of men surrender to a great possible evil, the heels of their boots disturb her delicate condition and upturn sorrow.  I, in my mind, see the brutality of not just their lies, but greed as it moves swift and unjust.  They cower only in the presence of a higher power, one they cannot control with their whips and restrain with their chains.

      Tell me it is not when their rage boils and they strike out against an innocent.  Tell me that when their rage turns to lust they do not force themselves upon a lady whose favors are unwilling, untouched and certainly fruits of purity.  For these reasons I must reserve my sanity so that one day I might lash out against the society who created these beasts and have their walls crumble down.

  I present a simple human being as a mere change of life, an ever evolving creature flawed and driven by emotion.  Though thought to be intelligent life I ask this question: how can one be intelligent when hate is such a prominent factor in its history?

          I watched camouflaged soldiers manipulate their weapons for the best brutal result. In orange and yellow bursts destructive silver hurled through smoke and fire. Crimson holes manifested in those bodies now falling out of sight. It was here where old and young came to give their lives for a corrupt world order.

Humans affair with war will result in extinction, but not of flesh rather compassion and tolerance. It will murder belief and challenge. When it all comes down hell will take on a new definition.

“So my hell child is going to devour you. It will be painful, you pathetic excuse of a man, but that is the whole point to this. I can’t ever allow you to hinder my plans,” I explained. “You were a nuisance when your brother was an alive and you’re a nuisance now. So die already."

Ever changing corridors stretched in countless directions though came to the same end. Such an inescapable malady provided reality with junctions where death paraded. It wore assorted disguises, spoke a variety of language and discriminated against none.

My black ink appeared foreign as my vision doubled. Between wooden planks affixed to every window I caught glimpses of stars embroidered across a navy firmament. Sitting under this gloomy roof my examination shifted beyond time and space boundaries. I find peace in knowing death is an illusion. Perhaps mankind can find solace in that. Then again the human mind is a constant working machine that constantly needs care.

I wish I knew how to comfort my own variety of horrors. My mind is its own worst enemy after all. I can do nothing to change this and perhaps someday I will cease the desire to change it. Anything can happen. I have learned this much.