Confiscated Love

sometimes it is really hard to come out from grief....but life has to go on......

I gone astray by the tricks you played on me,

The untrustworthy love had left me with nothingness,

Turning back to the thorny way is worthless.

Grief of betrayal is intensified, but I know to come out of it,

All I found in love is your broken vows and bogus sayings

You tried to intercede; I was no more in need of it.

I was wrong for trusting you blindly,

I never knew you would prove me blind one fine day.

‘I love you’, you uttered recklessly

To devastate me forever was your mission,

I guess now you feel enhanced, for am shattered now

For a split second death engrossed me,

Subsequently I took back my erroneous conclusion.

Your love was fake, but I am a weakling no more,

I demystify to myself and peter out this obsession.

The impact of your seamy behavior hurted me,

Destroyed my feelings and stripped me off my innocence,

Distorted my heart to a firm rock killing my confidence.

All that happened turns out, was for a good will,

I would now think before any action and never let myself down.

You didn't cheat me; rather you resented the divine love

For this sin, you will be obsessed en route for hell,

You deserve much further than this for making my soul feeble.

Love is pleasant, but you were a perpetrator and mistrustful,

But one day, my horrific epoch would burn to ashes making soul powerful.

Author's Note

We cannot choose our external circumstances,
but we can always choose how to respond to them.

Reviews

[Rahul]

Yeah, i do agree with your Author's Note... you're right well said that we can't choose our external circumstances because we're already trapped in our internal life's fluctuations that happns everyday in our life and how to deal with that depends on the man how he deal with that... sometimes love doesn't work but that doesn't mean that your the worthless in this world but you deserve something much better higher than love in the suit of opportunities indeed.

your this write's been come from your real life or you made this write seeing the realness's of life. I likeed this piece that's very though provoking one. Great job. 100/100.

[Vani Jalagar]

:-)...thank you for giving your precious time to read my poem....

[Rahul]

Well, it's always my pleasure to read writes of great writers as you;re because there i don't utilize my time read their piece but get something new learning in my life... how the things happens and what's going on in the real life....AND i found that i really got something or learn something new from your pieces indeed.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I understand the sentiment here...the concept is one that I think a lot of us can relate to. Love is one of the strangest emotions that we feel as humans, because it is so deep and has a mind of its own; in essence we are often a slave to what we feel even when we don't want to feel it any longer.

Technically:
Mostly some tense issues -- For example, the first line "I gone" should be "I have gone", somewhere else I saw "behavior hurted me", when it should be "behavior hurt me", etc. A few off words here and there..."seamy behavior", perhaps "seedy behavior"? Possibly a little "wordy" at times...you could cut out some of the unnecessary words.

With that said, please understand those are just technical points and don't effect the power of what you are trying to say in your writing. I did enjoy and "feel" the sentiment here. Look forward to reading more from you :)

[Vani Jalagar]

Thank you for showing the mistakes..I will improve in my next writing keeping the technical issues in mind.