Chapter 4

Just another dream....

Chapter 4

My bed feels cold and grainy beneath me and I lay there praying the alarm will not go off this morning and not quite sure why I’m awake. That by some miracle I don’t have to face the task of dragging myself to school. That when I open my eyes the world won’t be upside-down as it has been the past 2 years. That everything will be as it should. But no…miracles are only things of fairy tales and hopelessly hopeful souls. I sigh to myself and try to fall back asleep before the day comes to seize me.

Though I try many methods, sleep eludes me as it has many nights in recent years.  Though it seems just beyond me, like there is a thin wall of glass keeping it away, as I’m comforted by the caressing blanket and lulling sensation of motion. Motion. This all too familiar motion. Like waves pulling my form back and forth across a sea bed.

No. no no no no no no no no no! I clutch myself tightly and can’t help but feel the whoosh of liquid as I move. No! I think to myself, not again! I pinch myself trying to wake my mind from this state. No good. Something brushes my side and I try desperately to ignore it. It’s only a dream, Willow, only a dream! I tell myself this as many characters in my books have always done. If it’s only a dream then nothing can happen to me. Not very reassuring as I flash back to earlier’s encounter with this place. I desperately don’t want to face this but soon I can’t help but open my eyes.

It’s dark. Like really dark. I wave my hand in front of my face. Nothing. I blink a few times to assure myself that my eyes are really open.  Now that I think about it, I don’t think I’ve ever experienced pure darkness before living in my bustling neighborhood right outside of Denver. I strain to make something out in the darkness but light eludes me. Somehow this place is less intimidating without the swarming, distorted lights to confuse me. I push myself up onto my elbows, sinking slightly into the cold sand. I wave my hand about in front of me blindly trying to find anything but water. I succeed. My hand collides with something slick and cold…..and moving. I yelp and pull away quickly, scrambling backwards only to collide with something else.  This is slick as well but hard like a rock. I take a deep shaky breath and try to calm myself. Wait….a breath? I’m under water right? HOW AM I BREATHING? I feel my heart speed its pace and panic begins to flood my veins. No! I tell myself. It’s just a dream, nothing can hurt you! It’s still not very convincing but I manage to calm myself enough to take a few more reassuring breaths….. of water. This breathing feels strange, like normal breathing, but heavier and I don’t need so many breaths. The water tastes salty. It dawns on me that I must be in an ocean. I’ve only been to ocean once before on a family trip to Florida when I was 11. It took me half the trip to let my parents convince me to swim out to where the water was deeper than a couple feet and even then I constantly clutched my dad’s arm like it was my life line. Slowly I grew more comfortable with the water and began playing around by myself and pretending to be a slow motion ballerina……that is until I saw that stingray that sent me ungracefully dashing to the shore calling for my mom.

I smile to myself at the memory and relax slightly against the cold surface behind me. A soft moaning sound comes to my ears strangely clear from my left. It sounds like the whales I’ve heard on the discovery channel. It occurs to me that that’s probably what it is. I c**k my head to that side and listen intently to the oddly calming music. It seems like the whales are mourning with that low long beautiful sound. I used to love music, I even took lessons. I was getting rather good when it happened, I haven’t sung since. Yet I still listen to music….not the happy kind, but classical stuff, I guess it’s soothing.  The whale songs lull me into a trance and I lay there listening as the ocean rocks me gently like a mother with her child. My eyelids grow heavy and before I lose consciousness I think to myself how strange to fall asleep in a dream.

* * *

I never open my eyes when I wake up. It’s always been that way. I suppose I like to try and catch the remnants of whatever I dreamt before it flutters away forever and consciousness floods in. I lay there with my eyes shut watching the display of colors that seep through thinking well now; I wonder why I’m still here? I suppose I must still be dreaming, although, now that I think about it, I don’t recall ever being so conscious in a dream before. Well, there’s really nothing you can do about it, is there? I sigh, reasoning that my inner voice is probably right. Slowly I peel my eyes open, gazing at the brilliance before me.

Wow. Sometimes when there’s nothing else to describe something wow just seems to come to mind. That seems suitable to the scene before me as I’m held enamored by the ocean’s glory. I stare at the dazzling, mind-numbing scene of beauty with its fantastic array of colors varying in shades and hues I didn’t know existed. A coral reef of deep blues and greens mixed with delicate shades of gray rock, tower around me in castle-like ways with many “doors” revealing a cascade of creatures wandering about with quick graceful movements and slow chunky glides. Fish of all colors and sizes drift around me and little sea floor dwellers scuttle around, for a moment I wonder if my mind has created some new universe. For all I know I could be on another planet.  The light dances on the tan ocean floor like the way you see it through a swaying tree.

As I push myself into a sitting position most fish around me don’t pay much attention to me as they mind their own business, but a gray shape catches my eye and I turn to see a long, slender thresher shark gliding towards me. I remember learning about this shark at the aquarium and how it stuns its prey with its massive tail. I squeak, which sounds oddly clear considering the water, and shield my face with my arms. I feel its cold body slide across my arms and I clench up tighter with anticipation. Nothing happens. I can’t feel it anymore. All I feel is the cool ocean water moving around me. I peek through my arms, seeing no shark I relax. Now that the fear is gone logic feels my mind and I realize that sharks don’t attack humans very often and it was probably full anyway. I sigh.

I should probably move or something, I think to myself. A sudden urge to explore this wonderland enters my mind.  Just as I move to stand an extreme need to sleep rushes over me like a wave. I fight it, not wanting to leave this serene world but it’s like being pulled down by a black hole. My legs kick weakly, and as I collapse my eyes catch a glimmer of something odd at my feet.

 

Author's Note

Please leave any commments about anything! Thankkkkkkk yooooouuuuu!

Reviews

[Jose Ramirez]

is this based off of you? goth, 16 years old, denver....and Willow has a pet chinchilla named teddy.......

[Jose Ramirez]

uuuuuuuhhhhhhh, I'm not smart enough to comprehend this. BUT I STILL LOVE IT! haha

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Fiercely intelligent, well done

[Tasha]

I liked it, it was really good.