Incongruous Race

Just thought of a twist with the old rabbit tortoise parable...ofcourse the rabbit is more from Alice in Wonderland...just a topsy turvy fantasy

The bespectacled rabbit ran

Saying"Catch me if you can"

Its tail was bobbing up and down

Suddenly it began to frown

The tortoise wasn't in the race any more

Its aged paws were sore

"Hey I'll give you a handicap"

Rabbit said " Come on old chap!"

Tortoise said "Cross the finish line..

To see you win the pleasure is mine"

Reviews

[None]

Wow, I really like this twist to the old tale. What excellent pictures you have with this! It's all very special. I like how the tortoise lets the rabbit win. It's as if the tortoise is saying, "I've got better things to do than to keep this race up with you!" Your poem is precious!

This is a friendlier twist to the tortoise and the hare. They became friends. I look forward to seeing children's books using this revised version

[THE BLACK SEAL]

lol i liked it i have no other critique of it other than i abot died laughing when the clock unexpectedly popped up

[The Elder Pine]

Well done piece, a great twist on the old tail.

[AK]

This is great!

[Rain]

I love this piece. To give up winning for the gift of giving it to the turtle was character at it's finest. It's a jesture we as humans could adopt more often. Beautiful. Rain..

[Simmering embers]

You have so beautifully captured a maternal essence in this poem.....The hare represents unbridled energy and youth much like the son and the tortoise represents serenity, patience and unconditional love...much like the mother...and the mother lets the son go...treads along with him till a point in his life and after that, falls behind and eventually lets him go and win his own race...

[Mayukh Das]

beautiful........

ne other comment wud b too small......

so just beautiful.

[Robert Luna]

Great story. I think it captures a humanistic quality to it with the fact that we often cheer on the underdog because we like the idea of the unseen hero to win. I like this and am glad you sent this my way. Sorry took me awhile to read been a little sick.


Great Job!!!!!!!!

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I like this , the twist is a nice one .. it reminds me of childhood and Alice in Wonderland.. the writing is great, the pictures go so well .. a really nice job,

Chloe
xoxo

[The Archangel Gabriel]

An interesting twist upon the ancient fable. Sometimes, the pleasure is in seeing somebody else take the prize.

-Gabe