See, Saw, Seen

To see, feel, delve, and love

See Saw Seen

 

Looking at me with the same ignorance

Makes me feel more inclined to you

 

Looking at you with my endless cultivation

Of knowing you more

Makes you feel rejuvenated every time that

I read from your eyes;

‘I am reborn’, you said after a while

 

Looking at us from a far away point

Makes me feel ‘gone the days are when

White was black, black white’

 

Looking at you with a far cry to understand

The growing distance originated between us

Every times makes you irritated at the verge of our

Relationship!

 

I tried a lot to arrest your gaze at that

What if you did the same also!

 

Looking at the other couples clogging neck-in-neck

On road, in the bus, at the shore, inside the room

Makes me inquire do they have inequalities

Like we did have sometimes back?

 

Where are those rosy days crystal to eyes,

Divine by the dark, bigger than egos, lofty than casualties,

And lovely than love we lost long ago?

Reviews

[Ivory]

I really enjoy this piece, though at times the flow seem to throw me off a bit.
It was sad yet a beautiful reflextion on a relationship and the things that can get lost as time progresses.
Very good write... ; )

[Gandré]

Looking at you with a far cry to understandThe growing distance originated between usEvery times makes you irritated at the verge of our relationship -----------this was beautiful. I thought what a sad piece and so sensitively written, this love situation is fragile. it hurts to be given away..but one just cannot demand anything. it is a miracle. thank you dear Raja for reviewing so many pieces, also my newest one. hug. lara.

[Kitty]

Such a beautifully thought provoking poem!

Nicely done!

Josie

[Chaos]

I read this piece twice. The first time I read it, I was getting interrupted by uneven flow in places, but then when I read it again, I found the meaning or (at least) the meaning I took from this piece. Love is so brilliant in the infancy stages; reborn. As time flys by us, we change, chemically, emotionally, and even physically. The eyes of the beholder change with experience and things aren't as rosey as onced percieved.

What your describing is a normal part of life; familiararity. It's sad when the familiar becomes mundane and then the mundane becomes a sense of loss of what we use to share or when the grass was greener on OUR side of the fence.

Nice write.

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

Ah, a sad ending to this longing piece. Thank you for sharing your talent once again. Love can be a many splendored yet elusive thing I feel you capture that well here.
Light,
Siddartha

[An owl on the moon]

Your words are moving and emotive, challenging us to reflect upon ourselves and our place in love's world. Insightful and thought provoking!

Craig

[Nicole (Carpe Diem)]

beautiful piece - full of emotion - nicely done

[emmajoy]

This is sad. You 're asking questions of yourself, your past lover, your love. There's almost a wistfulness in the poem, a regret for something very important having gone.

'Where are those rosy days crystal to eyes' - a sweetly phrased question.

Some of the metre's gone a little astray but, the phrasing is so fine so, it's almost unimportant.

Thank you for sharing.

[T]

Your writings takes me to many levels ... I feel the frustration, the longing and the love ... wonderfully written, Raja ... hugs