Sojourn - River

Sometimes we are jubilant to find lost love, while sometimes we could not keep it for fear of missing it once again. Sojourn demonstrates the different phases of love one has encountered in life.

 

River

 

It sounded like a mile to count the distance

That we run not giving a pause �" in the midst we touched, loved, kissed,

Ruined the so-called decorum, fined each other with worries at home,

Left the bus to go home, cried, argued, quarreled, patched up, smooched tightly

For grace mark, and again cried, argued, and left at last �" to test our lovely

Syndrome, and to feel our compromising qualities to stand

The weight that we used to give each other

 

Now, let’s draw this journey,

It goes on like a river with several lanes and by-lanes

With a few deltas peeping in its course

But at last, there is no bay toward the ocean

Because, all of a sudden, it’s taken a U-turn toward nowhere…

Reviews

[Chaos]

Life is so funny that way isn't it? I know when I go down one stream and it leads to the main river, I'm excited simply because of the vastness of it and then suddenly the current pulls me away from the secruity that I found only to send me down a dead end stagnant pond that the mighty river leads into. Stuck!

Great write!

[Vanessa]

I've been missing your requests!!
Well, in any case, I love this. Greath job.

--vk

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

Ah, the ending is so melancholic to me. Makes me sad to see something come to an end it seems yet the river flows on and on. Nice work. Succinct and telling.
Light,
Siddartha

[April Child]

Love is definately a force that is out of our control, like the river taking us on a journey to who knows where. We have to go with it because to swim against the tide is impossible for any length of time even when it takes us to a place we don't want to go. Very nice metaphor.

"Ruined the so-called decorum"

I like this line particularly.

[Gandré]

Hello Raja, fantastic composition here! I adored the metaphor of river and love making, both it is flowing somewhere and one doesn't know where it is going to, just a natural motion.. Very sweet and romantic way how you arranged the parts here in relation to each other and to the whole poem, a harmonious composition like this is essential in a serious work of art, I loved it. (thank you for reading my new poem Mastery and your benevolent review, much appreciated.) l.gandr�