The Ocean and the Seed

My fears have left me stranded, and wanting 

Yearning, unlearning what I once called truth 

Unsurely outspeaking, unknowing, yet reaching f

For that ledge to find you 

To feel the warmth of blue

I stand with my back at the shores of time 

Picking with calloused hands at bits of sand and glass heart 

Scattered over the ruins of my past life 

Hoping the slowly ticking and tocking won't drain the rest of me away 

So here I stay

Feet buried, eyes blurry, mind worried that my soul's leaving 

All the while I choke 

This pit of fear in my throat 

Swallowing my words I've yet to speak, and taking back the ones I spoke before my humanity and sanity broke 

My left hand trembles with these fragments that have already died 

My right one with the little seed my tree of past life left behind 

I'm so terrified 

If I cultivate this new reality it might just die 

Better to leave it a pathetic little seed,

Than a beautiful new tree with a heart, roots and leaves 

At least that's what my mind thinks 

But not anymore 

My heart knows different now, and now i see 

This is not the way it should be 

This seed of life was meant to be a tree. 

So In the ground I plant this seed 

My shattered heart pieces I toss to the wind 

And the rest of me I give to the sea. 

So shall my past be, so shall my life begin.