My Mind

"Be yourself"

everyone says the same thing

but I wonder if I'm doing it right

because the words still sting

I try and try so hard

to make the world see my point of view

but I keep falling short

when I don't have a clue

I can't explain to anyone

exactly what I lack

but I noticed one thing

I'm wishing for my depression back

I know it's not right

but every single day

I'm missing that peaceful numbness

that fades this black to a soft gray

The days when cutting was normal

seem like bliss

compared to the emotional torment

that surfaces on days like this

I'm trying to get better

but my thoughts won't quiet down

inside my head, I'm screaming

outside, I just wear a quiet frown

I'm trapped in my head

confused about what I'm feeling

wish I could tell my mother the truth

tell her I'm healing

I know I'm not

each day feels worse and worse

need to reach out

maybe I need a nurse

Reviews

[Simone Davis]

This was 100% relatable very talented and gifted

[R.E. Ray]

Nickole, you so powerfully and purely convey pain, depression, frustration, and anxiety in this poem. And, still I sense hope---the undeniable human spirit that inspires poetry and invites inquiry and discovery.

"Being yourself," regrettably, often means suffering through periods of self-doubt and searching for an inner strength, the rare power that compels us beyond what other's say, think, and do. "Being yourself" is often standing alone and denying conformity and others' expectations. Keep writing. You do a fine job of convey raw, intense emotion.