Walking Contradiction

This is about my bi-polar disorder.

I don't know if it can be attributed to the stars,
Or if it's just in my blood,
Maybe both,
But, there is an internal war,
Within myself,

Yin and yang,
Both inside my soul,
The two parts that make me,
Are as different as can be,
Like night and day,

Caring and compassionate,
I'd give up all I have for those I love,
Ask me for help,
And, you know I'd come running,
Even at three in the morning,

When my cycles shift,
The story changes,
Don't bother me,
It's not my problem,
Haven't you got someone else who can help you?

Determined,
Ready to take on the world,
There is nothing I can't do,
I will be a best selling author, an Oscar winner, a Broadway star,
And, the best mommy, daughter, worker, and friend,

Sulking,
Lying in bed,
I don't want to get dressed,
Some days, I eat all day or sometimes nothing at all,
I'm a loser, a failure, and you're all better off without me,

I confuse many,
Even myself,
Bi-polar is a nasty disorder,
And, when untreated,
You never know which me you'll get,

When in control,
I still have relapses,
That just comes with the territory,
But, to love me,
Is to know me, all of me...the walking contradiction.

Reviews

[Belinda Rice]

i really get this you have tooken apart of my heart with this one.......I am bipolor and i have went through alot of depression i have depression poems on here.........i feel you all the way great peace

[None]

They say when you know the enemy you face it gets easier. You really did a fantastic job writing on a difficult subject here. Faith and not giving into the illness can promote wellness, along with medication. I work at a hospital and see those who don't take care of themselves and get lost in addictions. Stay strong-- like your poem indicates about you and go on to be all you want to be. Minimize the lapses by taking care of yourself and say no to taking on too much for others. Just remember, you can't keep a good woman down! Awesome poem.