Txt Me Ur Trubles (satire)

A slightly humorous look at a current trend in society.

 

This morning my little brother asked me why the sky was blue over Lucky Charms and Tropicana Orange Juice.  With a crunch of sweetened marshmallow perfection, never looking up from my cereal,
 I responded simply,” Not sure. Let me use my iPhone to Google search that question and I will let you know.”   Thus, with my eyes squarely focused on the small luminescent screen next to me, I tapped the words into the small search field box. I heard him slide his chair out and wander over to our sliding door.
                He moved the sliding screen door open, and a gush of the chilling autumn breeze blew through the kitchen. I shivered as the iPhone screen loaded with the answer to his question. I read out loud to him why the sky was blue, and his immediate response was,” How would you know?” My first thought was Wikipedia very rarely has flat out false information, so it is a strong basis from which to launch an informative discussion.
                That, however, is not what he meant.
                With a ninja-like maneuver, utilizing his nimble child fingers, he snatched the iPhone from my hands and darted outside. I lunged from the kitchen table after him, spilling papers all over the linoleum tile. Unprepared for the cool air outside, I shivered, but continued my pursuit into our backyard. He stood there, in the middle of the lawn, waving the device mockingly. I proceeded towards him cautiously, anticipating further trickery from this pre-pubescent master of deceit, my arms out stretched slightly, palms turned up as a treatise of peace. He stood his ground defiantly, still holding my social, educational, and technological lifeline above his head.  We circled carefully in the lawn, attempting to anticipate each other’s next move, an elegant game of chess playing out in live action.
     I pleaded with him,” Listen, whatever you are doing, stop. I need that, just give it back.”
                That was the wrong thing to say. Check.
                My brother yelled back,” What is wrong with you? I’m a generation apart from you, and I can see what this stupid thing is doing to you, your friends, and everyone else!”
                Taken aback, I moved swiftly. I threw my whole body forward, stampeding across the lawn like a rampaging buffalo, and reached for the iPhone above his head. His arm cocked back, and with the power of a 10 year old, he rocketed the phone over the fence and onto the adjacent street. In the distance, a crunch is heard as my phone greets the pavement, and I thought for a second I felt a little bit of my soul die.
Checkmate.
” That stupid thing makes you stupid! It destroys your creativity! When was the last time you looked up? Did you even know the sky was blue, or did you simply know the ground was grey, or brown, or brownish-grey? You are pathetic!”
                I kept running right past him as he said this, hopping onto the fence and peering earnestly onto the road. Sitting there, in several pieces scattered across the pavement, was my dear phone. The screen flickered desperately, crying out to me to save it while I still could, so I scrambled up and over the fence. I landed to the shout of,” Go ahead! Take the stupid thing back! Be a boring, brainless dumb person like the rest of your friends! I was just trying to save you!”
                The street was quiet, a divine favor from Him (Steve Jobs), so I took advantage of the moment to collect the fragments of this holy relic off of the cold grey pavement and reconstruct the device. Tapping the screen, it weakly flickered, taunting and teasing the notion of returning to its former glory. I shouted over the fence,” I swear to God, if it is broken, I will kill you and/or tell Mom!” The threat fell on deaf ears as no response floated back my way. The phone came back to life, and I slid my finger across as if a magician, pulling up the texting service. I immediately punched out a mass text to all of my friends:
MY LITTLE BROTHER JUST TRIED TO BREAK MY PHONE. WTF IS WRONG WITH HIM.
                As the message was sent, I heaved a sigh of relief and slumped against the fence. Looking up, it turns out the sky was in fact blue this morning.

Reviews

[THERISA]

A brilliant satirical piece on humanity's dependance upon technology. Personally, i find modern cellphones are too far evasive in our lives. One can't go anywhere, being track by a GPS chip in it. Whatever happen to private and the right to your own personal space? Please pardon my rant on the evils of cells.

As for the technical side of this story, your dialogues are realistic and flow naturall, when reading them. Especially, like the way that the younger brother is written by you. Totally felt the frustration of the protagonist, when the little brother tossed the cell phone out. Thank you for sharing this story with us.

[WriterMe]

Ohkay so the little kid did have a point. Maybe cellphones are destroying the young creative minds. But still, there are both positive and adverse effects to this.
Nevertheless I really liked your story. When I tend to describe scenes involving little kids, I always end up using grade 4 grammar. But you little scene with the kid was very very well described.

anticipating further trickery from this pre-pubescent master of deceit

haha this made me smile. Great work. Will be reading more from you

--Niki

[Elvina CZq]

I have to agree with that little kiddo in the story. He might be a kid (which refers to children in the society today), but he knows better than the rest of the society who think they know everything just because of the developed technology and science. But then, of course, this kind of technology does save quite a number of lives (eg. mobile phone - wireless, easy to carry, benefits for emergencies). Otherwise, it does screw up the educations (what I meant by this is the spelling for the most part). Anyhow, I still able to enjoy this story with a smile. It's so true.

Thank you for sharing. So glad I'm stopping bu for a read and laugh.

[:)]

I think a part of the problem is I dont think people were meant to stay in contact with so many people. It's restless. In days of old from Medieval to American Colonies how many people kept in contact with all sorts of people at huge distances. Of course there were some letters where family and such are involved. Now days people try so hard to hold on to each person they meet and stay in direct contact with a good portion of them. Life becomes about communication as opposed to learning and ther important aspects...
I'm not a huge texting body and such but I would have to admit I'm at the computer a tad to much. However, I am working on myself, how many aren't? :)

I definitely enjoyed this...

I love how this discusses how technology is ruining life for tons of people. I mean, seriously. Why do people post everything on facebook? why is there an app on the iPhone for everything? Heck, why can we look up wikipedia on our iPhones, anyway? I really enjoyed this, nonetheless. Keep it up. :)

[Destinee]

this was an amazing short story and, unfortunately, too true about how society is taking a turn for the worse as technology seeps it's way into every second of our lives. i'm just going to ignore the fact that i'm writing this at 2 in the morning on my trusty macbook. more proof for your satire, perhaps? oh well. this was truly great and the "pre-pubescent master of deceit" reminded me that you can't spend your life with your gaze and fingers glued to the most recent technological advance and sometimes you just have to wonder why the sky is blue. what does Wikipedia know anyway? :)