closure

i never saw her body after. never saw how her lifeless body was displayed before the ground swallowed the remains. my parents kept it from me. the ugly and cold “matter-of-factness” that screamed louder than god.

 

after the funeral they told me about the viewing. how everyone got the symbolism of saying a few last words to the familiar to hold onto. i was left with an unknown image. death had claimed someone i loved and i wans’t given the option to see the body.

 

it felt like betrayal. once again my beliefs hijacked so that another mystery stays sacred. a grave is no closure. a marker is just another way of keeping your place in the story. a funeral is just another way for the remaining to come together as one.

 

i wish i could have seen her body empty, then knowing that her spirit had truly flown above the ground. as it was i was left with my faith.

 

just as my parents wanted.

 

Reviews

[Robin]

"once again my beliefs hijacked " left to fly on the wings on faith ..

[alan peter kelly]

each body...each empty conduit...accumulates on a memory / sticks as flys to flypaper...when one sees another...all the others flock the forethought and after those few moments immursed in an absolute reunion of sorrow...they whisk this new unfortunate remembrance to the backburn place to hide til next time..

[Emily B]

funerals lately are always a new adventure, Edgar Lee Masters wonders in "Silence" that we wonder why the dead do not tell us of death and that their silence shall be interpreted as we approach them. I have always loved those words.

But sometimes we get a hint beforehand.