Fox

An encounter...

Through citrus streetlights, padded an apparition,

all ribs and lolling tongue, character expectation

dulled beige; urbanised regrettably

 

[not for you the Disney coat of sleek amber,

paintbrush tail dipped in thick emulsion].

 

I thought you were The Wolf come to get me

but the moon’s absence dispelled this theory;

no leap for the jugular,

instead trotting past, and away down the street.

 

You may not have noticed my curious shadow

although, solemnly, I stood up from the wall

to watch you go.

 

Again, reality has let you down,

for there are no trash cans for you to

knock over and rummage through,

only wheelie bin sentries at the end of each drive.

 

Did I put you off your hunt?

If so, we are equal,

since you were the distraction

that dissolved my last cigarette.

 

A wave of affection followed you round the bend,

wistful loss of a companion –

for I felt us partnered in the stealth

of anti-social habits:

yours for survival, mine supposedly suicidal.

 

They say opposites attract,

so I’ve made you my friend.

 

Reviews

[Bubo]

This is lovely
I am lucky to have my own fox, he comes out and sits on my decking in the garden and looks so proud, we watch each other, he now use to me and does not take flight any longer, but has become apart of the family in a quiet way.............I adore him ..........his stillness and knowing look.
You caught my fox in your words,

A wave of affection followed you round the bend,
wistful loss of a companion �
for I felt us partnered in the stealth
They say opposites attract,
so I�ve made you my friend.

Lovely.

[October]

This is so filled with emotion.
I really like it.
And in these sentences:
'A wave of affection followed you round the bend,
wistful loss of a companion �
for I felt us partnered in the stealth
of anti-social habits:
yours for survival,
mine supposedly suicidal.'

It makes me curious for the story behind it.
Great job.
-October

[Meet Lola, The Better H..]

i like this, especially the light one-chalantness (I know that isn't a word and I probobly butchered the original but oh well >.

[Samith Pich]

this is poetry at it's lovely whimsical/wry/ self effacing goodness. i really like the gentle humour and the initial contrast of both protagonists which slowly becomes a point to ponder on - that these seemingly dispirit characters are no so unlike at all!

1. great setting:
Through citrus streetlights, padded an apparition,
all ribs and lolling tongue,

2. instead of telling us what it is, you tell us what it isn't -
(Not for you the Disney coat of sleek amber,
paintbrush tail dipped in thick emulsion).

3. i loved that wry slightly so what you're a friggin fox line:
If so, we are equal,
since you were the distraction
that dissolved my last cigarette.

4.not sure about the second last stanza, felt you could've cropped it a bit to maybe, somewhere along these lines:
wistful loss of a companion �
for I felt us partnered in the stealth
of anti-social habits:

i know what you're getting at, tho it sounds slightly off kilter, like you've almost got the exact words. perhaps:

strange how affection follows you
like a wave around the corner, a wistful loss
for a partner in crime
and other anti-social habits:

s**t, that sounds just as bad..let me get back to that.

5. the ending is cute but unnecessary. suicidal is a much stonger ending (but not as cute?)

[Ebby]

I really like this. Describing such a feeling of alienation and detachment, yet with accurate subject detail. I love the penultimate stanza, really wakes a reader up to the narrator, reminds us that the view is not our own, but borrowed.

A wave of affection followed you round the bend,
wistful loss of a companion �
for I felt us partnered in the stealth
of anti-social habits:
yours for survival,
mine supposedly suicidal.

This gets five stars from me. Thank you for sending it to me. :)

[S. Willard]

I really liked this line:

I felt us partnered in the stealth
of anti-social habits:
yours for survival, mine supposedly suicidal.

It has a very somber feel to it.

I can imagine it being just on the edge of dusk, silent but for the sound of his feet and you puffing away at your cigarette.

Good work. I'll be reading more.

[Alyssa Sta. Cruz]

Oh, I liked this. The description of the Disney fox was spot-on, and it's interesting how the man becomes foxlike upon meeting. :) Good job.