Torment

Trying out a viewpoint...

it rises up

 

this scenario

 

not poked

 

unbidden

 

just randomly flaring

 

like a distress signal

 

you and him

 

he has no face

 

but he’s good-looking

 

having conversations

 

like couples do

 

and I’m just a memory

 

from a few years ago

 

something to joke about

 

bringing you closer together

 

I remember one time, she…

 

it pains me so much

 

I almost grab for you

 

to ask whether

 

you’ve met him yet

 

 

 

does this mean I was lying

 

when I said your happiness

 

is all that matters?

 

Author's Note

Let me know what you think. Thanks.

Reviews

[F. Nazarov]

AGH, made me get all emotional.
S****y friggin s**t, I don't want to remember.
Give me a sec. If I close my eyes,
I can almost forget.
I liked it, if only it wasn't true.

does this mean I was lying
when I said your happiness
is all that matters?

It could have been a lie,
but maybe if the other party would return the favor,
the friggin problem wouldn't exist right now would it...

[lostintheworld]

damn that stings a little.

okay, so I've typed three reviews, and they were all s**t...
so here goes attempt number four and I'm not deleting it...hahah so prepare for the worst and I'll hope for the best....

I love the flash of looking forward into the future and seeing
that you've been labled this phase someone went through
which is a huge fear in certain types of relationships.
My girlfriend and I always talk about past lovers being bisexual- and how it becomes a fear that your lover may choose to go back to the other....
it's weird though how I dont think most heterosexuals fear their lovers "turning" gay. We rarely call heterosexual love a phase- we might say it's a bad boy phase, or a strong man phase- but that isn'[t quite the same.
I dont really know how to say what i'm saying- so whatever, hopefully something came from that nonsense above...

But so...
um
yeah..
back to the flash. I feel it's a flash forward.
like somehow in your mind
it's there...
the possibility of your lover leaving
choosing the easier
path
choosing the relationship
everyone else can handle
and laughing at you
mocking you
and the way they
thought they were in love with you....
what a funny joke...
what a cruel realization to become the butt of someones joke.
An insecurity of sorts that is breeding.
In my opinion i see it as a sort of fear that grows from not being able to be fully "out"
it makes you questions the others true feelings.

the other part i particularly like is how the he is faceless. I think this shows it's not a jealousy of what the other person has, is, does etc...moreso just that it doesnt matter because she is with him and he is not you. It's not jealousy that's fueling this insecurity, it's something alltogether different.

Then my favorite-
does this mean i was lying...
damn those are the stinging lines i think.
We do want their happiness- but man does it have to hurt so much?
i cant even talk about it, cause its just too hard to put into words...


but
wow,
i love this poem.

[Emily B]

Yes, it probably does mean you were lying when you said that, but we won't tell. This is a monologue that should have been a conversation. You say the words silently aloud that you ache to say to her. Flashing moments triggered by a thought, a memory, forgetting that she's not there to share it with anymore. And then there's that conspirational 'I remember one time' kinda tugs at your heartstrings.

Raw emotions in a contained kind of way . . .

[Bubo]

Ouch
we both must be having one of those days.........I posted 10 mins ago.....and yes, being someone who was a
phase is very painful when it felt so real..........emotional piece, and one I think is a true account.