All These Pieces of Me

Just a little something I wrote the other day

All These Pieces of me

Nighttime sobs and broken whispers

Afraid. So afraid

Empty longings and darkened blurs

Alone. I’m so alone.

Starving on my food

Living on my hunger

Drowning in

All these pieces of me

Daytime laughs and false smiles

Empty, so empty

Impossible climbs and lonely miles

Tired. I’m so tired.

Laughing in pain

Crying in joy

No one can see

All these pieces of me

Gentle laugh and friendly eyes

Strong, so strong

Lifted chin between these lines

Fine. I’m fine.

Hating that I lie to you

And lying that I hate you

But can you fix

All these pieces of me?

Bleeding heart and hidden story

Hidden, so hidden

Looked safe, but was so deadly

Broken, you’re also broken

Made blind so I could see you

Deaf so I could hear you

Maybe I won’t hide

All these pieces of me

Calm seas and torrents of storm

But together, always together

Cold ice and fire so warm

And safe. We are safe.

My beautiful paradox

Flawed perfection

And I will love you with

All these pieces of me

Author's Note

Please give me any feedback or advice

Reviews

[Carol Phelan Aebby]

This is a beautiful write! I believe it could be lyrics to a song as I felt it singing as I read it. One cannot truly love another without first acquiring a love for self; an all embracing.

Wishing you continuous creativity and bliss!

With respect and admiration,
Carol Phelan Aebby

[GreenEyedPoet]

This is really beautiful! And it has a bit of a 'flow' to it, I like that!

[Coyote Poetry]

A amazing poem. I like the way you used the repetition. Create different places and thoughts in each paragraph. The poem had a very nice flow of thoughts and I liked how you led to the good ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Rachel Grace]

Thank you so much (: It quite different than a lot of stuff I've tried to write

[Coyote Poetry]

It was good and you are welcome.

[The StoryTeller]

This was beautiful... I don't think I could have put this into words any better. "My beautiful paradox" That's so true, our worlds are so backwards when we're living fake, when we're terrified of others and letting them see past our masks and we cry ourselves to sleep, all with so many horrible things going on in our life... Maybe that's just me and I'm reading too much into it, but that's my feel I got from this poem, and I've felt that before. Lots of times actually. Still do sometimes. Anyways, beautiful write. Send me a read request whenever you post something new. I want to keep up and read all of your work if it's this beautiful and true.

[Rachel Grace]

Thank you so much :) I will do that. Couldn't agree more. In fact, a lot of my writing deals with topics like this

[The StoryTeller]

No problem, and I'll be looking forward to your read requests and your work! And yeah, I kind of noticed. :) I guess we can relate... I mean, if you read some of my work, I think you'd think we feel the same way. Although from your work I get more of a confused spinning-world lost person vibe, and from mine I kind of get that, but I get a sense of overwhelming pain and lots of darkness... Lol, you probably don't care. Anyways, again, great write!

[Andrew Liddy]

This is really good. Its beautifully written in a style that captures the imagination, well done.

[Lizardo]

It is really good
I like how you add kind of title to every stanza ''All these pieces of me"
Good work!

[Karl Woof]

Paradox, oh, the beauty of innocence where people confuse darkness for light.
For the controller of the candle combats the shadow when all it has is the night.
Perfect child didn't know,
blinded by the seemingly mortal candle
was that this division may come and go.
A step back into ignorance of how it may or may not unfold.
Tempt yourself into a tea break once in awhile and let the tree of life mold.
How it may grow.

[Jonas]

This definitely is a great piece of writing. It struck this note of sadness in me, which I can't explain. Maybe working on the flow of the poem would make it even more striking, as now it's a bit chopped and jumpy.

[Jamestown]

Good job, this was well done, I enjoyed reading this and the title fits
perfect with the write and different stanzas, thanks for sharing.

[Pandora E.]

This is so beautiful, I adore how every stanza is ended in the same way yet it portrays such a different aspect in each one.