Gone to be Forgotten

This is my first ever poem. The poem focuses on how futile suicide can be to solve one's life problems and suffering since you not only ended life but a chance to change and instead to be forgotten.

There was this girl

who lived in the dark

Her presence was a blur

Her existence does not mark

 

She suffered alone from her mistake

Her cries of regret--never been heard

Sadly, people never cared for her sake

They threw mocks like children killing a bird

 

They laughed, they smirked, they judged

All her ridiculous pain and stained past

She was forced to plant too much grudge

And could not heal her brokenness with any cast

 

It was too much thus she left this world

Left with great courage and tons of regret

They discovered her heart aches--horrid and cold

After she left---all sufferings, no longer a secret

 

They mourned for her life and beg for amnesty

Prayed for her soul for peace in eternity

Years passed, they all forgot--such a pity

Gone was the vividness of her entity

Author's Note

Please tell me if I have any potential for poetry. I just wanted to try it. This is my very first, by the way. :-D
P.S. The digital art attached with this poem is made by me using Photoshop CS6 for coloring and background while the framework and artwork using paint. I hope I did this write. >.<
R.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

You can write and the poem is very good. You told a sad story about a life lived invisible and forgotten too soon. You put a lot into the short poem. Left the reader with something to think about. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Rea Sky]

Oh my! THAAAAANK YOU for such a very encouraging (descriptive and instructive too!) review! I am very veeeery enlightened and in giddy joy! Hahaha thanks sir! I shall continue poetry! :-D

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome. I enjoyed your poetry and thoughts.

[Michele Harman]

I like this one too. I will be honest Poetry is not my best area but I love reading it. You should really begin submitting both the one's i read to various places. You are really good at this.

[Rea Sky]

Oh my! Oh my! Thank you so much and much and munch xD I am so encouraged and inspired by your reviews! God bless you all! Thank you!

[Lenah Mehzabin]

Very gorgeous presentation of such a sad ,bullied, deeply hurt nd suffered girl .. a lot of loners lyk r daily murdered ,tortured nd when they die it nvr takes even a single day 4 us to frgt their name.. ..Beautiful poetry :)

[Rea Sky]

Yeeey glad you thought it's beautiful! :-D And your thought are just like mine! I am so happy that,my peom got into you! Thank you so so so so so much! ♥

[Lenah Mehzabin]

welcome... : )

[Lizardo]

This is really good, I really like it and the stuff that the poem transmit is good, I specially like last stanza
This is a good poem.

[Rea Sky]

:-D *dances around* Thank you giving my poem a part of your time! I am so glad you liked it. Thelast part is my favorite too! XD Teehee~♪ thank yoooou!

[NeiL ArandA]

Yes you are and yes you do . You are talking about someone or anobody who may have been atarget of bullying . This someone or muse decides to take matters into her own hands and end the pain . Funny things . Has this person had any friends that could have stood up beside her and defend her . Lonelines and being ostracized are two different things but both lethal if they bestowed in malicious tandem .
This is great piece with rooms for improvement .

[Rea Sky]

You're words are helping me so much to improve. (Since I don't have a very large vocabulary of deep words) XD OMG! Thank you for giving part of your time just to read my poem! Thank you so much for the very helpful encouragement! Thank you!

[Gee]

If you enjoy writing just keep putting your poems out there.My stuff is simple rhyming verse but there are some really good poets on here who you can learn from by simply reading their work.

[Rea Sky]

Oh you saw it. Yeah, I'm only able to make poems from rhyming and that's why I don't have the confidence to call this a real poem. XD Could you recommend me really good poets? Oh and thank you so much for reviewing and helping! :-D

[Gee]

I don't really take to much notice of names but if you flit in and out regularly the better poets are constantly getting reviewed,unlike the rest of us!Good luck.

[Rea Sky]

Oooh is that so? Thanks umm gee. XD same to you! I'm gonna chrck you poems too. (If you don't mind.) Thanks!

[Rea Sky]

I mean check. Not chrck. XD damn no edit button. Hahaha Best wishes to yah!

[Gee]

Lol,one last thing Solaris,make sure that what you write is written for you and not what you think others might want/like you to write.Have a great Xmas and New year.

[Amduscia]

You definitely have the potential to write Poetry. Very well done.

[Rea Sky]

WOW! really? You think so? XD Thank you so much for a really good encouragement! :-D
R.

[Amduscia]

I truly do. Honest opinion. Truly a pleasure. I enjoyed the realism within Your Poem.

[Rea Sky]

OMG! Thank you, sir! I think I'll continue working on my poetry. God bless yah! ;-)

[Amduscia]

Good luck with Your future Poetry works. Hope it goes well. Haha... And, God bless You, too.