03x27: The Christmas Bazaar

After the events of the precious chapter, Austin tries to cope with the pain ang realizes just how awesome CV is.

THE CHRISTMAS BAZAAR

 

     He was at the gates of Elizabeth Seton School. It has been approximately ten hours since Austin’s life lost its purpose.

     For the first time in a long time, he walked to the classroom. Near the sides of the ramp near the Guidance Office and the catwalk below the bridge were some stands being put up for the Christmas Bazaar. These stands extended to the CWS.

     He looked towards the CWS and noticed two things, one was how large it seemed during night time but how small it seemed during daytime. The other was although it seemed small, Austin could still pick out that small square where he and Janella danced the night away.

     He continued walking, seeing the catwalk inside the Mindanao Building where Austin and Janella had a lot of their conversations.

     He walked upstairs lazily, on the verge of tears but holding it back since he was in public.

     He sat down in his seat. Ibarra, AD, and Chili were already there in the room

     Austin put down his bags and went to AD since she was in Bukidnon last year and he really needed to talk to someone ASAP who knew what the hell was going on.

     Long story short, he told AD then Chili and Ibarra just couldn’t help but overhear.

     He went to SC to tell Clara, another Bukidnon student, “mother” of the Patola family, and one of the main Austin/Janella shippers.

     “Clara…” Austin said as she gestured her to come closer.

     “What is it?”

     “It’s over…”

     She looked around for potential eavesdroppers.

     “You don’t mean you and Janella, do you?”

     Austin nodded sadly, trying to hold the tears in.

     “Oh my… I’m so sorry.”

     “I felt it. I knew she was slipping away. I tried to save it but… I just… I don’t know… Let me get this straight, she broke my heart, I did nothing to break hers.”

     “I know. I know.”

     “I just… It just happened so fast… I don’t…”

     “It’s going to be okay.”

     “Well, of course it is, isn’t it? It’s always going to be okay when from experience, it never is… Look, I’m sorry. I’m just going to go upstairs to the Bukidnon room and try to relive the happy memories.”

     “You go do that. Maybe it’ll help.”

     Austin went up the stairs and went to the Bukidnon room. A few freshmen stared at him oddly and he noticed that he was tearing up slightly. He wiped away the tear as he saw the tarpaulin he and Janella put up together. It triggered a chain of memories leading to the farewell party where she rested her head on his shoulder and he felt her love like he made her feel his in that simple gesture.

     He rushed back downstairs, trying to stop the memories from flowing in as Sean arrived. Of course Austin had to tell him.

     Sean had become sort of an idol for Austin despite his shortcomings since everyone has those anyway.

     “That’s part of life, Austin. I’m not saying it would have happened sooner or later but that’s usually the case.”

     Austin plugged in his iPod and listened to their song, the song they danced to back in FS Night.

     “Dude, you aren’t listening to that song, are you?”

     He didn’t care. He let go and let the tears stream down his face. Well, strangely, he didn’t really feel like crying and it was more of just a single tear.

     “Come on, let’s talk,” Sean said.

     Austin lazily followed Sean to the balcony in front of DOR.

     “Look, Austin, these things need time to heal. I’m not telling you to get over it just like that but you have to go through the phases.”

      “What…”

     Sean told him some stuff that cheered him up a little.

      “Everyone experiences this in their lifetime. You just have to accept the fact. Other people can be worse off.”

     “Like Renz?”

     He had to channel his depression elsewhere.

     “Damn, that dude has been heartbroken since Day one, haha,’ Sean said.

     “And when he gets depressed, he might hang himself with a smile on his face.”

     “Oh, don’t put that image in my head.”

     “You know what, Sean? I think I’m okay for now.”

     “Really? Well, that’s good. Do you still talk to her?”

     “Yeah. She’s like a sister to me now.”

     “Good. You should never do away with your friendship.”

     “Agreed. I’m gonna go talk to her now.”

     “You go do that. I’ll be right here in this classroom.”

      Austin headed to the DDN classroom and his heart sunk when he saw Janella there. She saw him and her face was immediately tinged with the emotion of sadness.

     “Hey, beautiful,” he said.

     “What was up with that last text last night? You know you can still talk to me, right?”

     “Yeah. I was just feeling poetic.”

     “I’m really sorry.”

     “So how are you and him?”

     “We’re just friends.”

     “Oh. Well…”

     “Are you sure you’re okay?”

     “Yeah… yeah! I mean, you’re just like a sister now, right? Nearly nothing’s changed. If you need me, I’m right here.”

     “Thanks.”

     Austin was still obviously heartbroken since telling her this hurt him so much even though he meant it from the bottom of his heart.

     Ernst arrived and Austin greeted him a Happy New Year referencing a joke he made yesterday. This was just to mask the emotions when he told Bianca and Ernst about last night. Saying they were shocked would be an understatement.

     Recess was the only time Austin and Marise got to talk about the situation. She reacted a bit more sympathetically than the others, having possibly been there.

     Going off stream a little bit, Ms. Becky had this habit of checking students for their ID’s and sending them to Sr. Dan after a certain number of strikes. Among those who don’t have their ID’s very often were Sean, Jeffrey, and Jib.

     That Filipino class, the boys decided to fool Ms. Becky by taking off their ID’s. A few of the girls joined in as well and when Ms. Becky saw this, she treated it like a usual day, reprimanding them, not even being suspicious of whether it was a joke or not.

     Also, Jeffrey kept on unbuttoning his uniform, despite Ms. Becky’s reprimands. The thing they liked about Ms. Becky was that she’d reprimand countless times but won’t follow through most of the time.

     Even though these pranks were mean-spirited, Austin was desperate for any source of happiness and used this source.

     Also, the quote for that day was a joke in their Magazine for ZL:

     “Rey: Jeff! Jeff!

     Jeff: Oh, Rey?

     Rey: Jeff! Jeff!

     Jeff: Oh, Rey?”

     This was supposed to be the origins of a game in a Philippine game show called “Hep, Hep, Hooray.” Again, he was desperate for a smile.

     Marise also returned Scott Pilgrim, transferring it to Sean.

     During Lunch, Austin waited for DDN to be dismissed (their Biology teacher usually dismisses them late). He met up with Ernst and Bianca and they told him that Janella told Nica. She was shocked.

     Austin too, was shocked. Janella didn’t even tell her own best friend in DDN that she was crushing on someone else.

     In the Library, Austin sat in the same table as Janella, Nica, Ernst, and Bianca. He was moping about some trash can on the corner.

     “Alas, poor trash can. Thou rims be filthified with our trash that we�"“

     “Are you okay?” Bianca asked.

     “That be a stupid question but I shall answer it all the same. Of course I’m not okay! Do you have any idea what I went through last night? I went through a literal degradation of my sanity. That’s what heartbreak does to ya.”

     Nica nervously looked at Janella. Luckily, she was too engrossed in her novel. She nudged her and she snapped back reality.

     “What?”

     “Janella, did I tell you that you have beautiful eyes today… as usual?”

     “Ahihihi…” Nica said softly.

     Janella was obviously caught off guard by this comment.

     “You have no idea what I went through last night. I call it, the insert AC/DC song here.”

     “Iron Man?” Ernst asked.

     “Not Black Sabbath, you nimrod!”

     “Smells Like Teen Spirit?”

     “It’s Highway to Hell, you dumbass,” Bianca said.

     “You know? TO cope with my current state, I’m going to ship you two. The more you hate, the more you love right. You two are the perfect couple.”

     Austin saw Bianca and Ernst seriously contemplate a dive bomb.

     “And don’t even think of doing that in the library of all places.”

     As they walked out, Austin sadly approached Janella.

     “Janella… I’m sorry.”

     “Why?”

     “I lied to you. I’m not okay. I’m dying inside…”

     She seemed extremely flustered.

     “I knew I shouldn’t have told you.”

     “No. It’s good that you told me. I got ripped out of my fantasy and back into reality. That’s supposedly healthy.”

     When they got out of the IMU hallway, Joel was there, near the stairs.

     “No fighting you two. I’ll be back,” Janella said, heading into the restroom.

     “Hello, Joel…”

     “Austin, we already went through this.”

     “I’m not mad,’ Austin said in a very different tone. “Not mad at all.”

     “Oh…”

     “I want to thank you. You’re still my best friend.”

     “What am I saying? What the f**k am I saying? I feel like a schizophrenic. What the�"“

     “Without you, my life would be all epicness and no conflict. Being the movie buff, no conflict means boring movie. Thanks.”

     Janella got back out.

     “Anyway, see ya…” Joel said.

     They headed to their normal routes. Janella seemed regretful as she headed back to her classroom.

    

Science time was next and Austin was missing a seatmate. Kristina was also missing. It was later revealed that the TWP had a little talk with Sr. Geck but a plothole was now revealed: Pat isn’t in the TWP, why was she late. The answer? Austin didn’t care.

     They did show up eventually.

     “Why are you late?” Sr. Jojo asked.

     “Sr. Geck talked to us,” Kristina said.

     “TWP?”

     “Yes, sir.”

     “You’re happy there?”

     “Yes, sir.”

     “Okay. Good… Just be careful not to get into gang fights.”

     The class chuckled at this.

     “Pat, you’re in the TWP?”

     “No, sir.”

     “So what are you part of? The… PWT?”

     The class laughed at this because PWT was one letter short from “pwet” which was “butt” in tagalog. Immaturity, commence.

     Out of nowhere, Chili and Aika began crying.

     “Chili, Aika, what’s wrong?”

     They shook their heads, claiming that nothing was wrong. Sr. Jojo then noticed Sang Woo, confused.

     “Sang Woo, are you okay?”

     “Yes, sir.”

     “You have gang fights in Korea, right?”

     He hesitantly nodded.

     “In Korea, you have gang fights. In the Philippines, we have… gang… rape?”

     This definitely cheered Chili and Aika up. Things were looking a bit brighter.

     During Music time, they had a long test. Sr. Chris decided to make it right minus wrong, Crisostomo Aguda style.

     If you answer a question and it is wrong, it is deducted from your total score but if you leave it blank, it is not deducted.

     Austin finished the test and spent the rest of the time in depression.

     The last big laugh of the day was when they called Micherenz and Bettina “Bloomers” due to them being from Bloomfield.

     During Guidance class, they had to draw “The ideal Christmas celebration.” Austin was too depressed to focus properly.

     He sat in front of Mo-on and Rica who were sitting beside each other.

     “What’s wrong with you, Austin?” Mo-on asked.

     “Don’t you know? Janella just broke up with me last night. Well, technically she can’t do that since we were never on in the first place but yeah, nonetheless, I am heartbroken.”

     “Oh.”

     “How do things like that happen? You love someone with every cell in your body, every piece of your mind, every breath of your soul and the next day, poof, it’s gone, nice knowing ya.”

      “I know what you mean,” Rica said.

     “And it would be half okay if it was anyone but Joel. Fate has to roundhouse kick me in the balls and make her end up with Joel!”

     “No really?!” Mo-on said. “Joel?”

     Every time Austin and Mo-on would watch a movie, he would rant on the side about how much he loathed Joel.

     “Yes… she chose Joel.”

     “F**k!” Mo-on exclaimed. Luckily, Ms. Kit was on the other side of the room.

     Austin marched to the DDN room after classes to wait for Janella. She went out and saw him.

     “Janella, would you mind if I walked with you?”

     “No. Not at all.”

     Austin walked with her to the waiting area.

     “Janella, I’m sorry.”

     “Why?”

     “Look at me! I’m being such a loser. I’m not being such a loser, I always was, still am, and always will.”

     She remained silent.

     “I have to tell you a secret. Ever since I was in fourth grade, I never cried due to sadness… Well, not counting all the times I forced myself to shed a tear at Titanic... but I never cried due to real life dilemmas. I only ever cried when I was too angry. I now admit that there were two exceptions.”

     “And what are those?”

     “The first was last year, day before the final quarterly tests.”

     “I remember…”

     “Second was last night…”

     There was now an uncomfortable silence between them.

     They remained silent until they reached the few steps before the Business Office. There were more stands being put up here so they had to watch their step.

     Austin decided to break the silence.

     “Janella…”

     Austin stopped, forcing Janella to stop too. He looked her in the eye. He hated himself that it took these terrible circumstances for him to say this.

     “I still love you…”

     Inside, he was laughing at the irony. A few weeks back, he couldn’t say “I love you” in a sad tone and here he was, right now, saying it.

     She kind of look regretful and hurt after he said this. He knew her well enough to know that she was thinking the same thing as she said earlier. “I shouldn’t have told you…”

     They were back uncomfortable silence as they went the remaining distance to the waiting area.

     When they reached the waiting area, Janella finally spoke.

     “You better go home…”

     “Why?”

     “So you can cry already. It’s better to release your feelings than to keep them in.”

     “I’ve done my fair share of crying. I want to spend some time with you, talk about this.”

     She placed her things in her bus and stepped out.

     “When did it die?”

     “What?”

     “When did your crush on me go away?”

     She hesitated to tell him.

     “I think around September or October…”

     “Oh… About Joel, why him?”

     “I don’t know. I text him all the time and he’s just… funnier.”

     A bus mate of hers went in to place her bags and teasingly smiled at them.

     They spoke for a while longer until Austin couldn’t take it anymore. He just wanted to rewind back to sixth grade.

     “I think you better go.”

     “Wait, Janella. I have two more questions. First and foremost, now can you tell me your favorite movie?”

     Technically, he wanted to know whether this was a major loss in terms of interests.

     “Fine… I guess… hmm… Tinkerbell?”
     Austin was relieved. If she answered Back to the Future or Star Wars, he would’ve been totally devastated.

     “Why that one?”

     “I don’t know. It’s just cool and stuff.”

     “Okay. Second question. Am I boring?”

     She hesitated to answer this one.

     “Umm… kinda…” she said with a tone that said “I’m sorry…”

      “Well, that’s obvious. Anyway, see ya…”

      “Bye…”

     Austin teleported to the school in the city and headed for a tricycle to his old home. Then he saw something odd, CV was on the second floor of the Sanglayon Building (It had glass windows).

     He rushed upstairs for some company and sure enough, they were there.

     “Austin! Hey!” Marise said.

     “Hi. Is this for the Congo?”

     “Obviously, haha. How are you doing?”

     “Fine. I just talked to her for a few minutes.”

     “And?”

     “Can you believe it? I’ve been living a lie for two, maybe three months!”

     “What do you mean?”

     “She said that her crush on me died around September or October.”

     “Man, that sucks. I should know…”

     “HI AUSTIN!” Mo-on said.

     “Hey!” Austin replied, giving him a high-five.

     “How are you doing?”

     Austin told him about the “living a lie for two or three month thing.”

     “That’s can’t be. She told us before the FS Night… well, we asked her actually and she said that yeah, she still had a crush on you.”

     “And that time when I caught her in the waiting area, when she confirmed that you two were still, you know. That was October too,” Marise said.

      “Obviously, she lied. She lied to all of us. She didn’t even tell Nica or Bianca, two of her closest friends in DDN. What boggles me is why she said yes to me in the first place for the FS Night.”

     “ALRIGHT GUYS! BACK TO POSITION!” Maan said.

     “Talk to you later, Austin,” Marise said.

     “Yeah, we gotta beat an empty Guioguio with a handle of a broom or something like that,” Mo-on said.

      “Haha. Good luck with that.”

     Austin bought a vanilla ice cream cone from the ice cream stand nearby and sat down next to Maan.

     “Hey, Austin.”

     “Hey, Maan. Like the comfort food? This ice cream is delicious!”

     “I know, right? Anyway, what happened?”

     “Long story. To put it shortly, Janella and me, it’s gone.”

     “Oh… I’m so sorry.”

     “I just can’t believe that… damn, this ice cream is delicious!”

     Deep inside, he knew that he was in the first state of grief, denial.

     “I think we agreed on that already.”

     “Yeah. I got to talk to her and she said that she lost her interest during September or October. That means when I danced with her, it was gone.”

     “Aww…”

     “Damn, I gotta try the Strawberry flavor. Brb.”

     Austin stood up and finished off his current cone as he bought a Strawberry flavored ice cream cone.

     “Hey, we’re finished,” Marise said.

     “How’s the empty Guioguio?”

     “Beaten, I guess,” Mo-on said.

     “Anyway, thanks for the time. I’d appreciate it if we kept this to ourselves.”

     “Sure,” Mo-on said.

     “Of course,” Marise said.

     “Bye. See ya tomorrow.”

 

The next day was technically a practice day for the Congo. That was the priority but if the teacher wants to teach, it was fine.

     Austin decided to make a quote of the day, just for the heck of it. He chose one that expressed what he wanted to say, to everyone and to himself, despite being a repeat.

     “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.”

     Since Marise was (probably) the only one of his classmates to have seen Moulin Rouge, she was one who welcomed the repeat.

     Others didn’t notice the repeat since last time it was used; it wasn’t exactly a “quote of the day” yet. Sean liked it and that was enough.

     Around the fourth period, Sr. Jojo and Ms. Mac watched them rehearse. Austin was free so he told Ms. Mac about it. She gave him some advice that boiled down to one thing, “Wallow in depression.”

      Austin built up a habit of self-deception and seeing that the first stage of grief is denial, his was especially bad. Ms. Mac advised him not to deny it. It would be one step closer to acceptance.

     The Bazaar was also now officially open. Austin, Bianca, and Ernst looked around it for a while.

     Bianca and Ernst continued bickering during the trip.

      “Despite your gargantuan chin, we’re still alive and that’s a miracle!”

     “Despite your gargantuan ego, I’m still here, beside you and Austin!”

     “Despite your gargantuan crush on Maan, you still haven’t made a move yet.”

      “Despite your… umm… despite… ****!”

     “Hey! Despite your arguing, I believe you two actually love each other. For the love of my aching heart, just kiss already, d****t!’ Austin said angrily.

     “That is false!” Ernst said.

     Austin turned his hands into a heart shape and put Ernst and Bianca into the frame. The two of them nearly vomited as they stormed off in opposite directions.

      When TEAGS sat down for Lunch, there were two missing. Austin, desperate for attention, called out to Nica and Janella. Why Nica? To make it less conspicuous. Like that would help…

     “Hey! Janella! Nica!”

     “WHAT?!” Nica asked.

     “Look at our table, who’s missing?”

     Janella and Nica analyzed the given problem for a few seconds.

     “Ernst and Bianca…”

     “Ever wonder where they are?”

     “Oh crap,” Nica said, teasing smile initiated.

     “Hey, where are Ernst and Bianca? Are they?” Mo-on said as he passed by.

     “Maybe.”

     They went back to the Bazaar afterwards. Austin stayed with Ivan. Soon, they saw Bianca chasing Mo-on.

     “You can’t catch me!” Mo-on said.

     “Turn me back, Mo-on!” Bianca said.

     “What’s going on?” Austin asked.

     “Mo-on accused me of having a scandal with Ernst earlier so I chased him and he increased gravity’s pull on me, making it harder to run. Was that enough exposition for you?”

      “No, please, elaborate some more.”
      “HAHA! WOO HOO!” Mo-on said, running around Bianca.

      “Come back here.”

      “Bianca, you do know who hinted at the scandal right?”

      Bianca thought about this for a while, finally connecting the dots.

      “COME HERE YOU!”

     “Austin! Tag team!” Mo-on said as he pointed his finger at Austin. “JUMP!”

      Austin did as told and he floated as if he were on the moon.

     “Ah, forget it,” Bianca said, sitting down in Austin’s seat.

     “Hey!”

 

All the sections rounded up in the FBA Auditorium for the final (and also general) rehearsal for the Congo before the presentation on Monday.

     “Austin, I need a favor,” Ymara said.

     “Anything.”

     “Go to Sanglayon and reserve the top floor for CV,” Mo-on said.

     “What he said,” Ymara added.

     “On my way.”

     Austin teleported to Sanglayon and saw that it was empty. He teleported through the locked doors and a guy went towards him.

      “Sorry kid, Sanglayon’s closed.”

     “Oh, ok. Thanks.”

     He teleported back to the school and looked for the Ice Cream machine, he couldn’t find it.

     On his way back, he saw Sr. Edmond and got the urge to talk him. He was, after all, his former adviser.

     “Austin, how are you and Janella?” Sr. Edmond asked in a sympathetic tone rather than his usual teasing tone. This relieved Austin because he knew that Sr. Edmond knew what was up.

     “Well, it’s gone…”

     “Take a seat.”

     The talk was mostly about moving on but Austin couldn’t really focus since he was too depressed. One thing that caught his attention was the following:

     “You’re not the only one affected you know? Janella’s affected too. Did you know that she failed her last seatwork miserably?”

     This was the final straw for Austin. She can break his heart but he was not going to be the cause of her failure.

     Austin and Sr. Edmond finished their talk and he headed back to the FBA Auditorium.

     “I have bad news and horrible news. Bad news is, Sanglayon’s closed.”

     “Horrible news?”

     “The ice cream isn’t there.”

     “It’s in the Bazaar! Where do we practice now?”

      “We can use the Base,” Austin said.

     “Too crowded…” Ymara said.

     “My house?” Rica said.

     “Even w�"“

     “I mean the street.”

     “Oh. Okay then…”

     While waiting for something good to happen, Austin saw Janella and Joel sitting beside each other, acting like the best of friends, having fun together. Oddly, he didn’t feel as hurt as he expected. He was happy for her and he thought to himself, “This is good. I’m getting closer acceptance…”

     After everything was done, Austin passed by the DDN room and offered to tutor Janella in Math. Just like old times, she refused.

     They took the portal to Sanglayon to go to Rica’s house. He caught up with Mo-on, Rica, and Sr. Jojo.

     Sr. Jojo found out about the heartbreak and asked him about it. He told him about earlier where he didn’t get hurt.

     “It’s like Casablanca. I want her to be happy.”

     “Aww…”

     Sixty, Fifty-nine, Fifty-Eight…

     “Joven, where are the others?” Sr. Jojo asked.

     “Still back there.”

     “Leave your bags here for the moment.”

     Forty-nine, Forty-eight…

     They went to the portal under Sanglayon again and it turns out, Ms. Mac reserved them the back part of the canteen. It was a big and breezy space.

     Twenty-six, Twenty-five…

     Austin and Mo-on were tasked to call all the others who were headed towards Rica’s house to turn back. They also took Joven with them to get their bags back.

     On the way there, Joven stopped for some drinks.

     Three, Two, One…

     “Who am I kidding?! I’m not over it! How can I be over it?!”

     “Whoa, Austin. Calm down!”

     “I can’t lose her, Mo-on. I love her. I just can’t. I couldn’t bear to… I just. I… I…”

     “Breathe! Joven, hurry up!”

     They made their way to Rica’s house. There was no CV students headed there so they got their bags went back to the school.

     Sr. Jojo and Ms. Mac helped them get their game on with the recitation. Sr. Jojo provided many needed laughs, sending Patricia Agbayani into a laughing fit that made her look possessed.

     Austin tried to leave at around 5:30 PM but just couldn’t leave his family behind. He tried again at 6 PM but still couldn’t. Despite not being part of the speech choir, he was still having fun.

     “Okay guys. One last run, then we can eat,” Sr. Jojo said.

     They were still chattering.

     “Guys, one last! Then we can EAT!”

     Chattering… Chattering…

     “GUYS! ONE LAST RUN SO WE CAN EAT! I’M STARVING!!!!!” Mo-on yelled.

     The entire class erupted into laughter as Froilan stood up and went out the exit to the Motorpool.

     “Where is he going?” Ms. Mac asked.

     Froilan didn’t even look back and just disappeared.

     “Fine, let’s go guys!” Sr. Jojo said.

     They began one last run before Froilan came back around, entering from the Canteen side.

     After that, they had a break. Austin went with Basti, Mo-on, Marise, and Kristina to the Inflatable ride.

     “Let’s ride in there,” Kristina said.

     “You sure?” Marise asked.

     “I think I’m okay now. It’s on and off really,” Austin said to Mo-on.

     “Oh yeah, Austin. How are you?” Kristina asked.

     “Fine. I guess.”

     “I saw them together earlier. It really is true…” Marise said.

     “I know right? Despite one little outburst, I am pretty much okay now.”

     “I was there…” Mo-on said.

     Austin sat down with Ymara, Maan, Justine, and Mo-on in the canteen. Ymara was eating S’mores.

     “Hey, that looks good,” Austin said.

     “It is. Want one?”

     “Sure.”

     Austin took one s’more from Yara’s plate and took a bite. The first thought that went into his head was “WOW! Another comfort food!”

     “How’s your situation?”

     “Occasional Depression, other than that. I’m fine.”

     “Don’t worry about the s’more. And don’t worry about your problem. Just eat it off with some s’mores,” Ymara said.

     “That is excellent food,” Justine said.

     “I wholeheartedly agree!” Austin exclaimed.

     “You can buy more over there,” Ymara said.

     “Thanks… S’MORES!”

     Austin rushed to the S’mores stand and bought four pieces. He ate them all with delight.

     They finished off the practices as Austin headed home.

     That night, Austin made one of the dumbest/smartest choices he has ever made. He watched (500) Days of Summer again.

     While watching it, he can’t help but notice that it was basically his life on film… except for the shower and the park and the IKEA scenes. For the first time, he actually cried in the movie.

     He used to hate the ending but now, he loved it. It gave him hope that one day, he will find his Autumn.

 

The next day was a Saturday. Austin had nowhere to go so he went with some other Sophomores to watch a Filipino version of The Prodigal Son in SM Southmall.

     Austin rode the bus and was alone in his seat.

     “Hey, Austin!” Marise said.

     Austin turned around and she was in the seat across from the one behind him.

     “Hey, I guess you’re watching too.”

     “I guess you guessed right.”

     “Haha…”

     Austin had the random urge to sit beside her and just talk but he though that the empty seat beside her meant she was waiting for someone.

     Then, two things happened:

     The first was that Glen Comendador, Janella’s seatmate, sat beside him.

     The second one was, Janella texted him.

     “Why is it that when I see the teddy bear you gave me, I become sad?”

     “Maybe you just miss that time. The time of innocence…”

     “Yeah.”

     “You okay?”

     “Yeah”

     “You and Joel were sweet yesterday :-P”

     “Oh so you’re teasing now, eh?”

     “Hehe. :-)”

     “I guess you really are okay. Are you?”

     “I don’t know anymore :-( You were so happy with him. That’s all I want :-)”

     “You sure? Sorry.”

     “One question, if I may. Were you really happy yesterday?”

     “Yeah.”

     “Then I’m happy as well. :-) We had our time. Enjoy your life :-) We’re still friends anyway :-)”

     “You want me to keep my distance from him for a while?”

     “It’s ok. If you want. It’s up to you. As long as you’re happy.”

     She didn’t reply for a while. Austin decided to say something rather rash.

     “You know what? Joel’s real lucky.”

     “Why is he lucky?”

     “The best girl in the world likes him…”

     “Not really…”

     “Don’t be modest. You’re the best!”

     “Are you sure you’re okay?”

     “Not really. My mind says yes, my heart says no…”

     “I think it’ll take you a long time to move on…”

     “Of course. You’re the most important person to me.”

     They watched the play which was pretty good. Austin, Johan, and Glen were now shipping Ernst with an actor from the play named Fidel and a stereotypical homosexual-esque character from the play named Trudis.

     “Seton, line up,” Sr. Martin said. He always referred to them collectively as Seton. Sese, who came with, remarked softly, “Seton isn’t here.”

     “Sese, magkatabi nanaman kayo!” Sr. Martin said (Sese, you two are beside each other again). He was referring to him and Chili.

     “Sir, Napa?” Sese sarcastically asked, eliciting laughter from the audience.

    

On the way back, Sean texted him:

     “S**t man. Scott Pilgrim’s story is so inspiring.”

     “Haha… I know man.”

     He then sent a group message:

     “I still feel sad even with all the laughter… Who’s at the bazaar?”

     But like the good friend he was, Kyle asked what the hell was going on.

     “Why are you sad Austin?”

     “I forgot. I haven’t told you yet…

 

     She chose Joel…”

     “Oh mother… What happened?”

     “She just asked me if she could ask me a question. I said sure. She asked what if she liked someone else. It soon ended with Joel’s name in my face”

     “Oh… Austin. There are more fish in the sea?”

     “My mind says let go but my heart says hold on…”

     “Life goes on sadly. She’s just not the one…”

     “Wanna go to Seton?”

     “I can’t. I’m kinda busy right now.”

     “Oh. Too bad. Anyway, see you some other time.”

     When they got back, Austin hung around in the bazaar for a while. He saw Sr. Jojo on the bridge. He bought some s’mores and headed up there.

     “Hey, Austin!” Maan said.

     “Hi. What’s going on?”

     “We’re making the costumes, “Justine said.

     “Austin, how are you?”

     “Well, happy now that I’m with you guys.”

     Justine pointed his thumb at Renz and mouthed “Renz?” before retracting and acting as if nothing happened. Renz did catch this.

     “Just kidding, Renz. Take it easy!”

     “And the icing on the cake is that, frankly sir, you are hilarious.”

     “Oh really? I like this guy,’ Sr. Jojo said.

     They had a few good laughs until Sr. Jojo diverted his attention to the performances downstairs, in front of the chapel.

     “They’re really good, aren’t they?” Sr. Jojo said

     “Austin, how are you doing?” Ms. Mac asked.

     “Fine, so far. Thanks for the advice yesterday, miss.”

     “No problem.”

     “I wish I could sing like that. HAHA!” Sr. Jojo said.

     “They’re like MYMP, aren’t they?”

     SNAP!

     “MYMP performed the song Janella and I danced to during FS Night! This is unacceptable. I can’t believe this is happening. Why is this happening to me? I did everything I could and �"“

     “Austin, um… Austin?”

     “It’s not fair! It’s not fair! Not fair! NOT FAIR AT ALL!”

     “Austin? That’s enough.”

     “Sorry, sir. I’m just…”

     “We understand,” Ms. Mac said.

     “Justine, Maan, you guys can handle this, right? Ms. Mac and I have to go to the faculty center.”

     “We’ll hide them in the room?”

     “Yes.”

     “Okay, sir.”

     “Bye!” They said in unison.

    

Austin headed downstairs and spoke with Sean, Jolo, Luis, Enriko, and Bruce.

     “And in the end, he meets Autumn. Why can’t my life be that simple?”

     “It hurts, doesn’t it?” Bruce asked.

     “Of course it does.”

     “So, how was the play?” Jolo asked.

     “It was okay. Wasn’t it, Austin?” Enriko asked.

     “Yeah. I just want Autumn to come already.”

     “Hate to break it to you but we’re in tropical areas. There isn’t any Autumn here,” Enriko said.

     They laughed at this.

     “Good one but seriously, I’m a lover, not a fighter. Mock me if you want but I don’t care if I’m a nerd; I can love and… and… listen to this! I sound like a fa… d****t! I’m getting some s’mores.”

     “They closed down for the day, dude,” Sean said.

     “You checked?”
     “Yeah.”

     “That’s convenient. Anyway, I’ll just be on my way, see you guys…”

 

When he got home, Janella texted him again.

     “Hi...”

     “I don’t know what’s happening to me. Sometimes, I’m ok. Sometimes, I’m way too depressed. I think it’s because I miss you but you don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to. If you need me, I’m right here.”

He randomly asked her the percentage thingy she asked him a while back. She only answered 50% which meant “like a sibling”. He didn’t reply with his current percentage since he frankly didn’t know.

     She also continued to claim that she and Joel were only friends.

     He finally got the guts to ask her the question that has been bugging him since Wednesday.

     “Back in FS Night, did you still have a crush on me?”

     It took a while… He followed up.

     “Just answer that question and I’ll shut up for as long as you want me to. Please.”

     She did reply after a while.

     “… No.”

     “Ok. Thanks for the answer. I really appreciate it. :-)”

     “Sorry.”

     “So when you asked me the percent thingy on October 31 and I asked you the same thing, you lied? You said 90 percent. Was that real? The truth? A lie? Or was it something else?”

     90% was “You’re special to me”

     “Truth. You’re special because you’re always there for me.”

     “I still love you, Janella…”

     “It’s ok. I’m the one who has to apologize.”

     “You meant everything to me. No matter how many times people told me to save some love for myself, I never listened. Even you told me that. I gave you my all. You were the reason why I felt complete.

     “Recollection came and I was introduced to a term called infatuation. From that day on my biggest fear was that what I had for you was just infatuation, puppy love, or worst, lust. The ideas gave me nightmares but I had to live with it.

     “Every waking moment, I was haunted by the fact that what I felt for you wasn’t real. Then the best day of my life came, when you agreed to be my partner in the FS Night.

     “That night, I couldn’t sleep. I felt this weird feeling for the first time. They say no one knows what love is, you’ll just know it when you feel it. That feeling I felt that night was the best feeling I ever felt. It was better than any little movie I had been moved by. That night, I didn’t even care about movies because, well, that feeling consumed me. When the night finally came, I thought”

    The space was inadequate but she replied anyway with an emotionless:

     “Ok.”

     “of only one thing, how much you meant to me. That feeling in March, when I first said I loved you was nowhere near my feeling that night.

    “When I finally danced with you, that feeling was stronger than ever. But I noticed something wrong with you that night. You weren’t in the moment. I couldn’t think of any reason why…”

     “I really don’t think you’re ok.”

     “So the days went by and that feeling was stuck with me. I loved you so much. I would’ve done anything for you. I called you beautiful but it made me sad that you denied it.

     “Then this week, when Bianca told me, I thought that she was stretching the truth a little. When you said that you won’t be shy with me, I was happy. Then night came. After nine months of being ‘tough’ and fourteen year of sleeping properly, I had to cry myself to sleep.

     “It just got worse when I found out that the best night of my life was a lie. I thought I could move on. When I saw you with him in the auditorium and I saw you happier than you ever were with me, it hurt but it made me happy for you. I thought I could move on then but this brings us to the present.”

     “Sorry.”
     “Switching to present tense now, for the first time in my life, I don’t know what to do. I’m happy that the love of my life is happy, even with my best friend but it hurts.

     “Before I met you, my life was meaningless. As Nica probably told you, I was an a*****e. But you changed my life. You made me want to be a better person. You gave my life form, meaning, substance. You meant the world to me.

     “I just wanted to let you know. Sorry if I disturbed you. I just want you to know that you are the love of my life, then, now, and always.”

     His insane state had returned, only this time, he had no fever. He forgot all about the Mastermind, the conflict, to him, only this mattered now.

     “If it really means something to you, I won’t talk to him for a while.”

     “Do you think it’s true that love drives people mad?”

     “If you love someone, set her free. Is she comes back, she’s yours. If not, it was never meant to be…”

     “Please forgive my madness. I guess I’m just the boring, ugly, stupid nerd who fell in love with the awesome, beautiful, and nice girl. It ends unrequited, just like the movies. I’ll shut up now. Sorry I ruined your day.

     He realized what he had done and texted her again a bit later.

     “Hey, I’m sorry. My insane side acted up again. You going to sleep yet?”

     “No.”

     “You mad at me?”

     “No… it’s okay.”

     “Hey Janella. You’re still the best. :-) Good night, sweet dreams.”

    

The next day was special because it was a special advanced screening for an indie film produced in the school called Senior Year.

     Austin had nothing better to do than wallow in his depression so he decided to wallow in a place where depression… could be fun. Who knows?

     He went to the school via the Anonymous because nothing says emo like driving around in a black car (he changed the color scheme).

     He went near the trellis where his classmates were practicing.

     “Hey Austin. How are ya doing?” Ymara asked.

     “Fine, I guess.”

     “Hey, Austin!” Mo-on said.

     “Yo. Umm… I’m gonna buy some popcorn. Be right back.”

     Austin gloomily walked to the popcorn stand and bought some cheese flavored popcorn. He went back and watched their rehearsals.

     After another run, Arianne asked the question everyone has been asking.

     “Austin, how are you?”

     Then he diverted his attention to her shirt which displayed Jessie from Toy Story. Three… two… one…

     “I’m not okay! Look at your shirt! She friggin' wore that costume during the FS Night. Sure, it wasn’t 100% accurate but still, I danced with my cowgirl and now I’m a lone ranger in the Nevada Desert!”

     “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Arianne said, turning around to hide the shirt.

     “Are there deserts in Nevada?” Renz asked.

     “Anything we can do to make you feel better?” Maan asked.

     “No. I’m sorry. I’m slowing down your rehearsals. I shouldn’t have come. I’m going to go now.”

     “NO! It’s okay. We understand. Don’t worry; you’re not screwing anything up.”

     “Thanks guys. Really. I think I’m okay now,” he said, following the same pattern he has been following for the past eighty-seven hours, which he noticed.

     “Wait, Maan, sorry to interrupt despite you saying I’m not interrupting but are you listening to my pathetic-ness?!”

     “Is there such a word as pathe�"“ Renz began.

     “Dude, I’m talking here!”

     “Sorry…”

     “DUDE! Back to what I was saying. I just said that I’m okay and inside, I am but wait a few minutes or, if I’m unlucky, seconds and I’ll be depressed again. Wait a few more minutes and I’m okay, and depressed, and okay AD INFINITUM! I’M TIRED OF IT! Jeez, just knock me out, put me in a coma, I don’t care, I hate this mood whiplashing. I want fricking peace of mind! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO FRICKIN ASK?!”

    “Actually, you didn’t interrupt anything because they’re on break but I know you’re confused right now but just know, you’ll make it through this, and we’ll be with you,” Ymara said.

     “Thanks guys, I think I’m a lot better.”

     “Maan, about the costumes…” Arianne said.

     “OH ****, JESSIE! WHY’D YOU HAVE TO LEAVE ME ALONE?! My goodness, I feel like one of those jerks from a disgustingly disgusting rom-com who just got heartbroken, spouting cheesy lines. I’m gonna go get some drinks to wash this s**t out. D****t!”

     “I’m sorry…” Arianne said, speechless.

 

After the break, they had one more run and were free to go. Austin revealed his agenda two nights ago.

     “In that state? Dude, you’re either crazy or you just know what you’re doing.”

     “It just felt like the right moment to rewatch that movie. I can totally relate.”

     “So, have you found your Autumn yet?”

     “Nope. I’m not ready, I guess. And if I’m going to find Autumn, I’m gonna wait until I’m positive I’m ready. I don’t want to use someone for the sole purpose of moving on. I know if someone used me to move on, I’d be devastated.”

     “Good thinking. Anyway, you gonna watch Senior Year?”

     “Maybe. I’m not sure.”

     “Well, I am. See ya later.”

     “Bye.”

     He sat around for a while, eating barbecue and drinking orange soda when Mo-on came to him.

     “Hey, Austin. Wanna have lunch?”

     “Sure. Wanna watch Empire Strikes Back later?”

     “Yeah but I have to go somewhere so we might not finish it.”

     “It’s okay.”

    “Are you okay?”

     “Pretty much. Yeah. Why?”

     “You and Sean seem pretty tight these days, huh?”

     “He’s been there. And he’s the coolest guy I know. He’s the epitome of zero to… well not hero but you know what I mean. Well theoretically he wasn’t a zero he was more of a two point five but�"“
     “I get what you’re trying to say, dude. Anyway, I got you this.”

     Mo-on handed him an orange rubber ring.

     “You could’ve gotten a red one.”

     “Well first of all, it was free with the drink so, yeah. Secondly, the red one says ‘courage’ and I think you need that more.”

     Austin looked at the inscribed text: “HAPPINESS”. Austin felt like Mo-on was messing with him.

     “I could’ve used some courage.”

     “Come on, in your state, you gotta smile a little.”

     “Fine, thanks for the Happiness Ring.”

     Austin slipped in on his right ring finger.

     “It’s not working, not even via placebo effect.”

     “It’ll work in time. It’s better than those power balances. Anyway, shall we go?”

     “What about Senior Year? Are you gonna watch?”

     “Depends, are you?”

     “Yeah, I guess.”

     “Sure, I’ll watch. Are you watching with someone?”

     “Not really. Maybe kambal.”

     “But she’s part of the Chamberwinds. You sure she’ll make it. They’re gonna perform later.”

     “I guess. Anyway, let’s go.”

     Austin and Mo-on went in the Anonymous which he drove up to the third floor which had the cinemas.

     They watched the first half of Empire before he had to go. Then, once again, Austin was alone.

     Austin was desperate for anything to cheer him up in this moment of turmoil and like a gleaming star shining from his movie collection, he grabbed the DVD of Singin’ in the Rain and popped it right in.

     He watched in joy for the next one and a half hour, witnessing a movie that not only cheered him up but inspired him to actively begin his “getting over” phase.

      On that day at 1:12 PM, he vowed to avoid sadness at all costs. The ring has finally done its job.

    

He headed to the school in the Anonymous to meet up with Mo-on. The performances had already begun.

     He saw Clutch seated near the front and he went with him. Sean and Jasvir were also there.

     There were a few special performances like Sr. Dhani, Ms. Laurice, and last but not least, Sr. Chris and his Minstrels led by Jenice Medina.

     This made Clutch extra happy as he took his SLR camera for a photoshoot.

     “Why don’t you go in front?” Austin asked.

     “Nah…” Clutch said.

     “Just a small town girl… Living in a lonely world… Took the midnight train going anywhere…”

     This song sounded familiar to Austin but as far as he knew, he has never heard it before.

     “Hey, Clutch. What song is this?”

     “I know it’s from Glee.”

     This was the biggest clue. He recognized it immediately as Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing.

     This was technically the first time he heard the entire song. He instantly loved it.

     “Hey guys!” Mo-on said, making his grand entrance.

     “Nice to see you made it. What took you so long?”

     “My reason for leaving early? Red herring, they just wanted me to do some stuff. I’m here now. Where’s the ticket booth?”
     “There, near the FBA,” Sean said.

     “So you’re watching?” Austin asked.

     “Yeah.”

    “Did you buy your tickets already?”

     “Nope.”

     “Come on, let’s buy our tickets,” Mo-on said.

     Unfortunately, they only got the back seats but it was still good.

     After a while, they finally got in the theater after a purchase of popcorn and orange soda.

     While buying popcorn, Mo-on called some notice to something trivial.

     “Hey Austin, did you see Bianca?”

     “Nope. She’s here?”

     “Yeah. She fixed her hair up and was like hiding it from me. Of course I gave her the teasing look.”

     “Of course. What did she look like?”

     “Straight hair, I think she had make up. Ernst would be proud.”

     “Yes, he would be. Anyway, let’s get to the movie.”

     It was a pretty entertaining movie, especially the setting of “St. Fredrich’s Academy” which was their school technically.

     Austin, Mo-on, Sean, and Marise (who was in the same screening) made some comparisons between the ending of the film and Micherenz’s life, which were very easy.

     Austin, Sean, and Mo-on looked around in the Bazaar a bit, seeing a few kids playing with some fake snow. They were tempted to purchase some.

    IN the same stand, Austin was looking around some odd 1x3x3 Rubik’s Cubes when Mo-on nudged sean.

     “Dude, don’t look back,” Sean said.

     “Why?”

     Austin took the Schmuck Bait and looked behind him. There she was, the girl of his dreams, walking through the bazaar and yet, he was not only overjoyed but also devastated by her presence.

     He didn’t know whether to smile or to teleport back to the hotel and temporarily murder himself but he was definitely confused.

     “I told you not to look!” Sean said.

     “Well, you should’ve stressed the reason!”

     “Shoot, guys, I gotta go,” Mo-on said.

     “Sure. See ya on Tuesday.”

     Monday was a rest day for the teachers.

     “Bye!”

     Mo-on went home as Austin and Sean wandered the rest of the Bazaar. Joe Lugti soon joined them but he was more with Sean than with Austin.

     They were in the Hot Rice Stand when Austin began reciting his own pseudo poetry/rants.

     “All the months passed by and this is what she does…” Austin says in a drunk like tone.

     “This is taking forever…” Joe said.

     “Now here I am, acting out to the happy moments of my life. I’m not depressed, see? I’m smiling, b***h! As of this moment, I have six hours of happiness.”

     “Is that what the ring is about?” Sean asked.

     “Yes. But I hope that every time I see her from this day forth, I don’t break down, acting like what third parties might perceive as how a depraved homosexual would act if his pet gay gerbil left him for a lesbian goldfish. Like that makes sense, right? I’M HAPPY!”

     “Weren’t we in the front of the line?” Joe said.

     “This is just another day…. It won’t get in the way… Of my happiness, that will stay… This is my life, I’m in… d****t, I can’t rhyme to save my life.”

     “You do know that musicals are scripted right?”
     Austin saw her pass by again to the main diner area and, like a spontaneous urge to do something completely irrational, he charged on the far opposite end of the Acacia lane, following her and her family.

     He lost sight of her and sadly marched back in front of the rice stand.

     “I lost her… again…”

     “I think your time is u�"“
     “I’M HAPPY! I AM VERY HAPPY!”

     “If you wish…”

     “If this takes four hours, I swear…” Joe complained.

     Austin looked into the sky and, as if they were hit by a giant beam of mood whiplash…

     “You’re beautiful… You’re beautiful… You’re beautiful, it’s true… There must be an angel with a smile on her face… When she thought up that I should be with you… But it’s time face the truth… I will never be with you…”

     Joe and Sean were relatively surprised.

     “That’s odd. If you don’t goof it up, you can actually be a decent singer,” Sean said.

     “I’m in the mood. Despite the sad nature of that song. I’M HAPPY!”

     “Whatever you say. Aren’t you gonna eat dinner?”

     “Yeah. Some barbecue will do the trick.”

 

They spoke more about it during dinner.

     “So you waited in line but you didn’t buy anything?” Sean asked Joe.

     “Nope. Just eat your rice.”

     Sean slowly opened his rice and saw the smoke rise from it.

     “It’s still hot. Better let it cool down.”
     “I still can’t believe it. I truly loved her. My first true love and boom, bang, gone like the wind. It happened so fast. It was faster than the speed of light. “

     “That’s infatuation for ya,” Sean said.

     “NO! It wasn’t infatuation. I do not believe that teens can’t fall in genuine love, and by d****t if I don’t sound like a gay b***h looking for his… what’s a male dog?”

     They shrugged their shoulders.

     “Maybe it wasn’t love but just a deeper form if infatuation, if you get me.”

     “Since you are infinitely more badass than I am, I’ll take your word for it. You know what? I’m not going to rick breaking my streak so I’m going play Avenged Sevenfold. Have you heard Buried Alive yet?”

     “Yeah.”

     Austin took out his iPod and slightly amplified it. He played buried alive just as Sean’s phone rang. Austin had to lower the volume. Joe liked it though.

     Sean talked through the entire song and when he finally ended the call, the song was over.

      “Damn, I missed that.”

     “I’ll play it again.”

     Austin played the song again but out of nowhere…

      “WHAT THE S**T?!”

     Sean grabbed the rice in his plate with his bare hands and threw it at the floor.

     “What the hell was that?!” Austin asked.

     “That was like, a hundred degrees Celsius!”

     Austin and Joe laughed at his random outburst.

     They walked around the school, listening to A7X, talking about random stuff until about 9 PM where Joe left.

     They stayed near the front gates, just talking.

     “Are you sure there are absolutely zero people you might have a crush on?”

     “Maybe. Maybe none…”

     “Come on, be honest with me.”

     He hesitated for a while. The defense mechanism in his brain was faltering due to intense heartbreak, allowing him to like other girls.

     “Maybe there’s one…”

     “D****t, this is good. Who?”

     “I ain’t telling.”

     “Come on!”

     “Well, she’s in CV.”

     “Okay… go on.”
     “That’s it.”

     “Ok…”

     Sean gave him the silent treatment, causing Austin to break.

     “FINE! I’ll tell you.”

     Austin told him.

     “Really? Why her?”

     “She’s nice and we have a lot in common. But I don’t want to move too fast. Like I said earlier, I don’t like to use people just for the sake of moving on.”

     “I think that’s for the best. Hey, check that out.”

     Sean pointed to a few third years playing with the fake snow.

     They were taking it a bit too seriously, spraying the can even if it’s empty.

     Then Sr. Leo passed by and the best thing possible happened, they sprayed him.

     Austin and Sean were cheering inside as Sr. Leo was covered by the snow. He shrugged it off and walked away.

     “Well, on the bright side. 9.5 HOURS!”

     “Nice. Can you make twenty-four?”

     “I hope so.”

     As they continued talking about heartbreak and the possibility of the Visayas building to be destroyed, a vehicle drove in playing “Sometimes When We Touch” on the radio, just as Austin was getting emotional.

     “D****t, when did Bumblebee enter the scene?” Austin asked.

     “I think it’s for the best. I gotta go.”

     “I’ll be going as well. It was a fun day, really.”
     “Agreed. See you on Tuesday.”

     “Same here.”

     Austin got into the Anonymous and drove back to his room. He waited until he had secured ten hours on his clock. While waiting, he began to configure a new database in the Island systems. After the ten hours was up, he tried falling asleep. He slept with the ring and he slept soundly.