Not a single member stronger.

            At what point does a simple act of teenage mischief transform into a life-altering experience for a portion of a small town in Kentucky?  This question presented itself to me at the ripe old age of fifteen.  I was living about an hour outside the town of Louisa, Kentucky, population fifteen hundred, and spending my summer weekends with friends who lived downtown.  We occupied our days skateboarding, visiting girlfriends and just being teenage boys.

            One Saturday morning shortly after sunrise four of us decided to hit the streets.  There was still dew on the grass in the front lawn of my buddy's small suburban house.  I remember wiping my feet on the sidewalk before mounting my skateboard and pushing off.  We decided to hit the local Pack-N-Sack to buy a bag of powdered donuts for breakfast.

            As we skated down Main Street, we passed the town hall and noticed a small group was beginning to congregate on the sidewalk out front.  We all power slid our skateboards to a stop and the noise drew the attention of the group.  The first thing I noticed was they were all men of varying ages.  From a young man that could not have been older we were to an aged man who held himself with the authority of an Army General and appeared to be instructing the group.  They watched us for a moment before turning back to their business.

            My best friend Jason was the first to realize who these men were.  “Dude, look at their clothes.  Those guys are Klan.” he blurted.  He was right; I was not sure how I had missed it.  By this time, the sun was up fully and it was glaringly obvious by the white robes they wore.  I remember thinking to myself What the hell are the Klan doing here?  I had never even seen a Klan member in real life before this very moment. 

            My stare caught the attention of the General, who unlike the rest of the group was dressed in red.  He leaned close to one of the younger members and pointed our direction.  The young man nodded at the instructions and eagerly trotted across the street towards us.  “Hey guys, what's up?” he asked as he approached us.  We looked at each other puzzled.

            “Um, nothing,” I replied deadpan.

            “We noticed you watching us and my dad wanted me to come over and see if we can answer any question you have.”

            “We only have one question,” said Jason. “What are you guys doing?”  The young man spent the next couple of minutes explaining to us that they were in town for something he referred to as a recruiting march.  They were going to conduct a parade through the town and attempt to recruit members.  While I was sitting there listening to this young man all I could think about were the movies I had seen growing up.  My image of the Klan was violence and cruelty to anyone that was not part of their order.  Even though this kid was being very polite and he really just seemed like a normal guy, I found myself becoming angry with him.

            Even at this time in my life, in the year 1991, I knew that their racism and bigotry was wrong.  How dare they come to our little town and march through our streets trying to recruit people to join in their nefarious affairs of burning crosses and throwing rocks through “Negroes” windows.  Those movie images just kept flashing through my mind clouding my vision and I could feel my blood pressure rising.

            Then it happened.  “Would you like to join our march?” he asked.  That was the breaking point for me.  I spat a couple of expletives his direction and off we went.  I will never forget the sight of him standing there with his mouth hanging open in shock as if someone had just belted him across his face.  That day we decided to protest.

            “KKK GO AWAY!” read my white sign in bold black letters, of which the irony was not lost on me.  We spent the next four hours skating up and down the sidewalk protesting as they marched through the streets of our town.  It began with only the four of us and ended with more than two hundred locals protesting right alongside of us.  My friends and I were featured in three different newspapers and interviewed on the local news.  A man who was following the Klan for a documentary also interviewed us.

            When it was all said and done the Klan had reacted exactly as I imagined.  They took pictures of us with Polaroid cameras and yelled such threats as, “We'll remember you!” and “We'll find out who you are, and we'll come to visit.”  This of course only cemented my feelings toward this archaic and ridiculous organization.  Even though our protest was born out of my anger, the day ended with an overwhelming feeling of togetherness and single purpose as our small town came together in such force.  The Klan left that day not even a single member stronger.

Author's Note

Is this easy to read? Does it have a natural flow or does it seem too scripted? Is there enough colorful (pun intended) description? Thanks.

Reviews

[Chris Kay]

I liked it a lot, very good piece of work.

I do find that you sometimes choose an awkward word that slows down the flow, but that just might be me, so don't take it as a serious problem. But if you want an example: you say "The Klan left that day not even a single member stronger," when I think "The Klan left that day not a single member stronger" would be more concise. Another example: "came together in such force" sounds kind of strange to me, "came together as one" or "unified" would be a bit more concise and make more sense.

Otherwise, I liked the story a lot, I liked the lesson, the outcome, the reveal of the Klan (it was perfect, enough time to build up curiosity, but not enough time to figure it out, making it a surprise), and the writing style minus the few things I pointed out.

Good job and please continue writing!

Oh, and piece of advice if you want people to read your work: join groups that say "Review for Review" or anything like that and post your work in the writing section. The idea is that every time you review someone's work, they are supposed to write you a review.

[Q.L. Diehl]

Awesome, thank you so much. After reading your review I went back and actually read the piece aloud and I can totally see what you mean. I even found several other examples. Thanks so much for the review and the advice on getting more readers.

[D.L. Coleman]

Your writing is good, but lacks attention to details. Place a period at the end of the first sentence, for example, a hyphen between "life altering," a comma after "Louisa," and "Kentucky." Say said instead of "blurted." Most speech is understood. "Klan" stays Klan and not "clan" in another sentence. The litte details done and you're on a roll.

[Q.L. Diehl]

Thanks for taking the time to read it and I appreciate your feedback. I'm still learning the fine art of self editing. :-)

[Q.L. Diehl]

I made the revisions you mentioned. Thank you again.

[Amber Lily]

First I would like to say THANK YOU! When a lot of people ask me to read stories is just one huge paragraph in tiny font. However, you actually made paragraphs and at a readable font!
I really like this story, it describes how opinionated teenagers are and how they should not be ignored just because of their age.
Although if I may make one suggestion, in sentences like, "By this time, the sun was up fully and it was glaringly obvious by the white robes they wore." there are ways to reword this so it's words and easier to read. Like "By this time, the sun was at it's highest, glaring obnoxiously on their white robes."
Otherwise I found it very easy to read and a great write :)

[Q.L. Diehl]

Excellent advice, thank you. This is an essay I wrote about 4 years ago. I'm new to the site and I wanted to test the waters to see if anyone would even read my work. Thanks a million for taking the time to read it. I'll post more soon. By the way, I'm a huge fan of the fantasy genre so I'm looking forward to reading your prose. :-)

[Amber Lily]

Oh then let me say welcome to Writer's Café! People on this site are pretty serious about their work so they give nice, open reviews. However some give more advice than others. If you ever want me to read anything specific send me a read request and I'll be happy to do so :) I'm glad you love fantasy! In my opinion it's the most fun because you can make anything happen! :)