The quiet ones

They say you're beautiful,

     delightful,

           loved,

         appreciated,

                                                          wise and,

      important, when you're dead.

Until that day they make sure

you'll never come back,

you are the dirt under

their heels.

You see it in their smile

They only follow to 

watch you f

               a

               l  

               looking for a new target when you're broken

They whisper words

that cut sharper than any 

blade you've ever felt

They burn 

leaving embers on your

heart and burn marks

covering your withering spirit

They say you're worthless,

                   stupid,

   an embarrassment,

            disgusting,

         unlovable, 

        and a waste of space, and in the end they've killed You.

    

Author's Note

Tell me what you think? I swear I don't always write really morbid sad stuff, it's just the mood I've been in lately. Happy stuff to come.

Reviews

[therisa]

Love the metaphoric way that this poem express the pettiness of some people to others, especially, those on the outside, looking in.

[ANTO]

Loved the styling - especially the f - a - l - l device. Its a dog-eat-dog world and then they piss on your grave.QC
But at least people like you and I - we can see that and we're not being fooled.

[QuietlyCrash]

Wow, thanks I really appreciate the review. It is completely true, people are cruel but there has to be someone out there who is willing to stop this nonsense.

[ANTO]

Currently suffering at the hands of a very clever workplace bully myself QC but I often read 'Invictus' by by the English poet William Ernest Henley and it bouys me up. I am 'bloody but unbowed' and it irks the hell outta my bully. Take care QC (HUG)

[QuietlyCrash]

Oh my. Even as adults, that is ridiculous. What makes others feel like they are better than then the rest of us? I'm sorry you are dealing with a bully. but, I'm proud of you for snubbing him because in the end he's the one that'll look like an a*s hat. I hope everything works out, and he either gets fired or run down by a group of angry beavers.
-Riley:)

[ANTO]

ROFL @ 'run down by a group of angry beavers' + 'a*s hat'. Thanks for the support Riley! I actually feel sorry for the guys who 'follow' him because of he can manipulate them.

[Brandon S. Whitten]

Splendid read and write. Bravo! We do seem to respect the dead more than the living.

[QuietlyCrash]

Why thank you for the kind review :)

[NebraskaHope]

I loved this poem, it was something looking forward to read. I loved the concept ! Keep up the good work !

[QuietlyCrash]

Wow, thanks for stopping by to review :)

[SyberRose]

Very creative dear...we all write dark once in a while...Enjoyed reading...Rose

[QuietlyCrash]

Thank you so much lovely :)

[writ rajat]

instead of taking old form of poem writing you invent a new form I really like your poem

[QuietlyCrash]

Thank you

[Troy Henson]

Very well structured and the content although dark is measured well in reality. I love the depiction of when your dead your loved but getting there the love is less.
Great work

[QuietlyCrash]

Thank you so much

[Jack...]

Very creative my friend. I like dark sometimes and your poetry has filled that like. Very nice.

[QuietlyCrash]

Well thank ya very kindly :)

[quinfinn]

this is excellent! i love the format , and the message you so skillfully emote herein. outstanding!

[QuietlyCrash]

Thank you so much :)

[Cool Handless Luke]

I like what you have down. Sometimes people take this format and it gets to chaotic and you lose the flow of the words themselves but you didn't let that happen. Very well executed (no pun intended!)

[QuietlyCrash]

Haha, thank you so much for your kind words. :)