Two Heartaches In One

Me and JadedSparrow wrote this together. We put our broken hearts together and came up with this poem.

Two Heartaches In One

I awoke this morning to find my pillow damp with tears.
Not so long ago, joy embraced me,
Now I have only grief.
When did I become this wretch...
Feeling weak in my heart
Where I can’t find trust
I have fallen into your trap once more
And its buried me deep..
So deep that the light of the sun seems to have disappeared.
I am shrouded in the melancholy darkness of depression.
I have forgotten how to smile...
How long must I endure the agony of living...
The rain keeps falling
And I can’t see the light of day
Because its blocked by all the pain
There is no more love in me;
Only the putrid disgust for the emotion.
My suffering has gone on for an eternity...
Surly I have paid the price for whatever wrongs I have done.

 

 

Written by QuietPoet and JadedSparrow

Reviews

[R J Askew]

Strong stuff, bang on honest. Tim sent me this and I am glad he did cos it is real life nailed down on the page. OK life can be a bit warty, but the human spirit takes it on the chin ... and goes on. And when it goes on with a kindred spirit who has maybe also taken a hit, THAT is positive and gives hope to others who have take a hit or two. I suppose it is about living as true as we can. Not a difficult philosophy, but one that helicopter brains seem to like making complex.

[Brjden (Bridge-Den) Cre..]

Very strong write! Filled with tons of agony and pain! You used great, descriptive metaphors! A very good write!

[laceyjane23]

Very nice, and filled with so much emotion, heartbeak has such a strong presence in this piece, very well put together!
laceyjane

[C.J.]

very nice it has a good meaning and a poem like this should be not underlooked i injoyed this poem alot.

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

Beautifully written and sad poem. Thank you for sharing. Debileah

[Christine]

"My suffering has gone on for an eternity...
Surly I have paid the price for whatever wrongs I have done."

I think we have all experienced this emotion as sometime in our lives. It does seem though, that some of us suffer longer and more intensely than others. Powerful feelings bring out great writings.

Great Write. Great Collaboration.

~Christine :-)

[RHEA CROSLEY]

Good write with this honest and artistic expression of "the depths of despair". Only one who has been there could write this so well. I feel for you and hope that things are starting to look up now.

[pal]

Deep one.. touching hearts..

pal

[T]

A wonderfully written collaboration! The blending of your inks captured, the sorrow and the despair in a world that is not always kind ...

"surely I have paid the price for whatever wrongs I have done"

hits me big time. I've asked that question many times and can't wait until that "debt" is paid in full and put it behind once and for all!

Awesome! Strong, honest emotions here!

Hugs to both
Tiana

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Darkness is so strong it can swallow us whole and not even belch. This is written so well, I know the feeling, it's afamilar stranger to me.

these lines say it all.

So deep that the light of the sun seems to have disappeared.
I am shrouded in the melancholy darkness of depression.
I have forgotten how to smile...

Well written.

[Dani California]

Oh my ... the agony of heartbreak just oozed
right off of this poem and found its way into my
memory .... and from there it traveled to old
emotions and ripped my heart out. Ouch!

You have written this so well... the two of you.
Amazingly so..

Lived. Felt. and last but not least..
Survived.

Outstanding work!!
I thank Tim for sending me this!

Bravo!