Weird Times in Oscars High School Daze Tease.

This is the second episode of the show I'm writing and like last it starts with a tease.

TEASER

 

EXT. OUTSIDE OF THE BAR �" NIGHT

 

The bar door opens and two men walks out dragging Paul Kessler out of the bar. They throw him to the ground and begins heading back into the bar. The man tries to get to his feet, but falls back to the ground. He is obliviously drunk as he has trouble getting up.

Paul:

You can do this to me. I’m a I’m a

 

Guard #1:

Shut up, Paul! Go home and get yourself clean up.

(He turns to other guard)

Can you believe this guy is a teacher? Thank god, my kid goes to private school.

 

Guard #2

How the hell you do afford tuition with this job?

 

The two men goes back into the bar leaving Paul alone in a dark parking lot. He starts walking to his car that was only a few steps. He was unaware that someone was watching him through the bushes. He finally reached his car and lean on it as he reached into his pocket. He pulls out his car keys only to drop them on the ground.

Paul:

Damn it!

 

He knees down to pick them up when he hears the sound of water dipping. He turns around to see woman whose face is hidden in darkness.

Paul:

Hey, baby looking for a good time. Wait you, no you’re.

 

Then a stream of water sprays into Paul’s mouth. Paul falls to his knees before falling on his back with the water still entering his mouth.

 

Moments later…

 

The police arrives closing off the area as reporters surround the place. Sheriff Mike Tennyson arrived at the scene and is immediately approach by Samantha Tennyson.

 

 

Sam:

So Sheriff, have you identify the corpse?

 

Mike:

Yes, it’s Paul Kessler

 

Sam:

Have you come up with theory on how he died?

 

Mike:

Sweetie, I haven’t even looked at the body yet.

(Then he walks past her only to stop)

Oh, and don’t forget your mother making dinner Friday.

 Don’t be late like last time.

 

He continues walking to the crime scene when he is approach by one of his deputies Alice Wellman.

 

Sam:

Have we found the cause of death, Wellman?

 

Alice:

Well, we think that he drowned. There were no witnesses as everyone was in the bar and a couple found him lying on the ground.

 

Sam:

So someone took him over to the river drowned him and brought back here.

 

Woman (O.S):

If you know the cause of death then can we take him to the morgue already?

 

Mike and Alice turned around to see Jane Winter walking past the police with a couple of men.

Mike:

Sure, I will be around later to check for some kind of evidence.

(He kneed down to the ground and then he looked at the body)

We got a murder on the loose and I want to catch before he kills someone else.

 

Jane:

Do you guys smell that?

 

Mike looks at corpse and sniffs the area.

 

Mike:

Salt water, it smells like salt water.

 

Alice:

Are you trying to tell me that guy drowned in the ocean? Impossible, there’s only a lake around here.

 

Mike:

S**t! I think this case is going to be a tricky one.

 

END OF TEASE

Reviews

[melissa]

I love all the screenplay keep the great work

[Mrs.Sophrosyne]

Really mysterious, I like it. The female character presented reminds me of the one woman from that old TV show, Invisible Man or Quicksilver, whichever it was called. This is awesome and I can't wait to read more.

[Senseless whatever]

Good start. I would say highlight the main characters with a little more detail. Looks and the like. Helps them stand out from the rest without giving away the story.

[AlexMrrqn]

ohhhh. murder mystery. very captivating. keep at it, hopefully you will release more.

[Cherry Blossom]

wow wite more this is going to be good I coudent stop reading good job