lilith

proving you can't always trust

w***e of babylon, seducer of man
beguiling with your web of lies
bride of satan, destroyer of love
i journeyed with you to the bridge of sighs

purveyor of evil, messenger of fate
no man can endure your cruel, black heart
b***h of the underworld, queen of the damned
i gave you my soul and you ripped it apart

temptress of ages, tormentor of fools
deception is your killing blow
betrayer of innocence, angel of falsehood
i payed the ultimate for loving you so

mistress of mayhem, bringer of woe
man's servitude is your eternal bliss
goddess of darkness, princess of perversion
brought about my damnation with a poisonous kiss

Reviews

[KAOlmsted]

Aha! It's all your fault. (I was wondering what inspired BR to want to anally violate Lilith) :-D I'm sensing a bit of rage in this piece...just a touch. Maybe be a little less ambiguous with your feelings in future, give us a shot at figuring out what the emotional inspiration was for a piece? Thanks ;-)

[quinfinn]

go back to my much older postings, kimmer, much less ambiguous. thanks for reading me

[KAOlmsted]

I really should have a different color font for sarcasm ;-) My pleasure, quin.

[quinfinn]

sometimes i am rather thick, it is my current emotional state

[Siren]

Yes, I do believe that the people who say they won't hurt you are those to be wary of. Snakes hide well in the murky waters of swamps. Perhaps our best chance is to always be on our guard. But even the best of us fall. Well-written, my friend.

[quinfinn]

thank you so much!

[Siren]

always (:

[patti]

I can almost feel the anger boiling on the page, that poems describe a girl from my past... great poem and very enjoyable reading this piece of good work

[quinfinn]

thank you so much, patti

[Clockwork]

I think you bring the classic story to life with flair and grace. I liked the bit about the bridge of sight quite a bit.

I was engaged to a girl like this; I think everyone around me realized it before I did. You really capture that kind of girl very well in this piece.

[quinfinn]

it's okay Clockwork, you can say "b***h" i won't get upset! thanks for reading!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Ha Quin no hard feelings then?
Nice rant and I too have been married to her. More than once!

[quinfinn]

we were married to the same broad? nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!

[s y e]

Woweeee!! This is amazing!! So much emotion written in it! Well done!

[quinfinn]

thank you!

[s y e]

Welcome! Anytime!

[Leslie Philibert]

A great rant, full of emotions, tough and honest - poetry should be full of energy.
(But...is she really so awful ? - perhaps there are reasons you don`t know why she behaves so badly, but I digress) Fine poem.

[quinfinn]

i suppose it could have been pre-menopausal rage? thank s for commenting

[Coyote Poetry]

Poor Lilith. Got blame for the downfall of many. I did your story. Myth of woman who took the good from a man are always a interesting tale. I like reading about Lilith. She showed up in many modern tale and story. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[quinfinn]

truly, Lilith has but one purpose and mission on this earth...the ruination and subjugation of man. thank you for reading, John

[Carolann Dowsett]

Wow!! You have written this so well, it's amazing. The lies of the wanton woman can lead to such suffering. I'm sorry you had to go through this.

[quinfinn]

thank you so much for reading. rest assured that i generally look upon women as angels and beautiful flowers. cruelty can influence our actions. had to spit this out of my heart, you know?

[Carolann Dowsett]

Yes I fully understand and I know that some woman can be like this just as some men can abuse. Evil is evil in any form.

[quinfinn]

so true....thanks again

[Carolann Dowsett]

Welcome :)

[Salar Majak]

wow!, i feel that it's boiling! the poem i mean, such anger is showen in it,! i loved it!, the use of the queen of the underworld to consoul a broken heart, amazing

[quinfinn]

you are a gem, Sal...thank you so much!

[Salar Majak]

;) you are welcome

[Frieda P]

I don't know how you do it but you can take a vile subject matter and turn it into a finely tuned masterpiece. It's well written, smacks you over the head, then punches you in the gut. Straightforward would be a huge understatement, there's still steam coming off this piece!

[quinfinn]

cruelty and betrayal are excellent fuel for a tale of loathing and disgust, n'est pas?

[Frieda P]

If you want me to have an intelligent thought or response in my head then don't throw French at me ;-)

[quinfinn]

i believe that phrase, loosely translated, means...is it not so?

[Frieda P]

ha, I knew that! You missed my point entirely....

[quinfinn]

oh i get you.....parlez vous humma humma?

[Frieda P]

:D

[Frieda P]

French with a twist is even better!

[quinfinn]

that settles it, we gotta meet.....

[Frieda P]

soon as you figure out what to do with my shoes ;-)

[quinfinn]

oh, that's a hard one....(funny, that's what she said) i dunno from shoes!

[Frieda P]

you can speak french but are clueless about shoes, what a man you are....

[quinfinn]

i quite special and have some "explosive" talents...who needs shoes?