Listen Wind

Softly sings the soughing wind through the trees of old

Whispering a story lips have never told

Once upon a time or so the wind does say

When he speaks through the leaves of that glorious day

The sun shined dapple through the branches high

And in the blades of meadow grass you heard the lovers sigh

And so he gently prattles on love to eternity

And shares his vast knowledge of lost virginity

Author's Note

Not completely sure about the last two lines. Taking suggestions.

Reviews

[Luna Tique Fringe]

Oh, very nice..love the vocab in the first line, in fact I love the first four. I'm not a big fan of "once apon a time"..but in this case, for me, it works. Beautiful imagery, lovely story...the last two lines are perfect...the only suggestion I have is to break it down into quatrains. This has such a good flow and rhythm it reads too fast. By breaking it up it will slow us down, it will give us a chance to absorb more of beauty of the piece...it feels good but it's over too soon..like making love, lol.

[Adam Greenfield]

Very serene poem. At first I wasn't sure of the last two lines either but I read it again (and again) and it grew on me. I think it really sets the scene. Great poem.

[Lyr J. Thirsk]

listen girl, dont change a thing....
one of the best ive seen!

truly
jake

[Krystal Lynn Darling, T..]

My suggestion: Leave it as it is :) this is BEAUTIFUL! & so perfect. I love the rhyme scheme! Favorite.