Feel This Pain

Welcome oblivion... yeah!
Here's a pernicious thought
Crawl back to your source of happiness
Taint it with nondescript alienation
Slip a smile full of venom
and add the overkill of guilt
Break that whip upon my back
maybe then I'll feel your pain

This is where Heaven breaks
Should I care? I wish I didn't
Add to the weight upon my shoulders
and steal the emotions I keep for myself
I wish I was somebody else
maybe then I'd have a heart to share
Maybe then I'd be good enough
instead of wilting like a common weed...

Reviews

[just Penny]

When you write dark, it has the raw, real credibility that gnaws away at memories of similar experiences. I have my own key to the door to oblivion as I am a frequent flyer too :( The pain and torment in the first stanza is palpable, while the second stanza reeks of hurtful discontent. There are those who delight in emotional abuse like they have some self righteous crusade to destroy the worth of another. In-your-face poetry. Just how I like it. Excellent writing here. Penny

[Sibusiso Xtdo Gama]

i respect you for being able to write about such anger, some of us fail to, me invluded. am sorry if i didpute anyone but that anger un show inspired this poem so you shouldn't show any less of it, we want it as it is.

This is where Heaven breaks
Should I care? I wish I didn't( this impies a thought beyond earth, because after all we have heaven to deal with, i love the fact that u care)


Add to the weight upon my shoulders
and steal the emotions I keep for myself( bitter sarcasm on this line, i have to say )
I wish I was somebody else(it happens to us all)

[Lonely Scorpio Girl]

A good heart to share with others does not necessarily resides within a specific character. Dost cloth maketh the man? Dost character maketh the heart? A good heart shares with the world love, happiness, pain, sorrow, anger, envy, loneliness and everything else that makes its owner human. This poem is the reflection of a good human heart. Thank you for sharing this lovely poem.

[Honey-Bee]

Interesting poem! Maybe there is just a little bit of anger and loss of hope in your poem as you proclaim-I wish I was someone else... Slip a smile full of venom and add the overkill of guilt...This is a strong line! Good poem! Thanks for sharing!

[Emily]

Love your wording!! Well done.

[melissa]

This is a great poem keep up the great work i can't wait to read more