Internet Dating Love Song

Got a profile set up on some famous, brand name dating site
I wonder if it's possible to catch an STD from pretentious lettering
Surely the losers who believe in sex and love will profit
As long as the money rolls in, we'll never have to die alone

Of course, her t shirt is too tight
Her n*****s demand the focus
And his package leaves an impression
beneath a bare chest of photoshopped muscle

Got a profile set up on the aforementioned dating site
If she has one decent photo will she be my soulmate?
Well, being as I am already set up on there, who am I to complain?
It's hard to be high and mighty when your date is only on skype

Of course, she's not wearing a bra
maybe that's where she wants the focus
And he claims to be a good listener
yet all he does is talk about himself

When you die, you'll live forever
because your profile will never be deleted
Just reused over and over and over

Author's Note

A satire of online relationships in general.

Reviews

[zephyr]

You said it … this piece hits the nail. Unfortunately, I think you may have characterized dating on the whole. So much of it is about appearance and posing. The only difference is the internet allows you to do it on a larger scale. Pretty spectacular write, Elliot.

[L4rn13]

I laughed at this on because its so sad but true. First impressions are really important after all.

[burnhouse]

It honestly made me chuckle at the thought how rue it is and where the world got to. Nicely done.

[Katie Alexander]

Best satire I've read on this site for a while. Really accurate and relevant to common dating standards

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

Interesting write, and nice words of truth. I like stanza four and these lines:
"If she has one decent photo will she be my soulmate?"

"When you die, you'll live forever"