Garden

Some mornings are like the melodies of unwritten songs
cradling me in beautiful thoughts of places I've never been
I can see the grey dissolve into the pale silver of the day
and as the dew dries on the hills I can finally awaken

I feel like a poem unwritten but kept firmly in mind
maybe in someone's dream I can mean something
But for now, let me rest as the birdsong flutters
and I believe I'm lying on the lone cloud passing above

There's a spider web stretching out above the bluebells
maybe soon I'll walk between each yawning flower
So the rain may have fallen not so long ago
now it makes this beautiful garden shimmer

Reviews

[L4rn13]

Beautiful and full of imagery. It reminds me of the film Pan's labyrinth after the girl has fulfilled her destiny and is taken back to her kingdom,where she dances in a beautiful garden...

Such beautiful description and imagery...refreshing like dew drops on rose petals...

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Some mornings are like the melodies of unwritten songs

I feel like a poem unwritten but kept firmly in mind

-My favorite similes. :)

[Robbie~xoxo~]

"There's a spider web stretching out above the bluebells
maybe soon I'll walk between each yawning flower
So the rain may have fallen not so long ago
now it makes this beautiful garden shimmer"~ I sense something optimistic in this stanza...for me the rain represents a cleansing.

Lovely work of art, Elliott!~xoxo~

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Lots of imagery in the lines --- Elliot...the way you start this verse...as a reader I was taken-in the moment...you capture us into this world...of yours...if you look into your words --- each stanza with the first two lines exhibits the pace and transcends the write for all its worth and then you collectively group the event in each one...as if in these lines:

Some mornings are like the melodies of unwritten songs
cradling me in beautiful thoughts of places I've never been
---
I feel like a poem unwritten but kept firmly in mind
maybe in someone's dream I can mean something
---
There's a spider web stretching out above the bluebells
maybe soon I'll walk between each yawning flower

Glad I came across this work...you put out enough in 12 lines...and give us a complete package here...Good day...