No Love Remains

I'm young enough to fall in love
but old enough to appreciate it
From the illumine of the stars
I can see the moonlight soaked streets
lead onto the hill of a wonderland
where we can truly be free

From the streets of broken hearts
you will find me in the loving gaze
of the secret stories held close to your thoughts
Trespass my diaries I will be confined
to the heaven of your love
even if the darkness scares me
I'll be safe within your thoughts

Through the gardens
through the fables
what I feel will always remain
sure enough, you will depart
outgrown the adoration
that I had for you
But what of my tears?
The darkest of moments will enslave me
I never wanted more
just the lie that nothing will change

Even if I am left here
The liars and the thieves that
masquerade as angels
They have your grace
They have your indifference
Will they be all I need?
Even if no love remains
I will live unknowing

I'm young enough to accept this desertion
but old enough to suffer it
If there is a soul that can understand
let me breathe...
I will scream to the Heavens
let me be this way

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

The first two lines of this piece grabbed me tightly...young enough to fall in love and old enough to appreciate it. What an amazing way to start a piece. Then, you bring it back together with a derivation of the same lines in the last stanza, which was also brilliantly done.

My favorite lines were the ones mentioned above. Stylistically, you have a very strong poetic voice, which I quite enjoy. You have a way of getting "deep" into things that most people would otherwise gloss over. I imagine you writing something like this furiously; sort of a mad hatter with a pen. Perhaps you could add in a bit more tangible imagery, but that's a choice you would have to make.

Overall, I quite enjoyed this. Possibly a little wordy in sections, but it applies nicely to the furious nature of the write. Well done.

[minnie:)]

Very Gothic and dark, a lot of sad emotion, the write was very good.
~Minnie

[Atthis Rose]

This is surely one of the better poems written on this site. I was beginning to despair

[Simon Welsh]

Thank you :) there are some good writers on here. Just look thru my friend's list :)

[Angel]

Young enough to fall in love...old enough to appreciate it...
Such optimism, such hope...such innocence...
Beautifully put, I've been there, I understand. I am taken with the grand vision of love.

And then
I'm young enough to accept this desertion
but old enough to suffer it
Oh the heartbreak of those lines...

But, you know, not what I think about it, I think I would have turned those lines around...old enough to accept the disertion...but young enough to feel the pain of it...
Just a suggestion.

[Simon Welsh]

Perhaps but it changes the intention I had behind writing it. Good suggestion though.

[Simon Welsh]

Perhaps but it changes my original intentions behind the lines. Good suggestion though.

[Richard]

Truly a romantic era gem ... great stuff man

[GirlOnFire]

I like this ... Its nice .keep up your good work :)

[chaotic katie]

Another flawless piece. Beautufully written. 100/100