Shadows of Hell

Trapped in ones own phobia

Shadows fall where darkness hasnt reached
Even in broad daylight, every corner and street
Secrets there grow in scandalous ways
Speaking no words, but huge prices to pay

The shadows grow as night draws near
No sound to be heard, but just a sense of fear
Streetlights cast pools of safety obsolete
Sanctuary shortlived, it's time will deplete

Passersby pay no attention to your plight
It'll be a struggle to get out of this night
Car lights pass and the shadows retreat
Only to return and lay ready at your feet

The daunting task of escaping so real
Nowhere to turn, no help do I feel
My mind lives the chaos I face thru tonight
I'm still left helpless, not knowing how to fight

But dawn approaches over the hill to my right
I survived this encounter, of deadly shadowy
fright
And then it occurs to me as the sun is fully
rose
My Hell is my livingroom, where shadows are
permanently froze.

Author's Note

Written about a dear friend

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Your writing is intensely descriptive, getting across the sensations of being haunted by one's own thoughts & feelings. Since this is about a friend of yours, I can imagine how hard it is to watch someone else going thru this & not being able to do anything to stop the bleak visions. Sometimes I like a poem with uneven cadence & line length, but this poem seems to feel like it's trying to get to a place where the rhythm & rhyme are well-crafted, but a few lines have too many words & it seems like you need to be a little more brave when it comes to getting rid of extra words so you can pen a very tightly crafted rhyme & rhythm. You're close, but just need to prune a word here & there! *wink! wink!* Fondly, Margie

[gram linski]

claustrophobic and intense I can feel the night creeping into my skin, the shadows of Hell bouncing in fire light flame, frozen shadows in the room,