Nebulas, black holes and tarot books.

In the night sky there is a small light,

You would miss it if you were not looking for it,

But it is there,

 among the nebulas and the black holes and

All those other things I would have learned about in science.

 

Had I been paying attention.

 

This light that exists in the abyss of vastness

Belongs to the happiness you bring to my life.

I know that some sage like women

Would tell you that my words to you are beautiful.

They will say that I must feel the truest form of adoration

If I am able to put such phrases together to

Exemplify how perfect you are and how glad my heart is

To have your hands wrapped around it.

 

Well, that may be.  

 

But I think these words are cheesy,

And the themes are over used and the images

That this aforementioned "little space light" brings to mind

Make me want to die. 

 

Who am I trying to be anyway?

The lady with the broken heart who never quite heals,

that sits alone at the library from open to close

Reading tarot books searching for signs in everyday things?

You know, liike the weather, the radio and the name of the gas station attendant?

Turns out I am that girl, and it sucks, and it’s all your fault.

 

You have cursed me to a life of mindless drivel poetry and

Shower head fantasies of you and me and you not being a total dick.

No, that’s not true, I never fantasize about you.

 

I usually pretend you are someone else

Like a guy with class who doesn’t drink, and treats me like a lady.

Who will hold his tongue and my hand and treat me like a s**t,

If that’s the mood I am in. 

Let’s face it, that isn’t anything like you,

That is fine with me, I just hope its fine with your future lovers

Because let’s face it,  it’s their problem that you are a dick.

 

But I digress.

 

Let’s get back to outer space and cosmic lights

It’s far more beautiful to think about magic balls of gas

Than your face in my morning, noon, nighttime thoughts

Which I have to hide from all my friends.

 

I will get over this one day.

 

One day.

I will be out drinking like sailors with my girlfriends

 and we will hit on the bartender

I will be drunk and chatty and get all hug crazy

as I tend to do after shots of Southern Comfort.

My friend will call me a cab and make me promise to call when I get home

While I hug her goodbye, search for my phone and

trip on my heels

I will look up at the sky  

tremble as I search the stars, but

I won’t see your light,
that light hidden amongst the cosmos

Catching my breath and my bearings,

I will be glad as I fall into the cab

Knowing you are gone.

 

Until then….

Reviews

[The Analog Kid]

I like how you wove in the science stuff with the the personal story of a former lover. Eventually we all continue on in time and space, and all keep existing while we may never collide again. The contrast of the huge universe to your experience works well here.

[EMF]

One second laughing out loud, the next sideswiped by a serious slant, then laughing again. This is beyond stunning. It's effervesant. Loved every second of it. I could go on at great length, but I want to read more of your work

[Mark]

Its very relatable.

[bob, small b. aka invs]

wow. this poem started out in one direction then took a sharp left turn and went somewhere else. but somehow it managed to close in the same place it opened. good trick. i love the honesty and plain, clear words you used thoughout. poetic when necessary, definitely not classically poetic in others. i'm a sucker for conversational style and you do it well here. sounds like the guy was much more a big ball of gas than a star, even though scientifically they may be the same thing.