Lords of the underworld.

And by underworld, I mean, mom's basement.

Trendy girls never seem to understand, when they are all consumed by the way their hair looks or how their purse matches their shoes, they don't pay a scosh of attention to the things that are really important. The things that are the true building blocks of human existence. Those things that embody all that is good, beautiful and fulfilling in life. Those which bring joy to millions and fulfil fantasies for those afraid to dream. I am, of course, referring to role playing games.

What better way to make Nirvana your new home than to break out the 20 sided dye and head to a world where even the most socially awkward A.V. god can slay dragons, cast spells and become a creature of the night? For my money, there is none.

True, players who indulge in these uberfantasy lands have been ostracized for their lack of people skills and carnal knowledge, but those facts seem irrelevant when you weigh the sheer majesty of their power. The ability to slay mystic beings using nothing more than imagination and an invisible dagger charm seems worthy of, at the very least, a medal of valor.

These men are true warriors of peace and justice, even if their mom's make them be home and teeth brushed by the the time the sun sets. Almost irrelevant is the fact that they are mostly in their late 20's, how crass of you for bringing that up in the first place.

Next time you (trendy girl) are out shopping for your new Prada bag to match your super cute Jimmy Choo shoes that perfectly compliment that Gucci dress that you are going to wear to that new martini bar, take a moment to thank our heroes residing in a suburban basement near you. Because really, nothing ruins a coke party like a 10 foot troll.

Reviews

[Dave Lounsbury]

Very nice, I enjoyed your choice of words and use of language.