Too Human

They were too human to be anything but.

The director told me that every time my heart hurts, it's a sign that I'm still human. I'm not sure why he told me that, and why he phrased it like it was a good thing. I didn't understand it even until the day he died.

That humanity in my heart made me hesitate. It made me weak. I watched the high ranking students pull the trigger without hesitation and I hated the way I didn't want to watch the life leave someone's eyes again.

My humanity, my empathy, it disgusted me. I tried to tear out that piece of myself for so long I almost succeeded.

Then one morning, I was sent out on a mission with a new team.

Kidnap the children. Kill the ones who resist.

For the first time, I had to participate in the recruitment process.

The daycare we entered was cute and fun and colored with pinks and oranges. It felt like I was standing in the midst of a sunrise. The other students with me admired it as well.

We entered the room with the children and it was beautiful.

Then it was red.

The color red is familiar to me. In fact, I think it's more familiar to me than the blue sky.

A dark red sun began to rise in this daycare, like it was signaling the blossoming new future of these students. The screams were brief. They always are.

That color reflects in my eyes and I can't look away.

The barrel of a gun nudges my side.

"F-92, what are you waiting for-"

It happens so quickly. I don't know why I moved. I've never moved before. I've killed, mutilated, and watched people be burned alive without moving. The children aren't anything special. Not really. Except I've pulled out my gun from my holster and shot a bullet through my teammates head before I can turn to look at him.

The surroundings turn quiet.

My team is looking at me. The children are looking at me.

"F-92..." I don't know who speaks up. I know that she doesn't have a name. Just like me. "Are you going to disobey orders?"

I can feel my heart pounding vividly under my rib cage. That feeling of disgust rises again.

It's not like I'm talented enough to subdue everyone here.

I'm too human.

I've always been too human.

It's with that disgusting thought that I grab my second gun and shoot the leader of the team and the vice leader dead.

I don't get the chance to do anything more before it goes black with a resounding BANG.

I was too human to save anyone.

Too human to kill everyone who wronged me.

Always too human.

Author's Note

I wrote this in 30 minutes! Have you grasped the concept? Tell me what you think! I'm trying to improve my ability to say things without saying them. How to tell a story with as minimal detail possible. The ending is open ended.