Bad Luck Limericks

Old mademoiselle Dupont 

Went out on a fun nightly jaunt

She was left in distress

When a thief stole her dress

Her jiggly bits she had to flaunt 

A hirsute maid Hortense 

Exposed herself daily on a fence

And many a passer by

Mistook her for a horsefly

She was so bushy and dense

An unlucky guy called Shelly 

Got diarrhea when he went to Delhi 

His toilet filled up with crap

Poo kept flowing like a tap 

They said he had a 'Delhi-Belly'

Reviews

[barleygirl]

These are hilarious & delightful! I always get the urge to write limericks after I read yours. I especially love the one about the hairy lady . . . today's trends are for shaving everywhere, but back in my day, we didn't, & now they call that disgusting pile of hair "a 70's snatch" (meaning dense!) I wrote a collection of limericks that started with you, a few weeks ago, not sure if you saw it, so I'll include the link below. This is the best limerick collection of yours I've read so far. You are getting better & better at this! Here's hoping your Christmas is as bright & outrageous as your limericks! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

called "Ditzy Limericks" . . .
https://www.writerscafe.org/writing/barleygirl/2759285/

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Hi Margie!
Just logged on after ages and absolutely delighted to read much you enjoyed the limericks. Laughing my a*s off on the 70's snatch. Must be nice for a tickle! Oh dear me I should compose at least one limerick on the 70s snatch lol.
I've missed you and all the lovely action here. I just felt let down after AJ left so suddenly and I just didn't log on.
Certainly delighted to log on and thank you so much for the link! I'm going to enjoy your limericks tonight! 😻

[Paul Bell]

That old excuse, a thief stole my dress, she jests.
Exposing yourself on a fence, Horstense, that's an offence.
Shelly's got Delhi belly and now's he's smelly.
Must be Xmas again, amen.
Have a great one, 2021 is just a stone's throw away. This is a warning to Glasshouse owners. Be Good.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

I think 2021 will be The Year of The D***o lol. As new variants of the bloody virus keep emerging and the the travel bans continue, its shall be the best way to celebrate the New Year 😹 Thanks my friend Paul, for stopping by and making me roar with laughs!