It Breaks Me

Be careful what you write...(Disclaimer swallowed)

It breaks me to see myself with your eyes, dwell upon the assumptions you must have of me, to do unto me as you did, I often wonder.

It breaks me to know, I could be so meek in the face of such unprovoked outbursts, chagrin, squalls and misplaced thunder.

It breaks me to know, I could be so utterly giving into the hands of such incessant, self-entitled taking by another.

It breaks me to know, all of me given with every vehement ounce of me, couldn’t garner a response even roadside wenches evince from their labour class lovers.

It breaks me to know, it could have been different for me, had my skin tone been one of milk and not a mocha colour.

It breaks me to know, no matter what the affairs of the heart or the leanings of the soul, the superficial will always prevail over the deeper other.

It breaks me to know, there is a man out there who could commit a crime with such impunity and walk away as I scrub my own remnants off the bloodied floor, over and over.

Author's Note

So said the man eater to those who ate her

Reviews

[¿]

😕....they do it!
there's a thing in us girls...we're the most absorbent though no need to present proves each time....
Men are always protective...actually there are some costumes found at a market which are exactly similar to men...they are worn by beast or I shall say "beastwear"!!...
Jokes apart, you've done real great work dear Dhara...Be blessed :)

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thank you Tahsin. I like the beastwear :) Maybe I'll go to the market today :) ;)

[Neville]

Blimey... someone sure pissed you off... there are so many bigots out there, we must be the only species on this planet that holds unnecessary grudges whilst maintaining, and perpetuating prejudices, fears and ridiculous assumptions based on nothing but ignorance and inadequacy... I'm in your corner if ya need me... Now then, now that you got all that off ya chest and into the open.. I trust you feel so much better... AGT's Neville

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

I always do this. I write it down and move on. This poem was extracted from many experiences real and virtual. I enjoyed writing it! Thank you my friend for your kind appreciation and support always! 💕

[Neville]

an adaptive strategy for sure, and one that I wish more folk would adopt..... Neville

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Indeed Neville! Relegating stuff to paper is far preferred to keeping a cluttered heart 😺

[Neville]

too true.............cluttered hearts just get in the way... N :)

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Irritants they are, there’s so much as that could be done better without them :)

[Neville]

indubitably....

[Mrudula Rani]

It is very sad when preconceptions and abuse ruin a relationship and you are left with so much hurt and asking yourself " how could I let some one break me this way??

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thank you Mridula, we must guard against it.

[Mrudula Rani]

My brother insists that I should spell my name in accordance with Sanskrit, Mridula. I love that spelling, but I am stuck with the Dravidian rendition.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Oh! I correct myself Mrudula! Noted for all future reference. Thank you again.

[Mrudula Rani]

I wasn't correcting you Dhara, I was wallowing in nostalgia.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Oh ok Mrudula. 😄 Have a nice evening then!

[Abdul Aziz]

Wow, I find this very powerful and moving, specially with the #MeToo movement catching fire in India. Your lines are visceral and laced with pain. The language is uniformly fantastic, truly elevating the content. Brilliant!

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thank you Abdul Aziz. I really like your refreshing angle on this poem. Indeed, in the light of the Me Too Movement, these lines could assume a new meaning of their own.

[Anish Gowda]

It's sad when human beings start defining things based on some factors and loose the originality of it. Criticising or considering someone degraded is something which will deteriorate one self as human.
I hope you don't get any more of Such bad experiences. May God bless you.
I commend you for your command over English and the peculiar way of representing it through fantastic words.

[barleygirl]

WOW! WOW! And WOW! This is very powerful & honest writing. I love the way you use repetition with the title line, very effective. You message reminds me of how we often focus critically on our own selves even when the other person is the one being unreasonable. The curse of the accommodating person. This is an original way to show how this feels from a fresh point of view (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

My self-appointed critic ensures I take more than my share of blame for any failure. I guess, its the conditioning and self-esteem one grows up with. More worryingly, it attracts the advantage takers.

Thank you Margie! (((HUGS)))

[Jibey]

A lot of angst and pain in this roll-out of painful reflections on a destructive relationship. But I liked the underlying feeling of defiance, of being blooded but unbowed and there was a kind of satisfaction in pouring out vitriol on the abuser. I loved that powerful comparison with the roadside wenches.. and I was doubly sorry that anyone would despise the beauty of a mocha skin.

Good riddance to such scumbags, I say. Keep on purring.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

I hope I have not offended your feelings, Jibey. Yet I write from my experiences. I did feel a bit inadequate in my skin tone with this guy. Perhaps, it was just an impression. But even if it was, it shoudn't have been. I agree with you...
Thank you for your views...

[Jibey]

No offence, I assure you. I loved it! Glad we agree!

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thanks a lot for the reassurance :)

[Einstein Noodle]

fourth line/verse is the pivot point says i ... the turn ... social commentary subtle yet sharp ... the issue raised and re-raised ... i'm afraid much of it is harming the reality of abuse of women by men ... smart perspective Kat ... putting the reading in the protagonist who sees herself from "his" eyes ...i think the repetition works especially well in this one ... i watched and listened to Hillary Clinton yesterday ...on the news ...defending Bill ... saying that him having sex with Monica was not abuse of power .... i am bewildered by that statement ...the mere fact that one is the boss and the other the hired makes it abuse of power in my mind ... oh well ...the winds blow ...the night gives way to sunrise eh!? .. fantastic poem ... solid strong statement ...love the voice and the speaker inside the eyes of another ..
E.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

This poem was basically written for those with the proverbial speck in the eye attitude for others, E. Those who shoulder no responsibility for the failure of a relationship and consider themselves above blame. Yet they scream murder at the slightest slight.
I'm shocked by what Hillary has to say though, she being an icon for women and all that. It is very disappointing. Seems to me nothing is scared anymore, everything open to manipulation.
Thank you dear E, for stopping by for this poem.

[Einstein Noodle]

leads me to think of the speaker as the speck ;)))) now there is another story ..i am the speck in your eye ...what a mess eh!? yes..i see the universal application of your statement ... those of us that nurture specks are often cowardly .. :( love and peace Dhara ..so nice to be having coffee with you this morning :)

[Fran Marie]

Serious emotions emitted within this intense piece.I feel the broken .
torment and bitterness expressed...always good to purged ones feelings
The hurt and pain..flush it out..nice work Dhara..

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thank you muchly, Fran Marie :)

[fleamailman]

"...one of your best..." smiled the goblin in passing, then adding "...men are not what they were, then mostly they're either cowards who don't approach or beasts who do..."

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Thank you goblin (smiles) It doesn’t pain me, this thing about men. I’m my own cat. I love myself more than any man could or would. I bring me bliss. (Picks up her rucksack and scoots off alone)