A Beautiful Mind.

Um...

I wouldn't call it obsession.

I mean, sure, a small section of one of my bedroom walls is dedicated to them, to him, but it's not obsession.

What can I say? Their music is great. I love every second of every song, even the ones that (comparatively) suck. I love the emotions that come and go with it. And I mean LOVE.

I know. I don't know anything about love. How can I? I'm way too young, right?

Well...

Isn't love when you would die for someone? When you would kill for someone? When they make you happy, and even when you hate them, you still can't stay away from them for too long? Isn't love what you feel when you would do anything for a person, even after they find someone else to marry and with whom to make babies and start families and traditions? And though you're jealous of these other people, you'd still protect them because they make the one you love happy? Or when you still feel these things, regardless of the fact that they don't even know you exist? Is it not love when you feel the same undying waves of attraction to these people/this person for years, still after all the changes they may go through? If this isn't love, then perhaps it is obsession.

Obsession with them.

With him.

With his beautiful mind...

So maybe it's not the music. Not just the music. Because he is breathtakingly gorgeous. Yes, obsession...because I must have spent hours just staring at his face, picking out each and every detail, categorizing in my mind what about his face (and those similar to it) specifically attracts me. His cheekbones. His nose. His lips. The color of his eyes, a perfect blend of cocoa and foliage which makes a hazel just shy of being either brown or green. 

Perhaps it is obsession.

Or perhaps it's the astonishing talent, the disappointment I feel when I realize I could never do something like that, and then not giving a s**t about whether or not I'll ever be that great because who cares? All that matters is that his life is wonderful and he is happy. And, Hell, with a mind as stupefying as his, he deserves it. A mind that not only creates dozens of worlds in which to live, but also has the means to allow people to live in them.

He brings these things to life:

A deep, dark romance where people love each other and care for each other so much, they run together and kill together and for each other.

And he does this with sound.

An alternate reality where one of the greatest minds on the planet is an alien. Where seven children out of forty-three are blessed/cursed with superpowers, taking them and their followers on epic adventures.

He does this with color.

A future where heroes are needed, but having these heroes is breaking the rules. He created an apocalypse (the exact details of which are unimportant), then made his band one of outlaws that we're convinced will save the world

 He does this, too, with sound.

This beautiful mind raised an army, gave his followers multiple universes to play with, became a savior when he tried

(though he believes otherwise), and saved at least one life,

one that will probably never have the opportunity to repay him.

This beautiful mind is the source of my frustration and inspiration. It's the cause and relief of most of my stress. I know I love it, because even when I hate it, he's the one making me hate it, and he's the one that makes me

stop.

He is the John Lennon to my Mark David Chapman (though I have no intention of killing him).

He is the Beatles to me,

plus DaVinci,

with a splash of Beethoven and Mozart's musical talent.

No, he is bigger than that, and by the Beatles' logic, he is bigger than Jesus.

At least to me.

Ah, s**t. 

I really am obsessed, aren't I?

<3

<3

Author's Note

There are at least 3 of you who know who I'm talking about.
Call it what you will- obsession or love. I just...I dunno. Maybe not everyone gets this way about someone in their life. Or maybe this is a specific type of love which applies only to people like celebrities or people you know you'll never have a chance with even though they're constantly in your life.
Eh. Did I at least make you think with this?

Reviews

[Jim Parson]

OK, this is totally scary...ha ha! If anything ever happens to him, make sure and take this down right away, cuz you'll be the prime suspect!

You write well and express yourself even better. This made me think back to all the celebrity crushes of my youth and my own obsession with music...actually, the Beatles. There can be no greater infatuation than being there and living the hysteria as a brand new Beatles album came out.

[gracy ann]

hmmm i have an idea of who it is but not sure.

[Dream Weaver]

A radical write in theory deep in relevance
to the mind.. Obsession: could be, confusion
absolutely…