Pessimist

Here is the narration of a man just deprieved of every hope and love of this nasty world....I HOPE YOU'LL LIKE IT.

The endless, barren life is vain.
Shorn off hope and all disdain.

Only can I hear the solitary voice:
"No reason with you to rejoice!".

My luck pretends never to shine.
"Where will lead the destiny mine!".

The incredulous world to my thought ever,
enlisted my mind in the eccentric fewer.

In the world renounced none to criticize.
Even the upcoming hell not to me a surprise.

The brief statement I only insist:
"No sight is worse than pessimist".

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Hi Pritesh,
Short poems should never be apologised for. It is more difficult to capture emotion and vision in them. You have done a great job here in a lovely poem with good meter and metaphor. You are young you will get over such set backs enjoy life and don't be a victim be a vixen!

[Pritesh]

thanks!

[Jasmine Thurber]

Good poem.I think you did great, I bet you will do a lot better on the next poem you make.hope you have fun writing another phone!a!

[Pritesh]

thanks!

[Rhianne Ney]

I'm a pessimist but not always I've two sides but you can't blame those who are negative-thinkers they have their own reasons

[Jasmine Thurber]

That's actually long.and its a really good poem.I love reading poems.but I love to write poems too!!!!

[True Henry]

A tad Shakespearian for me.... One way to 'modernise' this would be to use metaphors, usjng particular objects such as colors, 'everyday people', cityscapes, household items, etc.

However I must applaud your perspective and it's 'broadness', though I still would love to see some more 'flavour' done to it. I give it a 7 out of 10

Best of luck, my friend.

[MOON]

Poignant write , lovely turn of phrase.

[Pritesh]

thanks!

[Pritesh]

thanks!

[Brandon S. Whitten]

Out of the darkness we all crawl. The journey to see light is excruciating but not futile. Excellent read and write.

[Patricia B. Hepler]

'...The endless barren life my vain,
shorn off hope and all disdain...'

Your unique sentence structure, coupled with your rhyming scheme, makes a very good poem. We-authors, poets, musicians, etc. never apoligise for our creativity because owning our creations is part of our personal uniqueness..

John McFadyen's comment is wise...~ pat

[Leslie Philibert]

Not only clever thoughts, but I really like the couplet form with good rhymes. Nice.

[Kaylor Mason]

I always try to be an optimist, though I'll admit I could look on the bright side of a train wreck sometimes . . . that's not always an asset, though

[Pritesh]

thanks

[Benton "spokenwordsmith..]

Amazingly Powerful! Keep writing...your poetry is changing lives! May God bless you!

[Pritesh]

thanks for the review!