Larry, Skippy & Dick

 

 Larry doesn’t remember much from the last 30 years. As he sat reading his Readers Digest he watched, out of the corner of his eye, "freaks" working on computers. Larry had no need for computers. He knew quite well there were naked women on those computers and that in itself was bad, very bad.

 

 As he read his magazine he came across a photo of Vice-President Dick Cheney. Larry had “checked-out” to the Bug House long before Cheney had become vice-president yet the man’s face conjured an emotion in Larry. Emotions frightened Larry, thus without even knowing the man, Larry was frightened by what Cheney's face represented.

 

  Another face that frightened Larry was a bully from his younger years. Much of Larry's past is hazy at best but he remembers the bully's name was John.  Larry thinks quite possibly he saw John on the street the other day. He doesn’t remember anything in particular about John but the man’s puss-filled face seems to have been forever branded in his memory.

 

 "Fear not the past, the past is the past, and tomorrow is tomorrow, and today is today."  Larry had been working very hard with developing a new outlook on life. “Just keep hold of today and feel good about tomorrow,” was another of Larry’s favorite quotes. His beloved shrink had shared that one with Larry the day he was released. Throughout Larry’s modest apartment Larry posted hundreds of quotes on small yellow post-it notes. Larry loved post-its, almost as much as peanut butter.

 

  All in all, things were starting to look up for Larry. His new apartment offered a bed, a shower, a coffee pot, and even pets were a possibility. Larry was thinking about a cat. Not a big cat, just a kitty-sized cat. Larry pondered the thought of cats in different sizes? Maybe if he only fed them every other day they might stay the size he liked. He’d have to be sure though to keep his peanut butter supply safely out of sight. Larry pondered; do cats like peanut butter? The more Larry pondered the more Larry realized, he didn’t need a cat.

 

 As for birds, that was another story. Larry loved birds almost as much as peanut butter. One of the first things he did in acclimating himself to his new neighborhood was to find a suitable park to his liking. He wanted a park with trees and birds and just the right bench. After having tried every single bench in the park Larry settled on “his” bench. From 2 to 5 p.m., rain or shine, this bench became Larry’s bench. There was no mistaking Larry’s bench for it had pinecones slathered in peanut butter dangling underneath. Using fishing wire Larry obsessively dangled pinecones covered in peanut butter from the nearby trees. The birds loved them. Not only were the cones covered with a generous amount of Skippy’s peanut butter, Larry also rolled them in birdseed as a final treat. The pinecones were always pecked completely clean by the next day and Larry made it his “job” to replenish the cones.

 

 Sometimes Larry even dabbed a bit of peanut butter onto his toes. Those walking by did their best to ignore the grown man with pigeons nibbling at his toes. A harmless indulgence when you consider what some freaks on computers get into these days. Unfortunately it wasn’t harmless enough. Someone named John complained that Larry was becoming an unsightly public nuisance.

 

 The day the cop arrived the pit of Larry’s stomach began to churn savagely. His feet were stuck to the ground, frozen in fear. "Not another trip to the Bug House, please, not another trip to the Bug House", Larry pleaded to no avail.

 

 Later, back in the hospital Larry confided with his beloved shrink that all he could remember on that fateful day in the park was the face of Dick Cheney slowly approaching him carrying a gun. The shrink grinned and mused, mostly to himself, "That could scare a lot of people."

Reviews

I love this piece, it is quite deep and within itself and shows what people consider to be a nuisance and what others don't- what's wrong with the world today!
anyways, very good write- Larry is innocent! xx