And then it was peaceful..

I was talking to a good friend of mine, and he gave me the inspiration to write this. He was telling me about in his Creative Writing class they do workshops where they give you the first sentence and you go from there. So..here is what I came up with whe

And then it was peaceful. No more white noise, no more silent treatment, no more tension flowing through the air. Noise, everywhere. Wind rustling through the trees, a snap of a twig, the movement of creature moving through the underbrush. The air; pushing out of my lungs, sucking more inside in rapid, craved breaths. My pulse,a constant drumming. I can feel it in every step I take. My muscles, screaming at me from the inside. Every step, I feel more alive than the next, actual feeling. No more feeling invisible. No more getting screamed at for being home, for doing drugs, for drinking..I was here, truly here. Alive. My body screams for attention, and yet I do not heed to it's desires. I am tired of it all; all the silent hatred, all the name calling; theirs and my own. All those chants in my head..even my own mind betrays.
 

“you'll never be good enough..”

“you are nothing but a f**k-up”

“who could ever love you?”

But now, it is peaceful. My body not moving..yet feeling. Laying on solid ground, feeling nothing and everything all at once. Every muscle in my body violently twitching..my heartbeat pulsating for all it's worth. The beat, so loud in my ears, yet not a sound rings in the air. Every blade of grass feels like a needle, embedding itself into my charred remains of a creature. I feel like I am burning alive. Feeling every emotion, every feeling rushing at me all at once. Hot, tingling tears roll down my face, yet I cannot move. My vision blurs, though I do not know I am seeing at all. Feeling..pain, fear, happiness. Everything covering me like a curtain, blocking me from the world. I can feel every movement from around me. The single step of an ant feels like a lifetime. A single blink of an eye feels like everything is rushing in on me all at once. I see a face above me, and I freeze. I am reaching out, trying with every power in my being to reach that, to feel once again. The face, it smiles, and reaches out a hand towards my direction. I know that face; happiness. Everything good in life. Joy; that feeling a small child has at the littlest of things. I fight, everything in me yearns for that...true feeling. That state of sweet oblivion.

I reach. I fall. I get up. I try again.

Finally, I reach it. And everything seems well in the world.  I reach out once again, and I am one with the smiling face. The happiness, the joy..it all rushes towards me at once.

I freeze though nothing is wrong. I am at one with myself. I look down, my hands look the same. Everything is well with who I am now. I look down upon the shell of everything I was. All I see is crimson. My arms, my legs..pouring out from my very core. The ground, once so clean, crisp green is now a muddy red. The soil, seeping up what is left of my life. A flutter from my eyelids and it seems gravity is pulling me in again. I use what force in me to remain where I am; this state of bliss with nothing else. I fight with myself once again, gripping everything but air. Everything rushes towards me again, and yet again I have to fight to remain in this oblivion; where everything is right, colors shout at me from the heavens. And again, a face smiles at me from above, urging me on. Every emotion rushes in on me again; pain, fear, happiness, joy, love..and I smile weakly. It seems like a century before eager eyes look up to the heavens above me. The sky, such sweet drops falling from your lips. It seems the angels amid the stars are crying; but for what purpose? For this shell; this body? Or for me to return to them, to be in a peaceful bliss?

A bird flies up above..black as death. So regal, so powerful. He speaks to me in tongues I cannot understand. My mind reels, my vision begins to blur, to become black; just as he is. I feel as if a huge gust of wind pulls me out, and before I can think, I am looking down again. Colors pulsating behind my eyes, and I open them to find the raven, black as the night, every feather gorgeous beyond my wildest imagination. He speaks, yet again, but before I can hear his words, everything distorts again. Colors stuck between vibrant and gray. Stuck in a muddy, blurred consciousness. Water drips from the heavens, washing away the crimson mess of my skin. I am stuck in this in between: I know right and wrong, where feeling everything and nothing is endless. A veil where I can feel all; pain, rushing at me all at once, and the screeching of a black bird up above. Before I blink, and I feel as if I am fighting to get out again, to get back to where I feel I belong, in this paradise that keeps getting ripped from me. I fight, with every fiber of my existence, and yet I am stuck in this in between. Feeling all, yet feeling nothing. A ripping, stabbing, tingling pain, sounds fill my ears, yet no one is around. I turn my eyes to the heavens, and scream for all I'm worth. Not a sound comes from my lips. A single breath leaves, and floats up towards the skies. I soar up to meet it. A scream echos through my ears, a single trace of what is left of the remains. A single black feather falls from the skies to meet with the muddy, broken shell that lies below.

Reviews

[Syldor]

It's very good. There were a few grammatical errors but that's nothing. The writing was very strong and it was a very creative. I liked it^^