Pride

Ted came to when he felt a slap across his face and water splash him. He sat up suddenly, slamming his head against the bottom of his desk. "Ah!" he cried out, cradling his face in his hands, though he had to move them as he started coughing up water. Groaning, the teen crawled out from under his desk.

He stared in awe at the grown man floating in his room. The man was grinning, not unlike the Cheshire Cat, and was laying on his side languidly - except he wasn't laying on anything. Just floating. He had a shock of pure white hair and was impeccably dressed in a lush orange suit with corresponding pants and tie. "You passed out before I could properly insult you, kid," said the floating man.

"Who are you?" Ted asked, seriously considering crawling back under the desk. He thought that this might be a dream, but it felt much too vividly clear. He looked around his room to clarify that everything was indeed startlingly clear.

The well-dressed man ignored Ted's question. "I mean, why are you summoning me with candles and burlap? This is the twenty-first century! Show me some class; put that summoning circle on some silk." The room seemed to go past silence, like all sound was being sucked out when the man finished speaking. Ted cowered further under his desk. The man seemed not to notice this. "Hey, what's your name, kid?" The white-haired man swooped in closer to Ted curiously.

"Ted," the teen whispered.

The man shoved his hand forward almost aggressively. "Nice to meetcha, Theodore!"

"Please don't call me Theodo-"

"Listen up, Teddy. Now, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say you don't understand what's going on because you didn't think anything would actually happen. Amiright?"

"Just Ted would be fine-"

"Of course I'm right!" The man laughed and an earthquake seemed to overtake Ted's room. The man floated backwards, which the teen took as an invitation to crawl out from under his desk. "You see kid, I'm-"

"Did you slap me?" Ted asked, rubbing his cheek.

The man looked at Ted impatiently, lips pressed together silently. The teen shuffled his feet awkwardly. "Don't interrupt me."

"Sorry," Ted muttered quietly, feeling much like a child scolded.

The man's grin came back suddenly, teeth flashing in a sign of possibly maniacal joy. "As I was saying, I'm a demon! Good job summoning me. Now, you have questions, yes? Yes! Am I going to hurt you? No. You helped me, so I’ll play nice. Slaps don’t count," he added quickly when Ted began to open his mouth. "What can I do? Anything! I’m a being of pure energy! What do I want? Absolutely nothing! You keep me around, and in return, I'll grant you whatever wish you want. Did I miss anything?"

Ted waited until he was sure the man was done speaking before he took his turn. "What's your name?"

The man laughed, thought Ted wasn’t sure what was so funny, gliding down to land gracefully on the ground. "That depends on what language you speak. You would know me as Pride." Pride's grin spread wider, his sharp canines showing threateningly.

"You mean like... one of the seven deadly sins?"

Pride stepped closer to Ted and booped his nose with a close-mouthed smirk. "Spot on, Teddy-boy! I am a demon of the seven deadly sins; more so I am that which the others spawned from. But more on that later. Let's get our deal straight."

Ted frowned, stepping around the supposed demon to sit on his ned. "What deal? I just wanted to summon you to prove that magic... isn't real-"

"Well that was counterintuitive-"

"But I don't want you to stay. I'm not even sure I do believe you're real. Can't I send you back?"

Pride's smirk fell slowly, replaced by a heavy frown. "No, I don't think you quite understand, kid. See, I come from a place - think of it like a business! It's nice to be at a business when you're on top, right? But it's not all that grand when you're working on the first floor. But, you can get to the top. You can work your way up, or you can start your own business. Right now, I'm working at the bottom. And I really don't feel like doing that. So I'm starting my own business!"

Ted chewed his lip. "I'm not sure what you mean."

Pride shrugged. "Well that's really not important. What's important is that you understand that you summoned me from a place where I was not very high up. But now I'm in a place where I can be very high up - thanks to you. So I want to stay here." Pride paused to breathe in a lungful of air. "Here's the deal. You let me stay, and I'll grant you any wishes you want."

Ted was not some silly character in a book. He was a sensible young man. He had no silly wish to be followed around by a demon. "But I have everything I want. I would really rather just send you back-"

Ted reached towards the tattered book from Mick’s, but Pride was quicker, and he beat the teen to the book.A grimace spread across the demon's face, his teeth sharpening and his features darkening. Ted drew back from Pride fearfully. "How about we make a different deal, then," he grit through his teeth. "You don't send me back, and I won't kill your sister."

You could hear a pin drop in the silence that followed. Pride's grimace spread into a grin again, sending a shiver down Ted's spine. As the seconds ticked by, Ted cleared his throat and opened his mouth to speak. Then the motion of the teen's doorknob turning sparked him in motion. He was rushing to hide Pride, maybe to shove him behind the opening door, but before he could reach the demon, Pride's body shifted. It minimized and sprouted white fur.

The little white field mouse bounced into the pocket of Ted's pants. Alice appeared from behind his door. "Hey, you want broccoli and ham with your mac and cheese?" she asked. Ted's mouth opened and closed like a fish as he struggled to speak through the shock of the demon's words. "Why do you look so guilty?" Alice asked, face scrunching in thought.

Ted shoved his hands in his pockets, one of them stroking the soft fur rustling around between the demin. "Sorry, I was just thinking... I just thought I might have forgotten some homework at school and-and it's math, so you know, I can't do it without the textbook." He laughed nervously and, after a short pause, added a feeble, "darn."

Alice's expression only grew more contorted as her apparent confusion furthered. "Ted... your math class is online. Your homework is on your computer."

"Oh! Silly me! You're right, yeah, broccoli and ham sounds good," Ted said, ending with a mutter.

"Are you feeling okay?" Alice stepped wholly into her brother's room, approaching him to press the back of her hand against his forehead. A frown fixed over her features, though the rest of her face relaxed. "Bro, you're burning up. You feeling okay? You need to stay home from school tomorrow?"

Ted shook his hand and attempted to smile. His thumb stroked the mouse inside his pocket, seeking reassurance. "I'll be alright. It's just been a long day. I'll feel better after some sleep."

Alice smiled at her brother. "If you say so. Mac will be ready in ten minutes."

With that, she left the room, and Ted pulled the mouse out of his pocket to look it in the eye. "I'll let you stay. I won't tell anyone you exist. But please don't touch my sister."

The mouse jumped up and flipped backwards out of Ted's hand. He expanded suddenly and Pride appeared in his human form again. "Sounds good, Teddy. But you've wasted a lot of time talking to me," he said gazing down at his bare wrist as if reading a watch. "You're behind on that English essay."

"Oh yeah," Ted muttered, glancing over at his computer with a tired gaze. He rubbed his eyes and yawned. He wasn't sure why he was feeling so tired. He usually had a good couple hours left before he was called to bed by sleep. "I feel so drained. I really don't want to do that thing."

"You're tired because of all of the energy you put into that summoning," Pride commented idly. "I'm surprised you did that considering you don't- didn't believe in magic. Anyway, I'll take care of that essay for you, kiddo." The demon snapped his fingers and Ted watched as a brobdingnagian quantity of words appeared on his computer screen, words composing themselves of their own accord into a well-written essay.

"Oh. Thanks," said Ted.

Pride's grin spread wide again, his sharp teeth flashing threateningly. "Don't sweat it, kid. I'm a being of pure energy. I can do anything. Just about anything." Ted opened his mouth to ask about the restrictions on the demon's powers when Pride spoke up again. "Dinner time, Teddy!"

His body began to minimize again as the doorknob to Ted's room started turning. This time, he seemed to turn into nothingness and disappear altogether. Alice entered Ted's room with a bowl of mac and cheese and the trunk from a stalk of broccoli.

"Dinner's ready. I know you're busy, so you can eat in your room tonight. And I've got a meeting tomorrow, so we'll have to leave early for school tomorrow. Oh, and I saved the trunk for you."

Ted took the food from his sister, taking a generous bite out of the broccoli's trunk. "Thanks, Alice. You're the best."

Alice smiled, but left without a word.

Ted started rolling up the burlap he'd Summoned Pride on and picked up the old book Pride had dropped when he disappeared. He was about to power down his desktop when a weight suddenly appeared on his head, forcing him down and causing him to fall to the ground. He struggled with the weight of whatever was sitting on his back.

"Sorry, kid!" Pride laughed. "I was just hopping around in your hair as a flea when I started to turn back. It's hard to remember how physics work when they don't exist where I'm from." Pride laughed again, still sitting on Ted's back.

Ted didn't believe for a second that Pride had done that on accident. "Would you get off me now? I want to eat dinner." The weight on his back disappeared, and Ted stood up to face Pride, floating and grinning as per usual.

The teenager ignored the demon as he followed him to his bed. He ignored Pride when he sat across from him on his bed. He didn't ignore him when he continued to stare at Ted when he started eating his mac and cheese.

"Pride," said Ted, putting his fork down and taking a bite of his trunk of broccoli. "Stop staring at me. What do you want?"

Pride grinned again, but Ted got the sense that this one was not nearly as confident as before. "Last time I roamed the earth, humans hadn't figured out manufacturing dairy products yet. And they certainly hadn't learned how to manufacture grain into elbow-shaped noodles." The demon plucked a cheesy noodle form Ted's bowl, squishing it between his fingers. Now he smiled, an honest, amused smile.

Ted's face pinched in thought . He was having a hard time pinning anything down about this demon. One minute, he resonated the power of an ancient being. Next thing Ted knew, he was talking to a child. "You... Want a bite?" Ted held his bowl towards the man.

Pride looked at the mac and cheese as if it might have offended him. "Oh no, I don't require sustenance." Pride shook his head, waving a hand at Ted.

"I get that. I asked if you want some. You know, to taste it." He urged the bowl closer to Pride, attempting a smile.

The demon took the bowl of cheese and noodles from Ted hesitantly, fiddling with the fork idly before spearing a couple noodles. He poked the clump of food with his tongue and Ted tried not to laugh. Pride opened his mouth to eat the mac and cheese, but stopped noticing Ted's expression. "What?" he demanded impatiently, like an offended child.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just funny. You're like a kid trying new food, but you're in the body of an adult! Eat it. I promise I won't judge." Ted held his hands up defensively. Pride's glare from Ted didn't waver, and the teen reached forward, grabbing the fork in the demon's hand and shoving the mac and cheese into his mouth. He withdrew the fork quickly so Pride didn't bite down on it.

The demon chewed thoughtfully. His eyes moved to the the broccoli trunk in Ted's hand. "Hey, Teddy-Bear, what's that in your hand?" He plucked another noodle from the bowl with his fingers, ignoring the fork, and popped it into his mouth.

Ted's face scrunched. "Please don't call me that."

Pride ate another noodle in silence, eyes not moving from Ted.

"It's a part of a stalk of broccoli. A lot of people just throw it away when they cut the little broccoli trees off, but I like eating it." Ted took two big bites out of the aforementioned vegetation to finish it off. "Pride, don't call me Teddy-Bear. It sounds like a pet name."

This time, Pride plunged his face into the mac and cheese to eat more of the noodles.

Ted grabbed the bowl and frantically tore it away from the demon. "Would you not? Unlike you, I need to eat to survive. And I can't just tell Alice I need more food because a demon ate mine."

Pride looked mildly annoyed. "Teddy-Bear is a pet name. You're my pet. I want more mac and cheese, Teddy."

Ted had a strong urge to fight about this whole being-a-demon's-pet thing, but Pride's voice threatening Alice's life rang out clearly in his mind. "I'll make you some mac and cheese tomorrow after school. But I can't have you stealing all of my food, okay? I need to eat."

The demon pouted, but did not stop Ted from finishing his mac and cheese. Apparently deciding he was bored, Pride started floating upwards, then towards Ted's closet. The teen watched him carefully as Pride pushed aside the curtain. He went about going through Ted's clothes, magically copying the clothes he picked up onto his body.

As Ted watched Pride thoughtfully, he wondered exactly what can of beans he'd opened. Was he prepared to entertain a demon for god-knows-how-long? And what did this creature want? How dangerous was he?

Author's Note

In Steven's mind, Garnet has no nose... Heh.