What part of my prodigal’s sin do I own?

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#walkhumbly #itsnotaboutyou

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Thank you for your patience and your grace.

To my readers:

Little did I know when I began to write several weeks ago about walking humbly with our God that I was about to have a lesson in humility that I will never forget. I was about to face a storm that would test everything I believe about God, about His mercy, and about my purpose. When “the roof fell in,” I was devastated beyond my ability to tell you…so devastated, in fact, that I couldn’t even write.

I know I have a responsibility to the precious, hurting people who read my blog. And I sincerely ask your forgiveness if you came looking for comfort and it was not there. Without making excuses, I’ll remind you that some things really are disasters, and when they come we can only do what we can do.

My heart is still broken, and I don’t know how God is going to work this situation out for my good and His glory. But I believe with all my heart that when I can’t see God’s hand, I can trust His heart.

Thank you for your patience and your grace.

Rita

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What part of my prodigal’s sin do I own? 

#walkhumbly #itsnotaboutyou

Micah 6:8 “…and what doth the Lord require of thee…but to walk humbly with thy God?”

If you read my blog, you know I firmly believe that some things really are disasters including and maybe especially those things that involve our kids or grandkids. When disasters happen and we are reminded of every mistake we’ve ever made and of every sin, how can we help but ask ourselves if we’re to blame?

After weeks of soul-wrenching grief, the kind that steals your joy, your peace and even your hope, I’ve come to some conclusions. They fit loosely into three categories: Our Past, Our Prodigal, and Our Path. As we look at these over the next few days, my prayer is that you will own what is yours, let go of what isn’t, and remember that God has a plan and purpose for your life including the tragedies.

Our Past: Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we came to adulthood without baggage? But it doesn’t work that way, of course. All of us bring to marriage and parenting our own “spontaneous dysfunction.” Many of us, including me, did not come to know the Lord until we were adults. Not knowing any better, we did the best we could with what we had. Besides that, we were and are broken people and, as long as we live, sin “will be present with us.” (Rom 7:21)

I would give my very life to undo some of the mistakes I made in the past. Wouldn’t you? But we can’t and, like David, we may be saying, “My sin is ever before me.” (Ps 51:3) As much as that hurts and as miserable as that makes me sometimes, I’m not sure it’s a bad thing. The prophet Jeremiah said that when he “remembered his misery, the wormwood and the gall” that his soul was humbled within him. (Lam 3:19) And anything that reminds me it’s all about grace is a good thing.

Remembering who and what we are, remembering how often we ignored the call of God, remembering how many times we’ve failed and even chosen to do the wrong thing…how can we possibly find peace or be used of God? The answer is simple. All of us…all of us fall short of the mark. Separate from grace, we have nothing to offer. It’s not part grace and part effort. It isn’t all grace when we trust Christ and from then on it’s up to us. It’s all grace all the time, every day, every hour, every minute.

Would I do things differently if I could do them over? Of course I would. And so would you. And I make better choices today and do the right thing more often. But the real problem was never what I did or what you did. It was what and who we are. We are broken, fallen creatures.

In humility, I can accept that I’m broken…“that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing.” (Rom 7:18) When I realize that and take a hard, honest look at the real Rita, I have to say, “It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed…” And then I can remind myself that, “His mercy and compassion are new every morning.” (Lam 3:22-23)

Did you blow it? Of course, you did. So did I. And all the excuses in the world don’t make it ok. But if we have confessed it, forsaken it, made amends to the best of our ability, maybe it’s time to forgive ourselves and let it go. Maybe it’s time to let the past be in the past.

Challenge for Today: What might happen if we, just for today, chose to forgive ourselves and accept God’s grace for the mistakes and sins of the past?