How can it be good for me to be afflicted?

Here's the Precious Prodigal post for August 05, 2014: How can it be good for me to be afflicted? #lessonlearned #onceburned Please "Share" using this "ShortLink" = http://bit.ly/1pWdOoY

Psalm 119:71 "It is good for me that I have been afflicted"

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if our prodigals learned from the mistakes other people make? But that isn’t the way it happens, is it? Our prodigals learn from making their own mistakes and facing the painful consequences of them. And so do you and I.

Change isn’t easy for anyone. In fact, it hurts, and the unfortunate truth is that the only way we change is when it hurts more to remain the same. It’s why the prodigal “came to himself” in the far country and realized he needed to go home. (Luke 15:17)

Our prodigals won’t be motivated to do anything different until they reap some painful but natural consequences for their choices. That’s why the psalmist wrote, “Before I was afflicted I went astray; but now have I kept thy word.” (Psalm 119:71) If substance abuse is involved, remembering the pain and insanity is an important part of their recovery program.

Our prodigals aren’t the only ones who need to remember their mistakes and learn from them. It’s no less insane for us to keep doing the same things over and over again expecting different results than it is for them. Proverbs 24:16 says even a “just” or “righteous” man falls seven times and rises again, so it’s not just about sin. That verse tells me errors in judgment can be treacherous as well.

We’ve made a few of those…errors in judgment about our prodigal, I mean. Haven’t we? We’ve paid their electric bill, bailed them out of jail, and even paid their fines and court costs. We’ve replaced furniture and cars, interceded with their spouses, and let them move home when that spouse finally had enough and kicked them out. I’ve learned to call that “buying them another relapse kit.”

We’ve “loaned” them money we never saw again, paid for their lawyers and pleaded with judges and probation officers to give them just “one more chance.” And we’ve done all those things believing the lies we’ve believed so many times before and telling ourselves they have “finally learned their lesson.” Worse than anything else, we’ve let them steal our serenity, our peace and our joy.

And we haven’t done all those things just once, have we? For some of us, this has gone on for decades. Like our prodigals, eventually it might hurt enough that we consider doing things differently. When we do finally draw that line in the sand, it will be a challenge to do things differently.

It won’t be easy to stop bailing our prodigals out, especially when we’ve been doing it for a long time. Remembering that “helping” them never worked in the past will help us stand firm when we’re asked to do those things again. While learning those lessons wasn’t enjoyable, remembering them will help us say, “It was good for me that I was afflicted.” And remembering those lessons is one of the things we need to hold fast.

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, remind yourself that sometimes “helping” isn’t helping?