Precious Prodigal

October 9, 2013: Has God forgotten me and my broken heart? Please “Share” this link to a new Precious Prodigal Blog: http://preciousprodigal.com/blog/blog=index.html

Sept 27: Have I disappointed God with my shaky faith? (Includes "Some Thoughts on Faith")

Ephesians 6:16 “Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.”

The next item in our armor is the “shield of faith.” It’s the first one that tells us clearly about its purpose. It will allow us to “quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.” The Roman shield was large enough to protect the soldier’s entire body. But it was made of wood and was vulnerable to fire. So before any battle, the soldier would soak that shield in water until it was saturated. When the enemy shot flaming arrows at him, his shield both stopped them and put the fire out. What was translated as “the wicked” in my beloved KJV is better translated “the wicked one” or Satan.

Several things came to mind as I thought about this verse. The first is the reminder of who our enemy really is. It isn’t our family that doesn’t understand our pain or the people who have gossiped about us or hurt us in other ways. It isn’t even our prodigal, although it may sometimes feel that way. The enemy is Satan, and our entire perspective would change if we could really grasp that truth. It might stop us from raging at the prodigal, blaming others and ourselves, or harboring those resentments deep in our hearts.

The second is that no matter how strong we thought our faith was, that faith can really take a beating when someone we love is breaking our hearts. That’s especially true when our prodigal has been acting out for a long time. How do we keep on trusting God and believing He is going to work things out for our good and His glory? And have we disappointed God with our shaky faith?

Mark 9 tells the story of a father and his desperate cry for his child. The disciples had tried but failed to help him, and he appealed to Jesus. When Jesus told him all things were possible if he believed, this poor Dad cried out with tears, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” (Mark 9:24) I can really identify with that man as belief and unbelief warred within his soul. Can’t you? But Jesus honored his faith, however small and shaky it was. If He did it for this father, won’t He do the same for you and for me?

Some Thoughts on Faith

My shaky faith, one of those fickle things…

just when I need it most, it spreads its wings

to fly away and leave me in despair

and saying in my heart, “Does my God care?”

And yet I know He’s helped me in the past.

So why don’t memories of those times last?

My heart should trust a God, who knows my name.

And yet I don’t, so fear is mixed with shame

that I so quickly stagger in dismay,

forgetting that He helped me yesterday.

And then I turn, my desperation great,

to God’s own Word, where He does not berate.

Instead He offers solace there and peace,

commands the waves and raging wind to cease.

I learn that there were those who came before,

who doubted when beset with troubles sore.

I read of those who doubted with relief

and know that God will help my unbelief.

And so with trembling faith, however small,

I go to Him, the One who knows it all.

I tell Him of my fear and of my doubt,

and of the pain that brought it all about.

Then only as our God can somehow do,

He holds me close…for He already knew.

Challenge for Today:  Can you, just for today, be gentle with yourself if your faith is shaky? Can you go to God with the small amount of faith you have?

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Sept 30: The Shield of Faith Part II

Ephesians 6:16 “Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.”

 If we are going to still be standing when the battle we are facing is over, it’s going to be because we have some protection. Make no mistake about it…Satan is a powerful foe.  Because we love a prodigal, we’ve seen his destructive handiwork up close and personal, and we have no problem believing he is stronger than our prodigal. But he is also stronger than you and me. If we’re going to survive this battle, it’s going to be because our armor has protected us. And that shield of faith is perhaps the most powerful protection of them all.

We’ve already seen and acknowledged that our faith can take a beating when someone we love is acting out. What we thought was strong and determined faith doesn’t look all that strong and determined in the midnight hours when we see no hope, when we have cried and prayed for weeks, for months, maybe even for years. If you’re like me, you’ve found that your faith in your prodigal, in yourself, and even in God has been shaken. It’s probably not dead, but it could almost certainly apply for disability.

How do we take that small amount of bruised and battered faith and cause it to grow? You will recall the Roman soldier immersed his shield in water before the battle. Since water in Scripture often represents the Word of God, the answer isn’t hard to figure out. We grow our faith by immersing ourselves in the Word of God. Simplistic? Perhaps. But it’s the solution because “Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.” (Rom. 10:17) Every recovery program, whether secular or faith-based, applies this truth by saying, “Improved our conscious contact with God through prayer and meditation.”

When your life is in turmoil and your heart is breaking, that isn’t the time to stay out of church or to stop praying and reading your Bible. That’s the time to just saturate every part of your life with the Word of God. For me, that means setting my clock an hour or so early so I can spend some time reading my Bible and in prayer. If I don’t do it first thing in the morning, I’m not disciplined enough to do it later. And I desperately need it. If mornings won’t work for you, find a time that does and do it faithfully whether you are “feeling” it or not. Purposeful, determined reading of and listening to the preaching of God’s Word are the “Miracle Gro” for your faith and for mine. And they work.

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, spend some time in reading your Bible and in prayer and meditation? Can you ask God to help your faith to grow?

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Oct 4: How can I fight back if I love a prodigal?

Eph 6: 17  “And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

We’ve been talking about putting on the whole armor of God so we can continue to stand in the tough times. So far, all the items have been defensive…shields, helmets, shoes, belts, breastplates…each one is for defending ourselves. The first and only offensive weapon mentioned is the sword of the Spirit, and Ephesians 6 tells us that sword is the “word of God.”

There is strength in knowing our weaknesses. At least there is for me. Knowing I don’t have to be a tower of strength in every circumstance gives me the freedom to look for strength outside myself. I often find that strength in reading my Bible. Today I read that Hannah, who was barren and prayed for a son, wept and poured out her broken heart before the Lord. Her lips were moving, but she wasn’t making a sound…God saw and heard the prayer of her heart when she couldn’t even say the words out loud. If God saw her heart, I can be sure and so can you that He sees ours as well.

When I don’t know how I ought to pray or I don’t have the words or I think my words are awkward and don’t get past the ceiling, I can claim the promise that the Holy Spirit will make intercession for me with “groanings that cannot be uttered.” (Romans 8:26) When I think there is no way out of this wilderness, I can remember that someday I will “come up out of the wilderness, leaning on the arm of my beloved.” (Song of Solomon 8:5)

The list could go on and on, but the point remains the same. When Satan, my prodigal, other people or even my own doubts attack me, I can fight back with the promises found in Scripture. There’s comfort in the Psalms and instruction in the Proverbs and promises throughout from Genesis to Revelation if I will just take the time to look for them. I both use and love the mediation books. However, none of them can take the place of arming myself with the word of God.

For me, that means getting up early so I can read my Bible and pray before I start my day. If I don’t, I’m simply not disciplined enough to do it later. I have an index card that I look at each time before I start reading. That card lists these questions. Does this day’s reading give me: a promise to claim? a sin to confess? an attribute of God to embrace? an instruction to follow? As I read, I write the answers down, and they become offensive weapons with which to protect myself. It may not be the best plan for anyone else, but it works for me. And I need something to work for me if I intend to still be standing when this battle is over.

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, work out a plan for yourself so you can begin to arm yourself with the “sword of the Spirit” by reading and applying the word of God?

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Oct 7: How can I survive the pain of loving a prodigal?

Ephesians 6:13 “Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.”

We’ve taken a look at the whole armor of God, examined each piece carefully, and seen the benefit of every part whether defensive or offensive. Now the question is, “Why?” I mean putting on that armor is time consuming, and our lives are already pretty full and hectic if we love a prodigal. Why do we need to put on that armor every day? What is the purpose? I was always “that” kid who had to know the reason for everything. Judging from the last few sentences I’ve typed, I’m still that way. I don’t mind putting out the effort if there’s a purpose. But is there a purpose? And if there is a purpose, what is it?

We find a two-fold purpose in Ephesians 6. The first purpose for that armor is so we can “withstand in the evil day.” Withstand. An interesting word that means, “To remain undamaged or unaffected by.” It also means to resist. One of the most frustrating things about loving a prodigal is that we so often feel helpless. We can’t fight their habits or addictions, we can’t fight their destructive behavior, and we sometimes can’t fight our own discouragement. Some days it seems like our prodigal is on a destructive downward spiral that seems certain to destroy him and us as well. But it doesn’t have to be that way. While we can’t make the choices for our prodigals, we can certainly make some choices for ourselves.

Grief and sorrow change people, and those changes are not always for the better. But we also have some choices about that. The sign outside our church says, “Will trouble cause you to use your faith or to lose your faith?” Good question. And the answer is: it depends on whether you are putting on the whole armor of God. When those heartaches come, when we have done all we can, when we’ve prayed until we have no voice or tears left, we’re going to need the whole armor of God if we’re going to keep on keeping on. More than that, we’re going to need that armor if we are going to withstand…that is to remain undamaged by the chaos around us.

How is loving that prodigal affecting you? Are you becoming resentful and bitter? Have you become a captive in the prison you’ve made for yourself with those resentments? Have you given up on your prodigal, yourself and even giving up on God? Yet again, it doesn’t have to be that way. When heartaches come…and they will…they are going to change you. They’re going to change me. However, the choice of whether they will damage us or cause us to grow is ours.

Making the right choice, and putting on that armor will cause us to still be standing when the battle is over. And without the full armor of God to protect us, we may survive, but we’ll be so damaged that we’ll become the walking wounded for the rest of our lives. I want more than that. Don’t you?

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, put on every piece of that armor of God so you will not be damaged in the battle you are facing…so that you will, “having done all will stand?

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Oct 9: Has God forgotten me and my broken heart?

John 11:21 “Then said Martha unto Jesus, Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died."

When someone we love is acting out in destructive ways, it affects the entire family. Often, alcohol or drug abuse are involved in that acting out. But even if it’s not, that kind of behavior doesn’t happen in a vacuum.  Relationships are damaged…sometimes even totally broken. And where home should be a haven for us, it has turned into a battleground instead. You may be asking yourself why God hasn’t intervened. Has He forgotten about you? Wouldn’t He show up and do something if He really cared?

Those are the unspoken questions in John 11. Jesus had been very close to Lazarus, Mary and Martha and had often spent time in their home. Now Lazarus was sick, and his sisters sent a message asking Jesus to come. Jesus didn’t go right away, and Lazarus died. I can only imagine how overwhelmed Mary and Martha must have been and how disappointed that Jesus had not come in time. Didn’t He love them anymore? Had they made a mistake in thinking they were intimate friends? Could they not rely on Him? Some of that frustration and discouragement shows in Martha’s statement, almost a rebuke, in John 11:21, "...Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died."

Of course, she was the "unspiritual" sister of Luke 10:42, right? The one to whom Jesus said, "Mary hath chosen that good part..." by sitting at His feet to learn about spiritual things. So what’s going on with this "spiritual" sister, Mary? In John 11:32, Mary said exactly the same thing as Martha. These two ladies had lost their beloved brother, and they were overwhelmed and discouraged. More than that, they were asking themselves and even asking Jesus, “Where were You when we needed You?”

Verse 33 tells us that "when Jesus saw her weeping...he groaned in his spirit," and He Himself wept. Jesus knew the end of the story as they did not, and He knew He would raise Lazarus from the dead But He was moved with compassion for these hurting women. In just the same way, Jesus cares when our world is upside down, our hearts are broken, and our spirits are wounded. He’s not put off by our questions, not even when we doubt His love or faithfulness.

Like Mary and Martha, we can’t see the whole…only our own small part. We can’t see that when the story is finished, it’s going to be a “finish” that will be for our good and God’s glory. We may forget that God’s plan isn’t to harm us; it’s to prosper us, to give us hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11). Until that happens, my hurting friend, your tears and mine are a language of their own. And you can know that just as Jesus wept with these sisters, he weeps with us when our hearts are discouraged, when we can’t see any solution, when we have no hope that things will be different. That’s the time He says to us, “be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, ask God to heal your wounded spirit and trust Him? Can you believe He cares and that His timing is perfect?

Author's Note

October 9, 2013:
Has God forgotten me and my broken heart?
Please “Share” this link to a new Precious Prodigal Blog:
http://preciousprodigal.com/blog/blog=index.html