Medicinal Sanity

A poem about healing

Medicinal clarity,
sanity in a pill.
Numbing synapses,
so that you won’t feel.

The pain’s a mirage,
remembering to forget.
The memories are real,
they just haven’t happened yet.

Rinsing to repeat,
swallow the green flake.
Ignore the static pictures,
of your past mistakes.

I cannot deny,
that it truly does work.
My brain was a wreck,
full of blackness and murk.

The problem is the memories,
that haunt me every day.
S**t I did in that state,
that’s fucked in every way.

How do you explain,
that you were truly insane?
That every instance,
was a fight with your brain.

How do you tell,
that you were killing yourself?
You just did it with bottles,
on a 90 proof shelf.

How do you accept love,
when you hate who you are?
When even suicide failed,
after you drank the whole bar.

The point is you don’t,
you just keep moving on.
You try to make today count,
and look toward the dawn.

Perfection doesn’t matter,
it’s moving on from the fall.
Slowly gaining your sanity,
and climbing the wall.

So ya take your pills,
and get better for you.
The rest will come back,
you just need see it through.

Be proud of the person,
that you’re trying to be.
Cut yourself some slack,
for your own sanity.

Accept your insanity,
so you can finally move on.
Just realize that acceptance,
isn’t the same as gone.

Healing takes time,
you’re insane after all.
So swallow the pills,
and break down the wall.

Do it for you,
because you deserve clarity.
You deserve to be happy,
and you deserve to be free.

Put down the poison,
and stop killing your mind.
Tomorrow can be better,
just hit pause then rewind.

Most importantly though,
forgiveness is key.
Forgive yourself,
the person you used to be.

Reviews

[alanwgraham]

This is a very intense look at the great dilemma of mental illness Jack. To take the pill or not, that is the question. Unfortunately you are not in a frame of mind to make a sane judgement. I've been there myself recently and I try to remember that I'm taking the pills for my loved ones. Thanks for sharing.
Take care,
ALA N