Only If

Only If

Only If I was prettier..:

Then he would see me

Not cringe at the sight of me

Only if I was kinder

Then he would not get so angry

Telling me how I wrong him

Only if I clean better

 Then he would not want

To escape being here

  Only If I was skinner

Then he would be

More attracted to me

Only if I was stronger

Then I would be able

 not need him as much

 Only If I was quieter

Than he wouldn't want

me to shut up

 Only if I could smile less

 Then he could be happier

 Only if I didn't care as much

Then I would be

Like everyone else

 Only if I didn't see things that way

 Then I could

 Resemble everyone else

 Only if I hadn't said that

Then maybe He would not

 Only If I could stop feeling

Then He could be at peace

 Only if I hadn't dropped that glass

he be able To see how I am worthy

 Only if the car wouldn't have broke down

Then he would not be Upset with me

 Only if the weather didn't rain so hard

then the yard wouldn't have flooded out

 Only if the boss would give him his due

Then he would not blame me for

  Only if I stopped being friendly

Than people would not want

To talk to me

 Only if I didn't want to be love

Then he would be

Less critical of everything

 Only if I could just accept

That he was God to me

I am only the dirty gum

Stuck to his shoe

Only If

You could have seen

 The beauty

 that stood before you

Only if

You would have accepted

The great things

I was offering

Only If

You wouldn't have try to

Claimed my soul

Only If

You would have listen

 Then you would have realized

I would never give up my faith

Only if

You would not have tried to tell me

What it was I believed

Only if

You would not have

 Pushed to make me believe

 Something that was not

My truth

Only If

You had seen things the way I had

Maybe then

You would not have gone too far

Nevertheless,

then I would still be where I was

 Totally becoming

More fearful

 And never feeling like I belong

 Or that I had a right to feel anything

 People they were just being nice to me

 How could they like me?

 So all the only ifs

Are over

 Only If I could

Find the appreciation to thank -you

 For taking it to the core

Because the Only Ifs

Would still be going on.

So thank you

Because of your final only if

 I would give up my faith

Letting go

 Of all the things

 That I had left

To still being standing

 Only If

This could help someone

Who is in the only if cycle

Get out before the only Ifs

change the very core

Of whom you are

 Only if the world could

cherished and love

 The variety, the differences

 Only if everyone could reach out

 To those in the Only Ifs syndrome

Save a soul;

 Letting them know

 They are a valuable

Part of the human existence

 Only if we all could see each other from

A perspective of each one needing the other

 to shine our light  on this world

 Only if

 

Lynn Higgs June 2008