Untold

Untold

A Poem by Sunburn

Everything that you said
And all the things that I spoke
Lost in the crowd of
Everything that was left untold.

© 2017 Sunburn


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Untold can have power, whether it be to move on or to drag down.

Posted 6 Years Ago


After Thoughts.........sigh
If only we had said-
Sometimes it is to late to say...

Interesting.....

Jazzy

Posted 6 Years Ago


So much hinted at in so few words. To analyse would destroy the personal nature of those four lines.. i'll merely re.read and leave the second half to dream on..

Posted 6 Years Ago


Hmmm. This one sparked some thinking. I see a statement of the weight of the untold outweighing the "telling." As a naturally curious person, I, of course, immediately want to know just what was told? Was it told through action or words? Was it actually perception rather than outrighting telling. And about this "everything left untold," is this experiential - the loss of would might have been if more had been shared? The use of "crowd" interests me as well. Literally, lost in crowd of people or friends? Lost in the crowd of missed opportunities to say more, show more, share more? Both?

This is definitely a piece that demands greater thought beyond the four lines printed.

The only toe-stubber for me is the use of "told" and "untold." It sounded a bit redundant when I read this aloud. Perhaps the use of "unspoken?" or something of that ilk? I think it might add a harder punch. Just my two cents, for what they are worth.

Well penned! Thanks for the thought provoking session and a chance to get out of my own head for a bit!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Sunburn

6 Years Ago

Thank you very much for your kind review. Been away from the site a bit so wasn't sure how things wo.. read more
Very deep and thoughtful, I liked it.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Sunburn

6 Years Ago

Thank you for your review and of course for the time you took to read my little work...
Najam Us Saher

6 Years Ago

It was my pleasure reading this. ☺

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Added on November 28, 2017
Last Updated on December 1, 2017

Author

Sunburn
Sunburn

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I write poetry... more..

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