Memory & Disappointment (2006)

Old Xmas Poem '06

Days are inches

          to Christmas as candy cane lights

driven in, plugged and fluorescent

          incandescence to paths leading

here where memories' children excitably pleading

          pleasing mom n' daddy with obeyence

eager in the orders nipped above holiday sounds

          carolling trees ornamentation erected

remembering the rituals, one's real life family theatre

          frost is whispering behind his teeth

daddy use to climb the roof

           mimicks the reins and jingles all the way

not to over do it with Santa-calls or Ho's

           can't act this well,

 

but you're young, everything needs touching

           days like a funny film by a foreign - exchange student

with scenes semi-audible which

           the best parts are the ceremonies sported

decorated with mom's misguided missile mumblings

           Jesus is the reason - (to take away Rudolph's fame & joy)

the laughter was performed, palpable, plageristic

           play happy ploys portraits on normalcy

hung with strategic care (kept company by rosaries on virgin statuettes)

           memories now like stray tinsil after

we undress the tree (secretly drag with soprano stealth)

          to dumpster a dungeon, dropped like it was hot...

 

...when  i  return to the crime-scenes with ambivolent reds

          blind-white eraser to recollection, silent of snap-shots' surrounding

serenades and traditional sounds seasoned

          this child's melody of sweetest familial crust , as real as

solid objects, burning ice, floating in water,

          the sensations of feeling thrills highs lowest numbing needs

 

to validate one's life, the rage to solve the glory

why me questionings and leaving behind salt grains of legacy

at least to ponder on pasts (if precious were those days loved,

a good childhood equals happiness accomplished)

 

why does a jew's birthday take away the seasoning

my memories are vinegar-bitter that

of mom avoiding the snow, (angels look nothing like anhks)

precious are the days aware

how promises are easy, convinced to create futures

better than the ones lost in the highways

of life, i blame only time - (hurries without us considered)

wishes only change your awareness

wanting something, hoping magic Christmas will return

the wide-eyed-smiles excited

gifts are waiting to be gained (were we well-behaved?

endowed good deeds done?)

 

HEAD-LINE:

"boy-scout on christmas day opens disappointment..."

Santa : 0 (zero) / Grinch : won.