I Wanna Look Up at the Stars

My attempt at a love poem.

I Wanna Look Up at the Stars

 

To feel the cool breeze

Upon my skin.

To make a memory to keep

Even though dreams don’t always win.

 

I wanna feel the touch

Of a special moment.

To have a gentle hush.

I wanna look up at the stars.

 

The expanse wide�"

Even more than the eye can see.

A dark sky filled with twinkling lights,

All meant to be.

I wanna be beneath

All the wonder afar,

Allowing myself to believe.

I wanna look up at the stars.

 

To feel the closeness

Of the one my heart loves so.

To be beside him in peaceful rest,

Sharing in the brilliance bestowed.

 

To find that heaven isn’t as far as I thought,

As our heartbeats sync.

To have love brought

When our eyes meet.

 

I wanna simply be with him,

And find myself in his safe arms.

Would his eyes shine like the sky’s gems?

I wanna look up at the stars.

Reviews

[Philip Muls]

The poem clearly shows your heart is open to the energy of love but also to the energy of the universe. "I wanna look up at the stars." I believe that synchronicity is driving this poem.

Well done.

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.

[Davidgeo]

1st line 3rd stanza --- The expanse wide"

Was that stray quotation mark purposeful? I don't see an obvious one so I'm assuming it's a typo.

It's sad it took the 145th view to bring that too your attention.

For a love poem it's kind of sterile. The emotion seems plastic and contrived. I feel like I just read a cheesy hallmark card. Sorry. The writing isn't bad at all it's just, eh, completely vanilla. That's not a good thing for a love poem to be.

[Melinda McQueen]

Oopa it was a typo. Thanks for your honesty.

[Davidgeo]

Anytime baby doll.

[Melinda McQueen]

Oh i know what happened. For some reason the site equates the two dashes (--) as ( " ). I usually fix it but I didn't catch it this time. lol

[Davidgeo]

Weird. The code on this site is probably pretty outdated... like, 2009 style. Probably explains that.

[Sheila Kline]

A glance into the Heavens may certainly bring solace to one in seeking ways to obtain that which we desire. Your love poem is beautiful; romantic, comforting, searching - just as it should be!

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.

[Brianna Brie]

Your attempt at a love poem was successful. It seems you must have done this before now. Love is often times much bigger than ourselves. Looking up to the stars is a wonderful metaphor to the awl and wonderment of love.

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.

[GalaxyGhost]

I love astronomy so this is my favorite reads this week.

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.

[Valentine]

Many times day or night I look up and talk to Him. He always is there listening. Valentine

[Melinda McQueen]

Yes He is.

[Coyote Poetry]

Hopeful and beautiful words dear Melinda.
"I wanna simply be with him,
And find myself in his safe arms.
Would his eyes shine like the sky’s gems?
I wanna look up at the stars."
We need a safe place to be. Thank you for sharing your amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure dear Melinda and you are welcome.

[wordman]

you painted a lovely image,looking up at the stars,looking for that perfect one

[Melinda McQueen]

Thank you for reading and leaving your review.