I like this one a lot more! Hope you dont mind but Im gonna re structure it here lol imagine it centered. If it upsets you feel free to delete my review :)~ I just think structure makes the work easier to read and makes it stand out more. Hope Im not pushing it but I removed a word or two. Please let me know what you think.
Not to far from
the other side;
as the nights go by
the days just
seem to fly.
You wonder
what is next
where does
the road
lead you,
Will you do right
and keep it lie free
and be true.
The road usually
has it's bumps
so it's best to fill
those holes,
be a success
in life and reach
your ultimate goals.
Travel the long path
try and remain on the tracks,
but the skills and brain
are what some lack.
Life is razor sharp
like a blade, and slowly
but surely the light
just fades.
I like this one a lot more! Hope you dont mind but Im gonna re structure it here lol imagine it centered. If it upsets you feel free to delete my review :)~ I just think structure makes the work easier to read and makes it stand out more. Hope Im not pushing it but I removed a word or two. Please let me know what you think.
Not to far from
the other side;
as the nights go by
the days just
seem to fly.
You wonder
what is next
where does
the road
lead you,
Will you do right
and keep it lie free
and be true.
The road usually
has it's bumps
so it's best to fill
those holes,
be a success
in life and reach
your ultimate goals.
Travel the long path
try and remain on the tracks,
but the skills and brain
are what some lack.
Life is razor sharp
like a blade, and slowly
but surely the light
just fades.
My name Is Jorge I am 22 years old. I have been writing Poetry since the 7th grade which is about 10 years but on and off until about 3 years ago since then been writing alot lately to free my mind. I.. more..