True Friends

This isn't actually a story. This is actually an essay that I had to do at school. It's suppose to be a persuasive essay. And I was told that it was good or whatever. So... ya

   Bullies. Everyone’s had on, and everyone’s been one, if you know it or not. And I’m not just talking about those kind of bullies that beat us up. No. I’m talking about those who make us feel highly conscious about ourselves. Those who make us feel hated, unwanted, betrayed. You don’t have to beat someone senseless to be a bully. Sometimes, being a bully could be just as simple as talking about someone behind their backs. Gossiping about someone is just like bullying.

                     

   The word “bullying” might be a strong word to explain this, since the word “bully” means “use of superior strength, typically to force other people to do what you want”. We might have to use another word since I’m not talking about the “violent bullies”. I’m talking about the “backstabbing” kind of bullies that calls you their friend, right before stabbing you in the back. Not all people know that they are doing this, or may not think that they’re being mean while doing so, but for some reason, this has really upset me. I don’t know why, but I take this very seriously. And I’m going to try to let you see my point of view on this, and why exactly I take this seriously. So, you see, this essay has a twist to it. You thought that I was going to talk to you about “bullies” when I’m really going to talk to you about “friends”.

 

   What’s the definition of the word “friend”? If you looked it up yourself, you might find something like this, “Friend; a person whom one knows and loves, no matter how foolish and crazy you are. Someone that you could just be you around.” There is a saying that says, “It is better to have an ENEMY who honestly says they hate you than to have a FRIEND who’s putting you down in SECRET.” Which, I feel like that’s completely true. So when I hear someone do that, it just… hurts.

 

   Some people may believe that being friends with a Christian is a good idea because they believe that everyone is equal and should be loved. That’s probably true. They believe that they should always be there for someone when they need it. Some people believe that a private school is much better and nicer than a public school because everybody there is a Christian and won’t judge you for just being yourself. Which isn’t surprising since that’s how all Christians are supposed to act. Nonjudgmental and opened to anyone that needs it. The part of being opened to anyone is true, but the nonjudgmental part, sadly isn’t.

 

   Just like in public schools, private schools has some very mean and judgmental people in it as well. It’s just harder to be able to spot. We’re all teens in high school, always judging people and thinking of only ourselves. Which is why it used to be so hard for me to make friends here. I still do, it’s just not that hard anymore. I don’t know who I could be able to trust. I don’t want to be so close to people just so I could get hurt.

 

   I’m that kind of girl who keeps quiet and study everything that happens around me, taking it all in. And I’ve seen the same things happen over and over again. A new girl makes a friend at school, so she’s happy. But as I watch even more closely, I see and overhear that her friend talks about her behind her back, about what she hates about her and everything. Sometimes, kids don’t do this on purpose, and sometimes, kids are just mean. But either way, when that same girl finds out that they were talking about her behind her back, she becomes heartbroken and torn. And that’s probably why I’m so cautious around people. Because I’ve seen it happen before, and I don’t want the same thing to happen to me.

 

   Someone told me why they wouldn’t talk about me behind me back when I told them about this. They said that I’m perfect, that I don’t do anything. But that’s only because I’m shy, and that I don’t talk much. But what would happen if I stopped being shy, and I did act like myself around people. What then? Everyone as something in their personality that someone doesn’t like, and I’m pretty sure that I have a ton of those. After all, back at my old school, I wasn’t too shy around people. I acted crazy around others just because I wanted attention. So, there may be people who act absolutely nuts or may lie a lot about obviously untrue things. But that’s because they want attention! Don’t make fun of them for that!! It just makes me so mad when that happens since that’s the same thing that had happened to me…

 

  And if I didn’t persuade you enough, yet, then just think this way. I know that everyone has a best friend that they feel close to, right? Ok, good. Now imagine that you find out that your friend ship with this person was all just a joke to him or her, and that every secret that you’ve ever told them they went and told the whole class, having a good laugh at you. Doesn’t that feel great? I didn’t think so. Now, pretend that that didn’t happen. Now imagine that you act or have a certain way that you can’t help or that you think that that is the reason why everyone loves you. Like, you have a certain hair due or that you have O.C.D. Now imagine, for the longest time you’ve had this. Then, you find out that that friend has been telling everyone in the school how much they hate it and that they don’t know why you even wear or do that. They just think it’s stupid. It doesn’t feel great. So why try doing it to someone else?

 

   I know that I’m not so good at trying to persuade people in writing, but I do know that I am very good at writing about my own experiences and my own feelings about things. And if people keep this kind of thing up, there might be one person who could be scared for life about this, and it will turn into trust issues, them having a hard time trusting people again. Ok. I know that people aren’t exactly like me, but if they were, we would have a lot of hurting and untrusting people in this world, don’t you thing? And, yes, I know that you may have been taught to become friends with everyone, even the people that you think behind their backs! So zip it. Keep it to yourself.

Reviews

[Alice Maria]

Hi, I definitely understand where you are coming from. I'm also the shy girl in school, but I'm the girl who always has good grades. I've been bullied both to my face, behind my back, on the internet. I have written some of my poems based on this. Your essay really made me think. It made me think about why they bully people. I still can't find the answer. Anyone being bullied needs to know that they aren't alone. Thankyou for writing this essay I really enjoyed it.

[matrixmark]

Bullies....i am a person which will all stand up to these people.
First of all, your writing has a real good flow to it and was easy to read. You have a very good structure to this and your grammar is of a good standard. You talk about numerous subjects which is all part of the learning curve of when we grow up. But the older we get, the wiser we get to and by you saying that you observe people, then you are already learning about trust.

I liked this piece - there were a lot of truths in it.

Mark.