Maybe

I wish that I could go back in time and tell my younger self that everything gets better, but I'm not a time traveler and I've never really been good at lying anyways. I would like to say that by growing up having everybody I tried to lean on slip away has made me stronger and more independent, but it's only torn me down and made me numb. If I could tell you that the first girl I fell in love with loved me back, I would probably be a happy person. I don't know what it is about me that makes people leave, but I'm sure that they all have good reasons. My mom, brothers, countless friends, and so many people who for some reason I though cared about me. Maybe they did. Maybe I'm the weird one because I'm willing to do so much for the ones I care about. Maybe they lost interest. Maybe they thought I didn't need them. They obviously don't need me. I probably did something to have this life, and I'd really like to know what. I'm just going to keep hoping things will get better, they can't stay like this forever. Maybe somebody will give me the long, uncomfortable hug that I need and maybe they'll stick around to help me out. Maybe I wont die alone.